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Jun 2011 · 1.9k
This Whitest Purse
Mellow Ds Jun 2011
Staring into stars, the lonely people drink their tears
And genuflect to empty car parks and swallow their fears
Like Ernest Hemingway, they grit their teeth and laugh
******* a pocket bullet, contemplating aftermath
And the shadows bend and grow…
And the embers shine below.

Geared for success, the lonely boy begins to starve
His chest heaving from stress, his wish for waterfall in cars
Freeways self-entitled, forcing ants into the gutter
While a lonely father cries and the boy freezes and sputters
And the doorway opens up
As the mouth is finally shut.

“I’m not mad, son, you’ve only disappointed me”
Father, point the way for me, where is my life leading?!
Should I sacrifice my happiness for a chance at succeeding?
Should these calloused hands be empty, do I need a beating?

You need to straighten up your tie and keep your noses clean.
My mother’s eyes in moonlight silently judging me
Inhumanity, why don’t you rule these streets?
I bite my bottom lip and gaze down at my feet
Lumped chunk of nicotine
Pushing itself out of me.

I want to stop blending rainwater with my leaking eye-sockets,
Crying for another with which to share my gold locket,
Tossing and turning, wondering where I will be next
And for God’s sake, can I do it, am I trying my very best!?

Why can’t I get up on time like every normal human being?
Why do I always get sick, why do my guts hate me?
Why are all my joints always crackling and aching?
I never want to live, don’t ever try to save me!

“I’m not mad, son, you’ve only disappointed me”
Father, point the way for me, where is my life leading?!
Should I sacrifice my happiness for a chance at succeeding?
Should these calloused hands be empty, do I need a beating?

Staring into stars, the lonely people sit and smile
Counting all the faces staring back, retracing miles
Celestial serenity, striving for an energy
Never needing inquiry, embracing the no thing!

Should these calloused hands be empty?
Do I need a beating?
Will these pruning hands deceive me?
This Universe is in me.
Feb 2011 · 3.2k
Cyborg
Mellow Ds Feb 2011
Blindsided by a rhinoceros.
Tendons, muscles, unraveling. I can't do this any--
Glitch, system failure, shutdown
Restart, blue screen, flashing cursor
Epileptic shock. Epinephrine injected
Command line. Run:

Beautiful flying objects thrown violently.
Don't open this door! Kiss me hard
And not in a good way (if you remember how),
Like when fishes try to breathe on dry
Land on jagged Rock
Climbing without
Gears spinning and clanking
*** and pan. (Glass and sand)

Sizzling in this artificial sun
Created by brainwaves soaked in
****** and LSD and yellow cake uranium
Ghostriding patterns erupting like
Stop. Fail. Restart.
Detecting equipment...
No input present. How will you communicate?
Try again. Restart.
Password required.

Why don't you eat?
These tears are making my face numb.
Put this in your arm.
Trust me, you'll love it.
You'll have Tesla coming out of every orifice.
Dancing physics, matryoshkas.

You can deny the existence of a God and live,
But if you deny the existence of gravity...
Well, just try and walk off this cliff.

"These thoughts are so scattered.
I don't even think they're mine."
Those memories? They're not yours.
They belong to your master's daughter.
-------------------------------------------------------­---------------------------------
We're Replicants.
We boot up, we shut down, we most definitely restart.
Viruses make us sick and sometimes break us to the point where we need new hardware.
Sometimes they break our firmware and we need to wipe.
We have command lines to perform actions, and registry keys to keep memory stored of the things we learn.
The world is our power supply,
and when we boot up in safe mode,
like
some
people
do
every
day,

we only use the bare minimum of our potential.
------------------------------------------------------­----------------------------------
I must be dying, I'm only this awkward when I'm dying.
Connection timed out.
Feb 2011 · 1.2k
B-Side
Mellow Ds Feb 2011
I love the smell of my flesh in the morning
So soothing, like the ghost of the woman you're mourning
Conforming to a bitterness, you swore to me
That you wouldn't do what you did, but what's more to me
Is that your stain rests upon every thing that I enjoy
My heart is a consultant, don't insult it by calling it unemployed.
I put too much time into your eyes on my mind, in my rhyme
Undermined, badly timed, so let's get to other subject lines

