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112 · Jan 28
fashion trilogy
matt r Jan 28
ive lost what made me special
the constant natter natter natt
the constant feeling that what

i have to say is somehow impo
(r)tent ive lost the annual flore
scence its all for show now its

all for you dont you see! to be
loved is to be changed i think ill
die now i flower in the daylight
112 · Feb 20
guppy lip
matt r Feb 20
i've seen hailstorms collapse
bigger pylons than i.
we stood on the guppy lip
of the ravines
they carved & you threw a stone.

it fell without complaint
and so i followed.
111 · Dec 2024
to:milli
matt r Dec 2024
some guy. some man to find
his, as the old veteran put it
, "special lady" or something.
we're made of the same old
stuff, you & i. the very cotton
that binds us to our shoes and
our shoes to pavement and
the pavement to the sky. in
-verse the slant on what it
means to know how someone
looks after waking up in the
morning. how you feel when
you realise you've been sleep
-ing on a bed of fries and
burger lettuce. when you
accidentally box their nose
blue. you, some cosmic com
panion you turned out to be.
a digital ode to a very good friend of mine.
108 · Oct 2024
incarcinogen
matt r Oct 2024
grab a rib; cage me
     in ur prison; cells divide  
                   to hide; away from you.
some 6am nonsense.
107 · Jan 20
melittology
matt r Jan 20
a low hum like a mouthful
of bees. my love, she sings
like static dives. still, wing
-less and stingless i grab
my net. this apiary is no
home for honey nor sleep.
107 · Dec 2024
10a fm
matt r Dec 2024
people look so silly under the spell
of friday's grooving radio hum:
they trip and fall over miles of tiles
when gin tins leave their shoes untied;
its showtime under the ambergreen lights!

seven o'clock and motor breath
turns to head-seeking missiles, i duck
under a stop where frostbite seeks
to hide its fingers in my socks
"i'm not ready to end!"

"it hasn't yet begun!"
seven twenty and here's my bus!
a giant metal knight with wiper swords
and a two-door parting shield
... i check to see if my feet have healed

engines ruminate over their revolutions
and rumble and grumble on deaf ears
cautionary tales of last week's anteeks...
but not all roads lead to rome, fortunately,
some lead to queen's square

...at least my toes are warm now
102 · Mar 12
moonhooks / rockshine
matt r Mar 12
i ; moonhooks

she shone like an astigmatism

i watched her arms
                              like radiance
  grab each corner of the sky
     & hang it on moonhooks

bleeding,began to melt the day
& i felt her wash
                   down my shoulders

i tasted her then
    & saw her (clearer than ever)



ii ; rockshine

she shone like an astigmatism

in a more
                 wo/rld
                            bre(ak)ing
                      ­                        way

   crystalline, the sky scattered
rockshine like lunar bredcrums
     &    4    one    point    three    
  
   seconds
                  i felt her on my skin
102 · Apr 9
superposition
matt r Apr 9
i do not like this
superposition.
the being here.
there. the every
whereness of
what you do to me.
another ******* i****gram poem
100 · Apr 21
inwater grow
matt r Apr 21
essence of
you/run into
orange blossom

slip, & so
stupidly fall
headlong,loveless

holly blues
metamorphosin'
sh(arp)older blades
99 · Mar 7
hipsful
matt r Mar 7
it's come
& never
left,

always right
beneath the
rough touch;

handfuls
of your
hipsful
& waistful
i hold you
& feel you
and you
feel me like
cigarette
burns.
i like my body when it is with your
98 · Jan 18
sole projector
matt r Jan 18
as i left the cinema pondering loss and trying to tie it to a real anchorable place in the world i walked past a sign that read 'elizabeth banks street' or something. i wondered when it was last given a lick of paint because it was starting to show bare metal around the writing. i forgot about it as i rounded the corner.

the edible i ate before the film grew warm weeds in my bones as i passed a couple on a bench; they'd been there 90 minutes earlier on my way to the cinema. i wondered what they'd chatted about that was worth enduring the cold for. maybe it's like that when you find the one. i thought of the girl at work i have a crush on.

i moved towards the canal and as i counted all the missing cobblestones i danced over the song i was listening to began to swell slowly in my veins. i felt my steps get lighter and wore this unbelievable grin on my face. i thought of the guy i've always wanted to be and how i felt like i was becoming him. i thought of buying a home and owning books and records and how it felt like it was all going to happen. i really felt like i was in exactly the place i was supposed to be at that moment. it was a funny contrast to loss.

