living through the scary parts
depression is a “work of art“
a normal life is all i need
i want the plants, don’t have the seeds
all i see is black and white
lead the way, show me the light
lobotomy
to treat all of my suffering
lobotomy
to turn this winter into spring

i wish i could cut my head open
to fix these broken things
crack this damaged skull
cut off these toxic strings
lobotomy
to fix the broken mess i am
lobotomy
to make myself believe i can
...live

i don’t know why i’m crying over these stupid feelings
overwhelming wave of emotions
just a chemical reaction
i don’t know why i’m chasing after something nonexistent
waiting for fantasy to become reality
just a mind full of dreams

time is
going by so fast
what can i do
to make the moments last
moments so shaping
the memories escaping
they made me who i am today
never the same as yesterday
who will i be tomorrow

feels like it was the other day
me skating down the streets
early summer evenings
getting tucked into the sheets
mom sang a sweet lullaby
from jumping fish and clouds so high
those happy days were long ago
not worrying about how life will go
how it will be tomorrow

i miss
goodnight songs to sleep
remember those nights
where i used to count sheep
now all i do is overthink
sometimes don’t even dare to blink
because as soon as my eyes close
i see the things i miss the most
what will it be tomorrow

when i’m in my bed
at night
lay my head down
cut the light
i hear oh every sound so loud
like thoughts of things that i once vowed
i hear the TV making noise
low self esteem of girls and boys
i hear my neighbors listening
to music i could never sing
i hear the frogs down at the lake
the calming noises that they make
those noisy nights keep me awake
please fall asleep, give me a break