Starlight baking cloudy, shaking
Hourglass breaking, howling naked
On a street corner, "Happy Birthday!" (belated)
Just say it. If it's in a reactor, it's decaying
A single rooftop smothered by snowflakes, earthquakes
Heartbreaks, salt shakers, risk-takers, green bakers
Understudy, crush me honey, lose my number, don't go under
Keep me waiting and debating, my hand shaking, the phone breaking

My face is a reflection of the sunlight's rays
Keeping a constant rumbling from underground at bay
And everyone complains that they're smothered in their own way
But when I rationalize the rainbows, their records won't play
I simply need the orchards to escape this lonely torture
A place to sit and paint in front of a tree and make a fortune
Soothing ears to rest and putting minds at ease
My music, a viral infection, a depressive disease

Constantly starving myself of the rain
I bring the trees to their roots and stimulate the brain
With a conflagration of color, instantly insane
Yet civilized, melody harmonized, urbane
The strings will vibrate and body rejuvenate
Conceptual mind-**** a rising heart-rate
The starlight glowing outwards, the falling of the towers
To signify to flip to side B in a mere matter of hours
(c) Ryan Bowdish 2010-2011
Feb 2011 · 988
Francisco & Reardon
Mellow Ds Feb 2011
I'm centralized ******* the eyes behind your face.
Your envy shines through your scars and lies fill your space.
The spot where you once stood is now occupied only by shadow;
Shattered shell, now simply useless, when you used to be fallow.
Speaking haunted words to impress, when they simply aren't your best,
Writing a  metaphorical mess to disguise the blood in your chest.
Rationalizing rage to reiterate your immunity to emotion,
When in truth, your feelings shroud you, like the earth consumed in ocean.
You've exhausted all your time preparing shipmates to drop bombs,
When you should have just put on a red shirt so they would remain calm.
Your day's gone, along with the girl you used to lay on, it's the
Same song, except the ******* sound engineer kept the delay on.
Your gears are running into each other and eroding off slowly,
Until the day your seconds stop ticking and prove that your lowly
Life can only be changed with a changed outlook on your self-worth.
When you let go of someone who never existed, you'll experience rebirth.

Masochism is enveloping you, sadism a byproduct,
Like the desperate excuses you force out of your itching tear ducts.
Gears stuck on 7, the motor's about to blow out.
Don't think now that this person you know is on the holdout.
It's so loud, the screaming amplified by your written words,
And though it hurts, you're coveting that which you don't deserve:
Quit creating your own mirages by expecting to find an oasis.
Until you realize there's only desert, you'll wither away and remain faceless.

Deception is a clever trick, but you're not so great of an actor
(Ironically enough), you have become your own detractor.
Eat fungus to reach the stars, when they're burning lightyears away and
All you're feeling is the warmth of your dopamine receptors at play.
Lying selfishly, forgetting how distinguished you once were,
Not only pushing your love away, but losing objective worth.
Letting a gorgeous figure become a disguise for broken homes.
With shattered moans, you drug-induce tattered bones.
The sadness grows, but only to those who see the truth:
Your admittance is a sign of the desperation leaking through.
A child wrapped in the body of some apathetic youth,
Not yet strong enough to turn away from the peeking moon
Instead of howling loudly, in sheer exhaustion and confusion.
You see, your image of me, like the oasis, is an illusion!
We've switched sides of the coin, you became what you hated.
But, from where did all your anger come? I thought emotions were overrated.