my old block of flats sat on the opposite side of the canal a little further down. i slowed a bit and thought of the man i was last year and how proud i am of him. i think i'm a more spiritual man now. i've learned to become a lot more present and appreciate what makes art so beautiful. there's a lived experience reflected in every piece, you see, whether you like it or not. that's what makes art subjective; some people see things they don't want to be reminded of.

so love and growth warmed my leather-laden feet as i turned the final corner into the alleyway opposite my flat. i thought of my new socks and the places they were gonna take me just as i saw a guy hop over a car park fence with a filled bin bag. i wondered if they were his clothes in the bag and if he'd been kicked out by a partner. maybe he'd stolen something. it could be one of a million things but it's another funny contrast to really hoist the moon over my evening. i suppose gain grows from loss like a parasite.
98 · Feb 25
en jaune
matt r Feb 25
"oh! despair is a soft orange glow"

then despair must be climbing my
walls with its springtime grip, see?
no, you sad mope! her name is hope

and she is a soft orange glow casting
spells on my back and i think i might
just wash her hair for her. remember
me when you dip your feet in the sea.
a bit kitsch.
95 · Feb 19
arc de bravais
matt r Feb 19
recall the petrichor of
the porcelain rain, breathe
& let it ring down your
spine. one day you will

be more okay than you're
ever going to be. sleep
then, between the china,
and dream of bluebells.
let me tell you! it's all gonna be okay.
matt r Mar 23
(i feel aqua

/cola

dragged up
by a heavy
stomach
of bubbles)

the in-
tuneness
has always
been new

but here

she is
in her
drowning
way

spinning
me in a
centrifuge
of lipping
waves &
whirlpools
91 · Feb 17
raw wind scarf
matt r Feb 17
you pocket atoms like copper
coins - string me a necklace
to match my raw wind scarf.
"we put on
the raw wind like a scarf"

sylvia plath - love is a parallax
88 · Dec 2024
spacetime trilogy
matt r Dec 2024
the moon bobbed like a lure
rain and other drugs ran off
his coat the whaleskin creak   (s)

like a fishing rod missing the
hook it casted on some z-axis
it gifted a girl the fate of laika

took a vacuum to the beach
we call andromeda the dust
leaked oh aries has a mother
87 · Mar 16
jordie's hip
matt r Mar 16
the soft curve of chance
                              could not bite me

(though sometimes i wish it would)

but fashion a path
                   that takes me to heaven



almost skyward - you
                                      yet equally so
                                             armward

draped head in gold&sunlight with
your planetary blaze

maybe less avessel for life but more
                                           incendiary

electric,plasmic & so not crystalline
despite your form,inspiteof how you
shimmer & dance & fadein&out of it



you are the future i see when i sleep
my temple to your hip

it is my fingertips in yours & on your
it is my lips on yours & my chest on
your chest so flushed&affectionate it
is my legs between your legs & my
knee creeping up inside it is the glow
inside your stomach it is roseblossom
on all your cheeks it is the bitemarks
on your neck & thighs it is my
temple on your hip. it is my temple;

your hip
86 · Dec 2024
obleek trilogy
matt r Dec 2024
end with music like a winestain
wrap a shoulder in reflux dig ur
talkn from ur throat its no good

its question time for the dreamers
is there really such thing as cheez
or is it just some joke im not in on

untuc ur shirt like u walk a churchgoer
whip nocturns back like a duvet o pluto
u infest stronomic beds like bredcrums
exploring nonsense. not that u don't know that.
85 · Dec 2024
limbo trilogy
matt r Dec 2024
shrug the armistice from your
shoulders you little teapot you
brew peppermint rain in vain

in doors we dance like monets
girls i saw you tiptoe into glass
like a still pool of stomach acid

we talk of throwing music out
the window would it be littrin
to play o-love-me-love-me-not?
85 · Mar 8
she turns freeform
matt r Mar 8
she curls out the window
& turns freeform,

into such a thing
                                  like
how i inhale her

,the harsh creamsoothing
of ice water calms

the red light down.
matt r Mar 6
ont blistered walk
aroundt couple

who stood on folds
of nekked geese:

"why oh why wings ???"

let em grow hooks
to throw at trambacks

& ride long past
the cryptid men

who hop

skip

& step

on dirtichor landmines.
make up.
matt r 3d
it is honest in its opalescence.
my love listens
                        to the rising tide
                        & the ebb&flow
my love buries itself in green
                               -bottle sand.

