If life is a book, then these words that I’ve written
Of dreams and of wishes and of places I’ve visited
Mean nothing when there is no reason for living
So I’ll scatter the pages, indecipherable now
Stand by and watch as the clouds cry down
The ink sliding past, creating blurred lines
Until totally clean is this story of mine
I will start over new, an attempt to cheat time
I’ll rewrite the past, sketch new storylines
A careful redraft, but I’ll make sure this time
That instead of hers, you are mine.

Autumn comes when summer fades
As treetops drop their bright façade
Behind horizons, the sun retreats
I fear I’m left with only memories

I stood before the water’s edge
And touched my skin against it’s ledge
Water once warm and blue
Turned frigid cold and icy too

My hand felt safe beneath your grip
Oh so careful and yet I slipped
A promise I had made in June
To never fall in love with you

Oh birds of summer, don’t leave me here
For I can’t stand the cold
I wish that I could follow you
It is Autumn and I’m alone

Insomniatic clouds drizzle rain above my head
A dream-like thought I wish would thread
Though a poor seamstress, I truly am
My mind still frayed at every end
Wide awake I find myself
The rain, I cannot stop it now
It pours and pours, a thunderstorm
The water rises, a river formed
It proceeds to flood my thoughts once more
Booming thunder, lightning flashes
A fire started, spreading ashes
These awful, distracting dreams of mine
Have taken hold, have stolen time
So come insomnia, welcome back
Another night on this sleepless track

Land dwelling creatures occasionally fly
They float on abandoned vessels
Then launch into the sky
Fall back into the ocean
A salty sea wave ride
Too soon altitude sickness sets in
And rain clouds dispel innocent pretenses
Perfect days give way to reality
A daydream ocean inevitably condenses

Hold those steady arms out
Pressure on my skin
And choke the air right out of me
Panicked words locked within

A coffin for the living
Entrapment of the heart
Sleepless, lonely evenings
Spent listening in the dark

To hear your voice speak secrets
Whispered only in the night
“I fear I’m lost forever”
“Come save me from this life”

This hand I hold out shaking
Is not only for your sake
I need this more than ever
Or I will surely suffocate.

Aesthetically speaking
This darkness is ideal
Cascading shadows swallow
A distraction from what’s real

Coldest of breaths inhale
Autumn’s least subtle surprise
October 2:45 AM
Softer memories behind closed eyes

Oh, what it would be like to forget
Taillights faded into dark
What I would trade for a little bit of warmth
In both the weather and my heart.

Time
Careful ticking clock
Enveloped in truths
Here is now but one minute will change
And with it my thoughts rearrange
A cold sweat, awakened on the floor
For what once was constant
Is no more

shadows flitted in and out
indecipherable shapes
the time passed as it does
and while weeks became months
captivated I was
still am
by the flickers of light
and the fire I held
fleetingly
mere moments of bliss
I swore to one day deserve
and I remember every golden night
you splashed water over hands that couldn't let go
and in that moment
your salt skin tasted sweet.