I hide what I feel inside
For fear of what you might say.
If life is like a roller ride
Then mine could fly off the tracks any day.

Music eases my troubled soul
And relieves my stress as a whole.
If you were to come in my room
You wouldn't see my inner gloom.

I smile on the outside
So that you won't realize I'm dead on the inside.
If you really looked into my eyes
You'd find the reveal all my outward lies.

I am impossible to label no matter how hard you try
Because I'll retain my individuality until the day I die.

I fall too easily
Even though I know
You could never love me
I still smile and keep up the show.

I try to look on the brighter side
But I see so much pain
When you see the true person they hide
Your thoughts would never be the same.

I don't care to fit in
If you were like me
And had to live in my skin
You is all you'd want to be.

They call it suicide
But on the inside we've already died.
You say you care
But when I needed you no one was there.

I put the gun to my temple
But you're really pulling the trigger.
When you look at the pistol
Do you realize that your mistake was much bigger?

I gave you all I had
But it not being enough made you mad.
I gave you my heart
But you preferred to rip it out.

When I asked if you could hear
It fell on a deaf ear
Despite all that was said
You didn't hear a single word.

But now that I'm dead
Maybe what I had to say will stick in your head.

Why can't I see through these bloodshot eyes?
Why do I need this poison so bad?
Why can't anyone see past all my lies?
Why when you help do I get mad?

I stuck the needle in my arm
I thought I could handle it
But I didn't contemplate the harm
Now the pain I felt I can never forget.

I feel the poison entering my veins
Temporarily alleviating my pains
But when it wears off I'll need another dose
Being able to get close to people is what I miss the most.

I needed you but you needed a needle
Thats how I feel
When I look down in the casket and realize it's real
Your pride was crushed long ago like a beetle

You pushed everyone away
And yet
At the end of the day
No one will forget
How you needed drugs
And when you asked for help it was met by shrugs

As I lay my head down to rest
You ask if you may pull the rope
And my response is be my guest
for what is life when you've lost all hope.

I watch as the golden blade seems to descend from heaven
Waiting for the blade to come crashing back down to earth
I was brought into this world at the hour of seven
And ever since cursed from my moment of birth.

Praise from others made my heart grow warm
So I gratefully agreed to stand atop there platform
But now I fear that I am in for a great fall
For I turned my back on reason and became like you all.

I look out into the crowd of spectators
And see not one of your faces
For instead all those people you called haters
Have taken your places.

I feel no regret, for I know my legacy no one shall ever forget.
Heaven or Hell it does not matter where I go for my end is but a show.

I'm a puzzle peace that just won't fit
Yet you keep trying to force me to conform.
No matter how much I complain you won't quit.
You keep trying to mold me into a perfect form.

You can't appreciate what makes me unique.
You believe I'll be happier without a name.
No matter what you think
I will not allow such shame.

You tell me I could be perfect
If I just listen
But I know it won't be worth it
For inner shell would thicken.

I am piece h
I fit where no others go
For as we age
We finally start to grow.

Humanity is a mystery never to be solved
Ever since the first day we evolved.

Why did you leave
A little kid with no hope?
A little kid afraid to believe?
A man slowly nearing the end of his rope?

You were gone by the time I was two.
I never got to feel your touch.
I feel like I would have been better with you
But unfortunately in that I was asking too much.

Why couldn't you stay?
Why did you have to go away?
Over you I shed many a tear.
Because of you my head is never clear.

I sometimes wake in the middle of the night
Screaming your name
Hoping you will come back and make it all right
But the next day I always feel so much same.

Maybe it is time I bid you a due
For  I truly never needed you.

As they put me under
I can only wonder
What is wrong with me?
Is it person I see as me?
Is it my extra weight?
Is it how people hate
Just because I dont fit?
Maybe its that I refuse to quit.
No, nothing is wrong with me.
Me is all I can ever be.
I might not be hot.
I'm happy with what I've got.
My beauty is on the inside.
Myself I can no longer hide.
I don't need to be under the knife
Because unlike you I'm happy with my life.
To you this must seem so strange
but to me I see no reason to change.