Clinging ...onto...your...ledge
Gripping ... tight
The pain... Chasing through my fingers
As I try to hold on to what little of you I still grasp
The tightness... In my arms
As I try to be strong

The struggle - I need to be stronger, I need to get a grip, I need to pull myself up to your level, be a man, be stronger, forget the pain, get this man up, this man up, man up, man up, MAN UP!!! Are you a man or mouse?!?!
Hold tight. Fight. Look into the light
Of your eyes

Then let go...
...And fall
       ....Floating ....through the air...
Watching you drift ... away into the distance
And the vacuum ...     created by my fall ...
         ...Thins my oxygen
                   ...Dulls my pain and fear...
   ...And I look around me
And notice the beauty and freedom that I had forgotten ...
While I was clinging on ... to you
... Stretching out over miles ... I see endless possibilities ...
But one possibility strikes me most of all
I will crash
I will break
I will pull myself to pieces
I'm not strong enough to survive this fall!!

Then I notice
All the other people falling
Some faster... Some slower... Some further away... Some closer to the crash
Way, way above me,
in the distance,
are 3 small people,
fluttering and playing,
enjoying the freedom in the air,
relishing the experience of the fall.
Not worrying about the crash.
Just enjoying the view.

And I watch them play happily,
unaware and unaffected by the fall,
And all I'm thinking of for now is them,
As I continue my journey toward whatever may be...

Gav called me up.
Him and Tolly were going out to Never Never Land in Blackburn
3 lost boys off on a curious adventure

All I wanted to do were stay in and play Championship manager and drink Ribena.
I were a slow starter int' drinkin' scene
Mi mum and dad had bought us a tiny bot'le o' mead once on 'oliday
Took mi about 2/3 years to drink it
Another time I had 2 or 3 cans at Gavs
Blacked out
Set off t' t' taxi wi'out mi shoes on
"2nd Star t' t' reet and straight on t' t' moornin'!"
Then puked out o' t' taxi windo'

But I went
Mi mum dropped me off at Gavs 'ouse ont' Shad estate
Gav got us a coke before we caught t' bus in
But 'e sprinkled in some white pewder
"What's this? Pixie dust?"
"It's something to give you Speed" said Tolly
"just drink it!" Said Gav

(At this point in this poem, it's starting to sound like I were on the verge of some cool, coming of age experience. But Gav were only a naive little lad and it turned out he'd been sold crushed paracetamol)

So we caught bus
Waitin' for t' affects o' t' artificial amphetamine
'N' we got t' Neverland
No mermaids 'ere
No pretty ***** girls
There were a few blokes wi dodgy eyes
But no no, no-n-no no, no-n-no no no no there's no pirates!
Just ****** plastic Palm trees
'N' townies in fluorescent nylon shirts
No peacock feathered hats ere
There hair were all steps or curtains
(I was sporting a rather fetching home cut hair style wi no gel and my neatly ironed school shirt with the top button fastened)

Didn't kno' what to do about this weird scenario
T' girls and t' boys weren't stood on opposite sides at this party
They were all in t' t' middle
****** loads on 'em
And they were doing some sort o' side stepping thing that I found later were called dancin'
I sort o' skirted round edges feelin' scared
Then went to sit at sides on an empty table 'n' hid

On t' next table were a nice lookin' couple o' blokes.
They must o' bin good mates!
They were cuddlin' 'n' touchin' each other a lot.
Anyhow, thi got talking t' mi
Told 'em I'd not bin out before
"Ow old are you lad? 14/15?"
"I'm 18"
Thi sort o' laughed, dunno why
Then one of 'em offered me a cucumber sandwich
I thought t' mi sel'
"I dunno much about nightclubs but I dunt think folk normally bring cucumber sandwiches!"
But I were 'ungry so I ate it
Then I think 'e thought we were mates coz 'e were touchin mi leg
I 'ad to crow for me mates
Then Gav came in like Peter Pan and rescued mi and we set off for 'ome