You, with your
                           searching
                           fingers
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~      
, You are missing
from Me.
82 · Mar 5
mean eyed cat
matt r Mar 5
the Mean Eyed Cat climbs My
kittentree legs and says "stay
on theme Man good writers stay
on theme" so i cough a furball
mucusball hairball or skinball
whatever Man im gonna cough
again and again and again
and rid off this Sick Cat ****.
**** breakdown writing. needs to come up though.
81 · Feb 26
drumfill
matt r Feb 26
the rain sways me like a
hymn - some freestyle
jazz drumming melody.
81 · Mar 8
there is space in my
matt r Mar 8
palm        unreserved (by air)
but filled so (like it owns me)

there is space in my

arm             unslept on    
where you (are my) rest

& space in my

shoulder           undreamt &
airgapped (so blancficially)

there is space in my
bed                             

not fate's       (nor maybe's)
but mine's      now (for you

& you                                  

& you                  

& you)
80 · Dec 2024
pixels
matt r Dec 2024
pixels might flicker
to recreate a wavelength ~
but we felt the warmth
78 · Mar 25
eyeful of lip
matt r Mar 25
full-hooded but
not               half
a gleam
        
         an "i know
                   &
                 you
                  don't"

isn't it mysery?
the knowing &
the knowing &
not even doing.

i know.. i should
  formulate
    something.
      really...    like

a song. but not
even the air
can formulate
something
quite so
romantic
enough,

try       write
nonsense like a
kiss.        take
each flavour
of each word
& press it
hard
       against
      ur cheek.

sap.up the warm
meaning like a
thirsty flower you

blossom even
            if you want

i nor the midjune
would ever dare
to      comment.
76 · Mar 26
sink ... sink
matt r Mar 26
sink up & drink your thanks

amberred holymen
               jump
right on                         down
your                 throat



e­very one
      gets given a

         vry own
   homegrown
extinction coefficient

& for that we drink e
                   very
****** ounce we can.
76 · Mar 8
pearloil
matt r Mar 8
the glistening
pearloil
which is You;
incarnate
on my ribbone.
matt r Apr 22
i will weigh
each plasticky
edge
          of
               love

'gainst each soft hand
  & feel their flow
riding finger grooves

find an ego-shaped
              box
(round with       atomic
         what/whereness)
& keep there

wanting More with
      /Her

wanting Such with
      others

so It spills
                       like
honeymilk& sweetness
eyes  (,dilating,)   me

diluting form & fuzzing
hard&fast careening
joy.              in     motion
              &iam     sick

is it newness of This?
is it secret       fizzing
Desire, You, Me for Me
75 · Apr 5
if not bye
matt r Apr 5
then stand      off
your heel ball & kiss
her you fool.    don't
be                don't be

don't just be             .
rupi kaur ur not the only one who can write i****gram poetry
matt r Apr 1
dear you

it'll probably take this a long long time to reach you but isn't that just the idea? nothing is consistent here - moments bend & weave so it feels like each blink takes a lifetime. yesterday a thought took four months to form and i almost used it without thinking.

i'm stretched out on the grass now & i'd love to explain how anyone meets anyone at all. is love some long blue thread bringing them together? i've seen what people do with it - sure they make it into something pretty but it isn't what it's there for. are we wrong to see the long beams of light and only take a photo? is a lick of heat for more than making a cup of tea?

i tried to explain a concept like us to a bumblebee but i didn't really get anywhere. i said "wouldn't you like something like a portal? you could be at the next flower before you know it." i said portal instead of a wormhole because i knew bees didn't understand physics but he buzzed off anyway. i suppose the fun might be in the looking & finding but i've been given flowers before & it sure as hell meant more than picking one myself. maybe he was just happy with what he'd already found.

now i see magpies everywhere but they can't all be you right? i've always thought they were but maybe i'm just too ******* in my long blue thread. i suppose that's human though - i've just always valued the idea of tying something tangible to a concept that isn't really bound by atoms. the idea that this is all meant to be you know?

if you look hard enough you'll see them everywhere. they stick with you like the bluegreen shadow of the sun. sometimes all it takes is one & the thought that everything has to mean something. that's it though - i guess if it were real then you'd be here by now. maybe if you wait long enough you'll miss your chance. maybe if i look long enough a magpie is just a magpie.

p.s.

on the walk here i crossed a bridge - it wasn't celestial or anything but it was high enough off the ground to wonder if i stepped off how much of a joke i could get out my mouth before i hit the clouds. i couldn't really shake that feeling of bending & weaving after that. funny isn't it.