Human weakness is enveloping you, bitterness a byproduct,
Like the desperate excuses you force out of your itching tear ducts.
Fear stuck on max volume, the speaker's about to blow out.
Don't think now that this person you know is on the holdout.
It's so loud, the envy behind your spoken words,
And for what it's worth, you're insulting who once made you bless your birth.
Quit creating your own mirages by expecting to find an oasis.
Until you realize there's only sand left, you'll die thirsty and remain faceless.
(c) Ryan Bowdish 2010-2011
Mellow Ds Feb 2011
Just stay quiet and still, keep your hands on the wheel
She's all ******* in the back just to prove that we still feel
A twisted, little punk all strung out on the junk
She lays like a ventriloquist's dummy, splayed out in the trunk

Just keep breathing baby, it'll be okay tonight
Once her body trembles, we'll all scream in delight
When her tears are spilling, we'll throw our ***** shillings
And celebrate gaily as we cry out in triumph daily,

"Clean streets, sobriety and unconditional artistry from a dog
Under my feet, like a genuinely unforgiving stone from a soft God
Water, be ******. Peace and all prosperity can come eat meat
From my hands. My rough palms tingling from the rain on this sheet.

Blotter, blotter. Let me corrupt your daughter. I know.
She was a soccer champion and now nothing but a ****** lost
Under a half-moon, harvest red, shining oh, so brightly in her head.
My men are out to get my money back but you won't notice the tools that they all lack.

Please go, and whitewash the teeth from the smile in the evergreen
Cheshire lies, untie this knot in my neck on my back, rebuff my sheen
Bumming for a smoke, hoping I will choke on it, *****, comets will rain for the death of beauty tragedy
Like the man before me, I'll be nothing but a veteran lost to prostate

Cancer. Answer me, my love. I'm ******. And it goes and goes and goes and goes and goes.

Who knows what grows, who is a bomb and calm as a Hindu cow?
Oxygen gets you high, you accept your fate
It's a good way to die but refrain from the urge to *******
I lie inside my mind ready to try again, depends
On if I come on too strong, it's been so long, so wrong to try and pick up on all these young ones.
It may be over for me but you can live out your life
And become something better than this high-
Way robbery
Of a child. So mild. Urbane."

And as she climbs out and fumbles, her body will crumble
Heels re-slit, we better fix it, get with it, the ball is still inside
Her mouth so she won't cry out so loud, oh why
Must we be doing this? I can't believe we're really going through with it!

My eyes are burning red and I can not help that this is dead
We came this far, don't back out on me now, anyhow the blood's on my hands
I demand answers! Why can't I hold the lantern? The car swerves
So just hold on tight, she'll blend in with the rain and mud tonight.

Don't worry, baby. Just keep driving to safety.
Just take a deep breath and sit still
Just shut up and keep your hands on the wheel
Every day this is how we feel.

And the only difference is I tell you.
(c) Ryan Bowdish 2010-2011
Feb 2011 · 1.6k
Infraction Distraction!!
Mellow Ds Feb 2011
If you wanna get a good look
Here is the number... 666 oh 123
Im a joker, man, really. Its all a mind game,
So let us recalibrate the beat.

A man in a bar wound up in a storm
Where he felt nothing could go wrong
But any minute now we will generate a sound
That will keep the lonely man strung along.
Hes eating his own insides, acid diethylamide
Running from the bunkers into sands
Where the men who fire against him innovate a system
To blow him sky high into a fan.
It was always just a joke,  they tied him another rope
So they could keep his heartache in a single cell
No lights and no wires, the squealing of tires
Echoing in his head like bats of hell.
When his heart becomes released, hes cured of a disease
That only the lonely men in the world will know
And he can keep it in a jar, at the top of his tower
So he can prove it was never just for show.

If you wanna get a good look
Here is the number... 666 oh 123
Im a joker, man, really. Its all a mind game,
So let us recalibrate the beat.
A friend of mine wanted to have this one,
And I gave him a warning from the heart
They howl like hyenas and they drain out the sun,
They were raised this way from the start!

Walking from a hotel, escaping from a padded cell
A woman's eyes adjust to the sun,
She turns to a rainbow over a concrete meadow
And she proceeds, repeatedly to run.
A siren sounds and the pigs fly down
And loudly beat her into the ground
But when the people scream for sobriety,
They send in the special ops team.
She is rolled into the ER, her mind is spilling over
Her entrails, for halls, on the floor.
When the nurse comes out, she kicks and shouts
Because needles make her feel like a *****.
The man sits beside her, a wall is his divider
But his voice screams for him to be resumed
His will is awakened, the loathing is shaken,
And the wall, by his hatred is consumed.

