these are the things
your mother never taught you:
(one)
someday you will break down
at a  traffic light, and you will
call your dad and cry and
it will be okay
(two)
you will fail math class
your first try, but eventually
you will get it right
(three)
some days you will feel burnt,
knuckles bruised and shoulders
shaking; you're too old to cry
but when no one is around
you will lose it
(four)
one day you will meet a girl who
changes everything, a girl who
looks at you like she believes that
under your skin you are
an ocean
(five)
under your skin you are
an ocean

They say a human
can spot the flicker
of a candle from 30
miles away, Hey,
out there, in the
dark, I can feel
your warmth
you're on a
train, I can
feel the
sing of
your
wheels
on the
tracks, lighting
rails towards me.

Paul told me to
******* as if
Brooke was just
an abbreviation
and I'm starting
to think that it is

i so often find myself
looking for a home
in men, in work, in
menial activities, in
angry runs where
I lose so much
breath my
lungs feel
like they
are

bleeding.

but I find solace in books,
page 3, page 10, 56, 145,
230, I don't ever want
to lose myself, i imagine
it's a sign of weakness,
or the inability to deal
with reality but the peace
is so alarming, it makes me
want to cry.