blue haze, i
wanted your
hubbabubba
chewed up
dreams, but
now i feel
like i am
drowning
in a garbled
mess of blue
blue blue
blue bluer
than your eyes
(no not
drowning-
you would
find that too
dramatic) i
am choking
on bits of you
that keep
surfacing on
my tongue.

at the end of the
day i am just a girl
who wears red lipstick
and watches too many
movies to be considered
sociable.
please  know  that if  it
ever comes down to it
i will still pick you.
regardless of what
you did to me, it
will always be
you.

most of my favorite songs have
become  prisons.  i  can  hear
the sound of you humming
beneathe every line and i
swear  i  c a n  feel  your
nose pressing into my
neck   w i t h    each
passing    chorus.

occasionally i feel a
need to draw you,
to paint the veins in
your arms, to write
you into the margins
of other things i'm
working on. but i let
it sit, i let it stew just
on the edge of my
fingertips and pulsing
in the palm of my
hand until it is less
of an oncoming train
and more like a paper
plane on a playground.
i draw myself, i paint
myself, i write myself
into the margins instead.

go       d    
at       the
        end       of the      
        night i       am  just      
     looking       simply        
             f o r       someone      
who talks       like      y o u

i feel less like
chunks of me
a r e     falling
into  the river
that i  so very
love.     thank
y  o  u    f  o  r
walking away
from what we
could    h a v e
b e e n.  i   a m
w o r t h   t h e
entire     s k y-
every   star  in
the milky way
-and   i f   you
couldn't   s e e
that  then  you
shouldn'thave
been   allowed
to    c a l l   me
y   o   u   r   s  .