Infraction distraction! A chemical reaction!
A busted heart writhing from a soul unspoken
Attacking the black team, the voices clashing
The bodies piling up and Pandora's  box is opened.
Ripping the cords from her face with his 4word letter grace
He sweeps her off the bed and hangs them by the head
Collides with a building with gold-tooth fillings
Blacksmith, locksmith, shadows in the distance
He turns into a red raw onion on its hind legs
Trying to jump a distance that he cant place
He reaches for a killer bee and instead holds ***
And the birds head changes to a woman's face.
He lingers for a second until the shadows blink
Then he runs into a river to stop and sink
It was there he designed a building of its own kind
Where the woman and him practice witchcraft and sleep.

If you wanna get a good look
Here is the number... 666 oh 123
Im a joker, man, really. Its all a mind game,
So let us recalibrate the beat.
A friend of mine wanted to have this one,
And I gave him a warning from the heart
They howl like hyenas and they drain out the sun,
They were raised this way from the start!
(c) Ryan Bowdish 2010-2011
Feb 2011 · 1.1k
Knife Roulette???
Mellow Ds Feb 2011
Alleviate a misrepresentation done by an alienated tainted nation unstable unable to distill a thrill so full of life and underlying bites of lice and spices all lined up on the counter which slices all my toes into a loud and restless ghost from the coast to the bar room to where we keep the jar of fruit and peaches and human skulls.

I place your fingers on the table
Cornered like adjacent angles
Keep all your horses in one stable
And let the eyelashes all dangle.

Shouting all the answers into an empty can of no chicken noodle soup truly cooped up in my room because it seems to make no difference in the way I speak to my friends as long as they're right in the end, and I descend below the ranks as the one who makes a good point but you still want to **** yourself at the sound of his voice, no choice but to rid myself of the noise.

I place your fingers on the table
Cornered like adjacent angles
Keep all your horses in one stable
And let the eyelashes all dangle.

Your face echos like a long lost eagle in the chasm of a cliff filled with concrete, oh how evil is a lawn streaked with blood and guts and bones and ruts and pain and plucks of violin luck, honoring dishonoring never taken honestly, joyously devoid of these separated entities. Just back up for a second and speak, let me eat myself and weep, let me take my eyes out first so I can listen to your twisted verse

You drove my hearse! Clouds burst and from the sky comes a rain the color of your eyes and I don't know why I can't seem to clarify all the choices I have made in my past, mistakes and lies. I am nothing but a tool to make my own life much less hard to live and ever so slightly it takes me a bit **** this this **** is useless i dont even know why i ever ******* do this.

yet there's nothing wrong.

I place your fingers on the table
Cornered like adjacent angles
Keep all your horses in one stable
And let the eyelashes all dangle.
(c) Ryan Bowdish 2010-2011
Feb 2011 · 1.6k
Mellow D's
Mellow Ds Feb 2011
I always wanted to compose symphonies,
But my hands and my head could never agree.
I got the blue curse, because I always feel beats,
But my fingers freeze up when I get to melo-DIEs.
Recede. I want to live the nihilist's dream,
Smoke packs a day to intensify screams.
Maybe if I stare into the middle distance,
After hours I would build up a tolerance to listen.

IN THIS town, there are only 2 kinds of people
Girls who pierce their NOSES and THOSE IN the steeple
Walking down So. Auburn in bare feet and short shorts
Catching the gleam from the street (of course),
With their dreadlocks all up in auburn buns
And their eyes shooting diamonds in the autumn sun.
Bullet-belt vests draped lazily over their shoulders,
With double-zero earrings and squirt-gun holsters.

And the police-dogs and the SWAT cars are all powered by indulgence,
The doctors are up to their elbows in cadavers by self-expulsion
The men are splitting at the seams from over-eating obsessive compulsion
And the shameful deception of upward inflection to change my direction and wind
UP and the inanimate DUCKling with a large crank between its shoulders
In the shape of a black key to the black energy that makes the cold rooms colder
Is a disguise to the spoken word hurricanes brewing inside me.
Set me to zero then make me the hero so physicists can derive me.