write soon
73 · Apr 11
ergomonics
matt r Apr 11
litheness & long;
her legs entwined
in complication, &

is that not always how
it starts? hoisted less by
rope&more by shoulder

to a point of brilliant
vanity. me&she,the
ego mercenary,eyeing

applesweet, hands on
back & legs entwined
with legs. the excuse to lie

next to me,the instant kiss
& blood hot ***.the almost
going but definitely coming

to our static touchfelt senses.
the long way it's been since
then. the long wait til legs

entwine with legs again.
1 for 2023.
72 · Feb 17
bullet teeth
matt r Feb 17
i'll caress a bullet with teeth
akimbo - to see your navel
skin the moon a button eye.
matt r Apr 15
i am found in love with you

in constellations hot
likeawish,
        burning
        &cascading 'gainst
the outline of romance,

stargazer,you

watch his arms hold her
& pushes her spine
into him
               contouring
swooning heart & bullet
breathing
                 'gainst her neck

take your eyes
                            as fireflies
in the humidity of dance
& come entangled in it

realise the melting of day
& fade in,so take me. i am less
        than a galaxy away

& that is so why i love you
matt r 2d
(only eight weeks later)

re enveloped,(no)O(bow)
so folded hemispherically;

flaking,    crumbing,    Love.
it is bouyant in its optimism

& so flighty to jump the
next slated crosswind

to the 'zeroconnection
                         terminal'

in the next twin city. She is
insoluble in Me as in paper.
64 · Mar 25
lower case g
matt r Mar 25
the living in shoes

make us all so
thoughtful&bright

make us see
god in the wall
under footfall of

tenebrescence

light stamping
its pinhole feet

is god is
our god &
my god too.
matt r Dec 2024
'& its stalking me round the bend' i think,
'in its wicked hitchhiker boots.'

we ride the silence for a minute, watching
how the frost runs on passing fields
like melting morning breadcrumbs.

a pothole breaks the illusion with a jolt:
"its only two more stops" it coos.
i scoff, 'what more is a stop than an integer?'

my last one was dark, and sleet poured
through my collar and climbed up
through my socks; i was freezing.

the next one may be laced with ice,
black fishing holes for gullible shoes,
no more welcoming than before.

'how long is the bit in between?' i pose,
"liminality is invaluable" it muses in reply,
so the clouds play tag, and a sunbeam shines through.

slowing, a hydraulic hiss fills the valley.
a derelict bothie slumps in the farm over, still
there lands a crow on the chimney, still too;

'goodbye' i mutter, 'and thank you
for making me soup, and fixing my blankets,
and thank you for landing here, now.'

a caw and the engine roars back to life,
the crow takes flight and disappears
into the bones of a grandmother elm tree.

'just one more stop', hums its voice
like a scarf, 'will you get off here with me?'
i massage a knot from my neck.

the sunset gave me a step to the sky
and i rode the rolling linearity
of the horizon as a zipline

to here, a place called blind fear
where its cold hand, outstretched
stuffs the brisk morning air into its pocket.
i've been listening to a lot of phil elverum.
64 · Mar 7
sureline
matt r Mar 7
peach-fuzz,remedy
my touch. i have
dreamt of it;
read of it
since your
eyed-good,bye.
been reading.
matt r 5d
is a slender beauty. the
    sideways stance of
'i hope it does not
                     touch me'
(it does,though). love,
with its perfect
               nail beds &
finger knuckles.
   She will reach you
      all the same.

there is a fatness to it,
too;    
    a lying roundness
who wills She/will not cut
you. She is scarletred &
  lives in you;She is
  who you call 'living'.

reservoiry in its
volume,
               fill my lungs
time&time over. fill
  every saucer,gilded
&unstolen, replace my
air with it. She does
   not breath colourless,
but has the flow
                  of water.

in the word,'love' is
the recurring curl of
love,
&love
&love
again.
            She is the end
             & everywhere,
if i could only see Her.
63 · Apr 7
sanctimony
matt r Apr 7
o holy glow,
                  your pitch
eared knell.
                  the blue ish
halo hooped through lobe.

what do you call these "larger
deaths?" weighted deaths
                    /important deaths?

you ring these
deaths 'hind
eyes & throat

to samaritans &
moonwanderers?

no. so quiet as such like
a second post-homily

& therein lies the body, see;
   the rotting hipocrisy
          of expiration

                    ...

