Now I realize

pages are not filled with
the people as they are
but only as you wanted them to be
because
they are the melting snow
on the emerging spring

and you are the warmth

Things aren't getting better
With all these lines
Across the sand
Through another land
But we can pretend its fine

Once blue collar, never white collar
You're stuck with the dollars
You earn
And only learn
What you must
Cause these lines keep us separate
So just forget it

waiting to fall asleep
i forget the dream of last year
how you would gently weep
while our smoke filled the car

i'm not a music man
and I can't believe i'm writing this again
when i should have known it was the end

you see it a shame
that your shrine to you
cannot be perfumed
by digital incense

I dreamt that we were naked.
coddled in white sun,
swathed in snow sheets

except,
only your eyes could breathe:
your body was lifeless,
only existing

in fact,
I remember your eyes the best;
lapis in ivory
crucibles in glass.

Fold your clothes into your bag
Don't forget your advil,
You'll need it for the jet lag

We both know this is it;
We can keep it terse
Just take our picture,
Fold it up
Keep it in your purse.

The city is waiting for you
And we ain't nothing new
You can see what they say
And maybe I'll see you around one day

"like, **** me man;
I know, I talk like this a lot,
and I get it, you're not a fan.
but I'm just trying to cope with it--
although I don't even know what I hope for.
maybe I'm just too alone.

I mean, I wanna phone to say how much I think about her,
but I don't think she'll have that;
is a hello too much to ask?

I think about those boots she liked, with the fur,
and where she put her head when she slept,
and that night I got too drunk on those flasks.
yknow, that night, we missed that band,
but if we're being honest here,
I was happy enough just sleeping with a friend.

why do I feel like this?
I told her,
and myself most of all,
'I can't do this right now. I'm prone to hurt and bound to fall'
and it was true! or, I believed it to be so,
but looking back, I think it was a defense:
it was a inherent wall
put up a long time ago to hide my lows.

and now here I am! telling you this,
hoping she didn't take part of me with her,
even as I was headed towards the door,
watching her saying goodbye,
naked,
on that old wooden floor."