If the sum of all forces is equal to mass times acceleration,
Maybe the sum of world problems is equal to vanity times irritation.
Jeans cutting up my legs, purpling due to lack of circulation
Are developing holes, as well as the soles of my shoes, I'm growing impatient.
The production slows to a halt, pouring salt into lacerations,
And as boys grow into drunk daddies, women resort to migration.
This country isn't democracy, just a ghastly and pale imitation,
These people don't have representatives, only half-assed representations.
(c) Ryan Bowdish 2010-2011
Feb 2011 · 1.2k
Nuclear Funk
Mellow Ds Feb 2011
So, here we go,  again.
Defining the prolific tranquility of my fellow men
Reproducing the rhythmic reflection like a Godsend.
We'll run along this tightrope until the world spins
And by the end of the night we'll slip right out of our skin.
Blasting the brainwaves like a fully automatic bass,
Kamikaze wasteland, humans waste, self-destruct without a trace
Just give these DJs a little space so they can give you a better taste!
And don't let us argue semantics so we can find the truth encased
In the back of the skull, underfed and oversold.
Truth be told, no one would like to feel that cold...
And you can deny it all until you crack and you fold,
But you know that by now you would have lost your soul!
Scandalous heresy mission, I'll describe the world I've envisioned
No carbon emissions, because there are no more cars to sit in
No more music, because there is nobody to listen
No more prison, because there are no buildings to live in
Until we've built it ourselves, and then we excel.
Civilization rebuilding itself right out of a living hell,
Like a phoenix, in a nutshell, and not a soul will tell
The truth about the world before the acid rains fell.

The world spins on a tilted axis of evil,
Over-trusted in the hands of incompetent people,
Lazily ignored by all the church and the steeples
Taking the arms of the weak and the feeble.
The rest of us wait until the bombs begin falling.
We no longer care, and frankly, God's stalling.
The end of the world is constantly calling.
No more of the bodies all twisted and sprawling.

I sever my hand to prove that I can still use my eyes;
You'll understand when you begin to open your mind
And if you really don't want me to do this, just give me a sign,
Maybe I'll do it anyway to disprove your design.
I'm losing time, someone come along and feed me a line.
Sever my spine, open my jaws wide, skin off my eyelids,
Why? The truth is inside these pockets of lies
And you can find it in the sockets of my eyes, it's fine.
As long as you can understand why the smog
Becomes a distant cousin to fog and road-hogs
Morph into another distraction from the absence of birds,
And why roads replace the forests until they no longer work.
The cities will be made of buckets and cans and bags of sand,
And supply and demand will win out over the prehistoric plans
To re-instill the aristocratic mastery monopoly pills
Produced from the radiated depths deep within the hills.
Buildings from old bits of iron and sheet metal pieces,
Our voices on intercoms to rid the world of its diseases,
And finally ignorance will not attempt to sway or displease us
And the love of the people will reflect that of Jesus!

The world spins on a tilted axis of evil
Over-trusted in the hands of incompetent people
Lazily ignored by all the church and the steeples
Taking the arms of the weak and the feeble
The rest of us wait until the bombs begin falling
We no longer care, and frankly, God's stalling
The end of the world is constantly calling
No more of the bodies all twisted and sprawling
(c) Ryan Bowdish 2010-2011
Mellow Ds Feb 2011
The monkey on my back is just a cigarette under the crack
Where your fingertips can not, anymore, the nicotine pursue...
A stain in my Egyptians, the painful intermissions
And nevertheless a violent ingestion, the cavalry consumed.
Dogs don't eat dogs unless they're the runts of the group,
And when they come out crooked, the casualties ensue.
Ribs on my shoulders, eyes in my aorta
And just as I guessed, from out of my chest, a ghost not unlike you.

Ive been here 666 years and the irony is insane
The only voices Ive had in my head were dripping off the brain
A zombie could knock down a wall or take 3 in the chest
But a dog with the head of a worm is quicker than the rest.
Uninvited your spine comes crashing into my field of view
Negatives of your face fading into non-photo blue
The tree canopy becomes a face that looks a bit like yours
But when it blinks my heart sinks, and you walk out the door.

