Lying on my chest the heart beat of a hummingbird
Love and Passion Incarnate
A Seraphim with ***** Wings
The Open Box of Pandora
and all that one and a million talk
High frequency modulation betwixt
the souring doves of ecstasy
and the rain No! halberd hail!
Knifing the streets and back alleys of Brooklyn
on the subways again I recognize the worst of myself
in the lush of my Yin

The other day something happened to me that hasn’t happened since High School
A scream audible, loud, but only for me
In my mind
Sustained for mere moments
And then gone
Rousing like a battle cry
But with a hint of anguish
Peeling back my eye lids like banana’s
Rattling its cage
Like a beast that has grown to large for its master
And is dumped down the toilet like a sewer crocodile
As if ready to burst from my skull
And spread its tattered bat wings
Heave the birth breath and swoop down lower Manhattan
To terrorize hipsters
Its fire breath singed my eyebrows
And burned down the walls of my capitols of reason
Biases and assumptions
Forever breaking my ties
And branding my forehead with the name Urgnd

He looked out on landscape of glittering monoliths Black and Shining Brilliant
Esoteric machineries of the Gods astraddle
Glancing up into the eyes of a stranger
The words fail at a universal moment of recognition
Facing the one way mirror
At the foot of the behemoth
CLANG! CLANG! Rang the bashing bright struts
Gilded bodies in words and actions
Circuits and wiring showing up from underneath
The thin layer of sheet metal
That barely contains the whole lot
As bits jangle and disclose inner contents
But he is only left to wonder
In the eyes of another

Ugly pensive shuddering blah dee dah
Wondering where the wind is
Holding back for god knows what
Crippled by ghosts with long ropes
Making a spectra out of myself
Passive abuse waiting for the sunrise
That never comes
Because the sun only sets
On the travelers journey
And the wind only blows
At the command of Demigods
The time is nigh

Let us compare life to a large white goat
That will eat anything you put in front of it
Even a bent rusted tin can with some rain-watered down beans

Or a young man with long hair listening to zeppelin
Strangling himself in his room for pleasure
Or playing party games where nobody knows the rules

Where some make them up but others follow theirs
And in the end everyone goes home

******* mornings coughing up grey phlegm
Phloem and Iggy’s Stooges walk on the wild side to dirt
Playing in the background  
Smell of rubber
Bands and angry men singing
***** words and healthy birds outside the window chime in
Getting skinnier
Having bizarre twangy renditions played out in the mind
And laid flat on keyboards in bat-swarmed attics
fantastic dreams of large cocked sailors
Muggy Mondays sold with a half bored flourish of enthusiasm

Why are we conscious?
Why life?
The universe
infinite flux
Epic Smashing parts together
Brains splattered by speeding bullets
Simple physics
Described in abstract numbers
Sublime
It’s so plain
So regular
How Life is extinguished without emotion
In an instant
Unseen and unremembered
Why did we even bother?
To become conscious at all
To perceive futilely the world
And despair in the flux
Anguish in the face
Of pure entropy
Absurdity is the only legitimate feeling
And yet there are so many more
Why? I want to know!
Why this fait?
Why could I not be a chair?
Simply sitting, never thinking the thoughts
My bane and my bone
My plagued thoughts
In pursuit of clarity
Like a sore that would go away
If you would
Just
Stop
Picking it