Why am I awake right now?
I most definitely need the sleep that I'm avoiding
But I can't bring myself to sleep alone
I thought these days were past me
But anger brings out the Worst in people
It definitely brings it out in them
And it makes me long to be with you
Right now, I just need you to hold me
To tell me that it'll all be ok
To tell me that you'll never do this to me
To tell me that you Love me and that you'll Always take care of me
Love, I really don't want to be alone tonight but know that I'll be ok
I know I can do this
I feel that strength that only He gives to us
I'm just grateful that He brought us together and that he brought us to him
Thank goodness for the things that make me stronger
For without them, I know I wouldn't be able to withstand the trials to come
Thank you, Father for being my Everything and for always taking care of your children

I  see old words
But have forgotten who they were for
I know of old flames
But cannot remember a thing about them
However, I do remember what I used to be like
Every scar, every tear, every single thing
But I am Not that person anymore
No, I'm not the person I was before
I have her memories, the effects of her tragedy but not the weight of it
All of that pain is gone and in turn so is what I became because of all of that pain
So no, I'm not that person nor do I plan to Ever be again

I do not hide anymore
For I have no fears
I do not cower
For my enemies have no power anymore
I do not put on a mask
Because to Me, I'm Perfect
And I have a man who Loves All of me
He does not only Compliment me
But he also Complements me
Without him, I would be whole but my life would not be anywhere near as Spectacular as it is with him.

Thank you, my Sunshine

Well I for one am happy
The sadness creeps into an abyss
It cannot reach me when I am with you
It will  be forever true
Shakespeare spoke "I have rather loved
and lost than to have never loved at all."
Those are the words embedded in my heart and mind
But I would also rather be in love than despair
And for you have granted me such a courtesy

I even used to doubt my knowledge of love
But I realize it doesn't matter
For love does not know age
and for it does not know mine
So in truth I could know all
As long as I am with someone
Someone who can keep the dark away
And the roses, sunshine and happiness immortal

You've known me for as long as anyone
And we were friends before and now still
One wise old woman told me
that you cannot love what you do not know
And the same goes for hate
In sense you have to know
truly know someone
And how can you know anyone better
than you know your friends

You were there after the first heartbreak
The one that ruined it all
I couldn't bear trying
trying to keep something up like that again
And for a long time I couldn't
Nothing of meaning or note
But that is why I am happy
You were not my first but my second kiss
I couldn't bear to hurt you then
For I was in no shape for a relationship
One so meaningful
With you
So I am entirely thankful that you were and have always been
one of my best friends

Oh how sad my days
How sad they would have been without the two of you
One I've known since I arrived
The other soon there after

My nights would never have been spent
in the early morning hours
I wouldn't have enjoyed two o'clock mornings
in the cold tranquility which was people and noise ridden
All except for us and the best memories to be found
In so humble of a town

Oh how we would have far fewer vendettas
,traditions to keep and fun to be had
If I had never met the likes of you
These many days would never have flown
We would never have become the butterflies we are
And never have found a one eternal love

These days were not meant for soul seeking
But only for finding those who are there
through thick and thin
I'm quite sure that there are none
None who could even attempt to hold a candle to one of you

My dearest friends
A Shark whose dust has blown people away
And a Pink Panther who has never been on TV
I am eternally grateful
that I have found the other two peas to my pod
I love you two, you're the best Siamese twins a girl could ask for
-Love Gator <3

As my patience grows thinner each day
you seem to grow farther away
the distance is outstanding
yet you seem not to notice at all
none do anymore

The life of me was handed
-of all people-to fate
It seems as if a lifetime has passed
even since we spoke
but I remember in the darkest nights
why I wish to be alone
I am incapable and unwilling to tell
the secrets of my heart
yet still I last on
through each insufferable day
because though my heart is weak
my soul will not be handed over
to that of an indecisive, time consuming
and the most torturous of people
Fate has not beat me

Everyday is a challenge I take
but I feel even through the fog
I can still see
though everyone around me
has seen nothing
for as long as they are blind
I will be forever stuck in oblivion
where none see but all can hear
yet none can hear my screams
none can see my tears
none could ever know the pains of my heart
And none could ever understand

For the blind know more than they
only few can even tell I am here
though of all my dearest Hero has seen all
he sees though you are blind
Though you are oblivious to the pain
he sees right through me
he knows me better than I know myself

Since none can see as he does
none know as he does
and neither do you
you have not the slightest clue
that I even am here
yet I am the first he notices
For some days I wish I had more strength
But today I only wish you
and everyone else could see
and then maybe
you could see the true side of me