Signals running every which way! Scream me, baby! Do it!
Lose my caller I.D. witch ***** slow
Drag
Drug
Love.

Eat it all under a vacuum heart and say the words!
Gooba gabba gooba gabba! We accept you, one of us!
Shoreline, waistline, eyeliner, center divider
Crash into the sea and settle underneath!
The bubbles quit rising! A man is inside!
He looks like your and my hatechild!

You wanted art!! Ill give you art!
As soon as my head stops circling around.

One of us!
(c) Ryan Bowdish 2010-2011
Feb 2011 · 2.5k
The Alliteration Song!
Mellow Ds Feb 2011
Anxiously awaiting atomic assimilation
Basing me on belligerent and boorish bastardization
Capsizing cargo with careful consideration as to
Deciding which day is decay's destination
Everyone embrace the elevated expiration
Forget my face and follow fabrication
Go to the gallows with grace and gravitation
He will hold you and hinder alienation

I, however, hold insignificance in interest
Justifiable jackhammers jacking fighter jets
Killing Californians who are kissing canvases
Lying without laughing and lighting cigarettes
My master makes me move my mundane mind
Never knowing next to nothing with nothing else inside
Overly offering operating override
Practicing patiently pulling peoples' pride

Quickly questioning quizzical quietness
Rationalizing raging reinventions ridiculous
Stapling this summer to my (still) sick subconscious
Traveling tunnelers trading tides for tiredness
Under the umbrella my undertow untangles
Violently vibrating like varying violin angles
Waiting with wandering whispers under the table
Xylophonist x-rays, excruciating fables

You yellow youngling, you who screams in my dreams
Zebras zoom by every single night, it seems
Let's chant my enchantments, the alliteration song!
And untie your tongue
So you don't take it wrong.
(c) Ryan Bowdish 2010-2011
Feb 2011 · 1.4k
The World Raps!
Mellow Ds Feb 2011
My brain is your atomic nuclear warfare paintings
All the while you face-lift X-box babies
Needle-thread we're dead babe don't you make a man crave
For things he can't quite understand but doesn't want to hit the hand.
Severance is fiction in the hands of friction,
****** deviance and erratic disobedience,
Covers the covers like a silk-screen layout
Jack it up and crack it up to be ****** up takeout.

Oh yeah? Well over we're starving ripping pieces off the mountains
Dentistry mythology, who needs a medical degree?
The label on the box said the tape was all in my head
But I don't hear a ******* sound except the fire all around
Grass is misleading and graffiti complaining
The AK is God here and through towns we're raiding
You think you got it so bad this is all the life we ever had
And don't you ever stop by cause our values are just alibis.

Okay, enough! This is all a double feature burger for here or to go
This is all a Catholic preacher in a Red Cross rodeo
Life is an airplane flying overhead carrying passengers with nothing in their heads
And turning all the lights out and pulling all the blinds down so they can't see the truth.
Disguise misguide and everything in between
Have you seen the ***** film with Jenna Haze and Jimmy Dean?
Garden salad, Diet Coke, check now and choke
Give us our bombs so we can run and go and rig the new VOTES.

Let me run it by the city council one more time
We're seeing flying cars and houses of cards and stumbling and tumbling
And rumbling and rumoring the hilarious splinter consumering
Maneuvering, assuming bottles fly with seagull eyes
The trees burn here like candy canes and run in the grass like membranes
Toxic fumes and entrails for reasoning and cold shame
Shudder at the thought of a shutter in a hot fuzz tee shirt worn by the slick insane
Generating heaterpuppy psychologic fragile now, undertow, the fifth row in the theater at the Apollo.
(c) Ryan Bowdish 2010-2011
Feb 2011 · 1.2k
These Days
Mellow Ds Feb 2011
There is no snow, a left turn is a careening roll
7, 8, 9 times, all along the road
Until the carriage turns over and makes us again feel whole
We count the moments that it stays, before it encrypts code
Juxtapose, lizards and rats, seagulls and bats
The underlying message is psychological attack
And when she opened up her mouth she let out a hack
So devastating and depressing that she turned and spat