therein lies the flowery
bigot, or death as no
       inferno for
               consequence.
61 · Mar 16
obsequious maybe
matt r Mar 16
run along           the fibre
sticks to your shoes
like grass            the idea
fills your head like
chlorophyll

so i'm greeneyed, but do
you blame the sequoia
(obsequious, maybe)
for the redwoody
want for water?
matt r 6d
of Me, i hope
    the sagging moon
         & her tired hands
   fall on Your shoulders
to wash in how I see You

i hope
  the delicate dried
           flower
     & her springly laugh
  realises You love Me

i hope
    the singing magpie
& his warbling tone
     echoes the songs
  in which I played You

i think
     i hope You hope
           i Am
matt r 4d
'i really like you' is not all it is,
more     bellyful&hearty in its way.
so 'love' is a scary thing to call it,
no? i think Love is kindly&honest.
'the jordiness of it all'; You are like
music i will never hear, or fashion
  i will never wear. You, always
                                         'not quite'.

yet You are hot, notcold, & Love is tall
'the jordiness of it all' is newness
& i believe We are not over yet ...
           so silly,call me in love & crazy,
You are beautiful,sweet& notyetmine,
You are,everything,but mine. as You are
in Love with him, I am in Love with You.
a sonnet (kinda) x
matt r Apr 22
unrhyming in the jilty way                      i am
never stepping how You weave flowersome

(chalky Moon she can not finger into
/liquid Sun her molten gold    will,dryup)
the ground,
   each flowersome heel You softsoap
into charming new Somethings,
                                              lifely green

no setting - kinda jellylike - the eve
will forges on in her shimmery way
(& birdsong is similarly shimmery)
lasting forever like lifetime of bees
,hopefully,
                  or preserved in petalwrap
(& it is You   giving the time its tick)

You are in rhyming with the Universe
so hum in the       softly folds of music.
a sonnet (sorta)
matt r Apr 9
yesterday i watched a comet sail right over the handrail of calmess i watched it again eddy the starry pool of stomach acid & i realised that is just what comets do it is such a thing to realise it is another thing to feel it hot in your gullet not burning white or red but more a perfect green like the perfect green you see behind your eyes i think know where itll go too ive let this comet pass by two or three times before and its nowhere near here it won't destroy any ecosystem or create any new flame itll just taper past again&again&again losing a little bit of mineral again&again&again until it is little more than a rock. then again i was told never to focus on what i can fit only in the palm of my hand.
56 · Apr 4
in the square
matt r Apr 4
in square retaliation;
the sunhot riot against
repose!
men draft their perfect
                         manifestos
to platonic jeers & "i know
& yes buts-"
                       seething melt
         ed jaws clenched shut.

more stop, there's more than
quiet anger. there's chatters
natters  less tireless flattering
words; true joy is bred
                  here on tarmac beds...

bell boys & horn heads & maraca
shoe sole songs,     carabiner cords
& their unknown composers jangle
walk the way to fame! let but spoken
time unravel her silent duskful flame

in square retaliation,
riot the moon reclaim.
a 5 minute one
, set all too soon
matt r 7d
mind.          like a
      twirling,sweeping breeze,
We would be
    swanning up the coastline
    of some
         sweet&birdsung
                       place

(eating up candlelight,
    stalking halated joy,
walking the long walk,
talking of how We love

under such
         a giggling evening)

if i could sway Your
mind.                 like a
             flowing wave dips
             the coral,
He would hold His luck
         like a clamshell,dashed
         upon His rocks of fault
& left to saltly dissolve in sea

(Pearlescently, You
may roll around my
fingers.  come alive
under my jolting/
                   lectric
touch & realise my
riveting certainty)

if i could sway Your
mind.       like a
    flourished page turning,
         You would read more
    than
just the words I write

(lungfuls of effervescent love,
exhale,eye it melt across the sky
& drip down Your shoulders,
play the magpies kizmit tune)

if I could sway Your
mind like a tree,
You would fall into love
                                   &Me
matt r Dec 2024
a matter of wordy limbs reaching
a matted head: is it a bastion
of desire to compose itching
prose? is it retaliation?
or simply a new direction
set out by a compass bewitching
earth's gullible deforestation?
just nonsense wearing a wishing
well's wiry wig of its intention
to bury its skull in muddy ditching
just words, really. muddled!
matt r 5d
this pissedup drawl of an evening
was    just that;
                       stumbling. through
                            time&nausea
as Someone You could only cry.

high &notquite
                         dry,I
slipped into our music like silk
                                          in sleeves
& think about all the pretty notes i
left you.    think about your hand
                                         on my knee
                  (that one time,"accidentally")

so in sleep as life,
       in my dream i dreamt of kissing You.
in Your,flushing gleam, & weaving voice
i dreamt of Your dream,
               of how You
                   want me
                   holding You.
do you remember Your dream
the one          you told Me?
the one in which i held You?

do you remember your dream
& the             kismet of We?
the  wish that i would kiss You    x
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