These old bones and these old dreams are a glimpse of what's passed
And though the skies are turning gray, the blues, in mind, will last
A silver lining is a metaphor, it's never really been
A line designed to separate the sadness from the sin
My friends tell me I am a crosswalk between truth and hate
But in the end the truth is those who despise can relate
Detesting the human race is something worth the time
That's taken to reflect on my stubborn, fizzled mind

A shotgun is all we need to see the light of day
And one bullet is all it takes for them to steal it away
So grab your jewelry and your cash and clip them to your vest
Because your family wants to know the score when you lay to rest
Faultless isn't really a word, thoughtless is a theology
You say spell cat, I say spell Keynesian economy
Aristotle spent years trying to prove epistemology
Existentialism wiped him out with one written dichotomy.

Waiting for my ride to get to the drop of dreams
And when I take just enough I will be caught up in screams
The world around is shaking violently and everything gleams
And the golden from the sunshine on the buildings are my streams
I want to lie in branches made of paper and long legs
Keeping our eyes open, we're all stepping over eggs
Is it any wonder why my strife and struggles bleed?
A warm body and an acid bath are all I truly need.
(c) Ryan Bowdish 2010-2011
Feb 2011 · 1.2k
Track-Marks
Mellow Ds Feb 2011
The sadness continues and hilarity ensues:
With a close eye on the test tube, I burn down my venues.
Foxes and diamonds from the cancer within you
Grace my ****** health with phrases that spin you and
Body-parts scattered beside collapsed ladders with
Hair torn and tattered and dog jawbones shattered,
Deceived by a tarot-card-reading man with a hook hand
Who said the scam was a means to increase public demand
Before walking through sewers to see old friends skewered
On trees made of wire with leaves like computers
From Silicon valley rejects who were top of their classes,
Oblivious to the fact that they're dead to the masses,
Who only want cellphones that tell them their names,
So they can remember who they are and from whence they came
And how old they will be on their final birthdays,
When sunlight and skies will be fluorescence and X-rays
And children will tell all their mothers to die slow,
Because they're looking for something more loving than "I know
How much you hate yourself and the world surrounding
Because the applause at your funeral won't be resounding,
Plus your father loves alcohol more than your sister,
Who you may not have known, had your father not missed her,
Which is why all the walls are covered in blisters
And there are cat's eyes and hands peering out of the ******,"
To which there is no reply, save for incredulity,
For as we collectively die, you all put on all your jewelry,
Which was made by a child with no concept of labor,
Who gets less respect than sweater-vest wearing men in the paper
Who get there by switching the flow and catching the vapors,
Like sentient parasites or intelligent tapeworms
Who tell me it's unhealthy to meet someone and hate her
Simply because when I look at her all I see is the savior.
(c) Ryan Bowdish 2010-2011
Feb 2011 · 1.6k
Ultraviolet Eyes
Mellow Ds Feb 2011
The concrete depresses with each small step I take in the Arco parking lot
I fold this song up into my pocket and my schoolwork starts to rot.
Your hair hangs loosely by your eyes as you ration out my shots.
I wanted to remind you that your nails give me goosebumps, but I forgot.
Your legs laced up and shining in oil are sculpted out of bronze
Lying naked in aphids as we strive to be shameless among your father's front lawn

You are sunlight disguised by a sheet on a clothesline
In the middle of meadows made of wheatgrass and starshine
How can something so beautiful share a species with me?
A shopping cart overflowing with grace given away on the streets for free

My jeans are turning into strings of flayed fabric under your yellow moon
I'll shower you in music, if you promise to abuse it, within my crimson room
Lock me in my comfort stall with dividers emitting petroleum fumes
Break down all the walls with your desperate call as your temple, I consume
From within towers where light is devoured, against all odds, I bloom,
For a skeletal mastery with ultraviolet eyes crawls into my tomb.

You are a symphony of epiphanies for a boy made of concrete
In the midst of a city of asphalt and batteries.
You splat on my canvas and blast from my headphones
And if you opened me your name would probably be on my bones.

Keep the covers at bay
So I can admire your frame.
(c) Ryan Bowdish 2010-2011

— The End —