I went to t' phone box n' called mi mum
Didn't know town reet well
So I waited for 'er outside o' mi school
There were some scary looking people on one side o't' road snappin at each other like crocodiles
So I stood under t' lamppost so I were int' light an' t' cars passin could see mi
Felt safer like that
Tick tock tick tock
The crocodiles were lurkin
Each time a car passed I stepped out a bit
To look for mi mum
Drivers kept lookin at mi nervously and drivin off
Maybe thi thought I were a crocodile too
But they also kept smirking at mi
Then some cops pulled up
Made us stand again t' wall
'N' searched mi
Asked us if I were rentin
"Rentin' what? I'm Waitin for mi mum."
"Aye cap'n Hahaha I'm sure you are! Dressed in your tight little hot pants!"
"These aren't 'ot pants, they're chinos?!"
Then mi mum turned up an said "oh aye! This streets t' red light district!"
"Well ****** me!"

Never, never again... Until uni happened

I want to catch a butterfly.
A pretty little butterfly,
Delicate, Beautiful, curving, intense, vibrant.

But not trapped in a net.
She chooses my rough hand,
Rather than a rich flower to provide for her.
Not a conservative or vain butterfly.
Not one that flutters around you,
But has an aversion to touch.

A butterfly that longs to be admired,
In all her beauty,
Only by me.
To land on MY hand,
Let ME stroke her wings,
With rough, sullying fingers.
Beckoning me,
With her soft fluttering,
And as I stroke,
Opening willingly to my touch.

Just a little at first,
Sensitive and nervous,
But as I respond with care
To her beckoning colours,
She opens wide,
So I can caress her delicate, vulnerable wings,
And play.
Until her colours stain my hand,
And she is tired,
And we rest together.

My ***** little butterfly.

Tick tock
Tick Tock
It's late
tock Tick  
tock Tick  
I'm wired
Tick
I'm tired
Tock
I'm wired I'm tired I'm tired I'm wired
Tick-tock tock-tick
Tick tock tickety tock  
tickety tick tickety tock
Shut up
Shut up
Shut up-shut up
shut the **** up
you stupid fu-cking clock
I'm tired
I'm wired
If I don't get some sleep I'll get fired
Tick-tock tock-tick
Tick tock tickety tock  
tickety tick tickety tock
Shut up
Shut up
Shut up-shut up
shut the **** up
you stupid fu-cking clock
Some sleep
Can't sleep
My mind
Just creeps
Just blind
Count sheep
Do'n't work
Each peep
Alert
Can't sleep
Create
Won't sleep
And think
Don't sleep
Excite
**** sleep
**** sleep!
**** SLEEP
Tick-tock tock-tick
Tock-tick tick-tock
Tick tock tickety tock  
tickety tick tickety tock
Shut up
Shut up
Shut up-shut up
shut the **** up
you stupid fu-cking clock
Alarm
Goes beep
Oh well
No sleep
Need sleep
**** work
I'll sleep

That day we went to the beach
And you brought a suitcase
And a tie
Because you loved Mr Bean
And you loved Mr Benn
Bidderbin and Bidderben
And me and your mum
We talked about the water
The waves
Our shoes
Our trousers
Should we?
No towels or trunks
But you loved Bidderben
And you knew Bidderben was an ordinary fellow, with an ordinary life in an ordinary suburban house
But when Bidderben goes into the changing room and puts on the outfits amazing and extraordinary adventures happen
And when we turned around
Still undecided
You had transformed
Into a tiny little Bidderbin
With no clothes on
Doing your funny walks
And your ***** bouncing in the sun
Reminding us all how to have fun

My little nut

My little nut is no ordinary nut
She's small like a nut
She's starting to sprout
She's so eager to reach the clouds
But with her roots firmly in the ground
When people see my little nut, they say
"Isn't she beautiful, isn't she bright?!
Are you sure she didn't fall from a different tree?!"
My little nut skips
My little nut makes me skip
My little nut makes my heart skip
My little nut calls me a poo head
And I poo on my own head
And I'm made of poo
But she doesn't mean it
It's just coz she's a little nut
My little Hazel nut xxxx

An online dating conversation I had...

Rabbits or robots?
1 choice only
Detailed explanation required

                                                                     Rabbits

Explain please
(P.S. You're pretty)

I reckon robots would win in a fight

Unless it was a battle of cuteness

But I'm not really sure how a cuteness battle would work?

Some kind of dance off I expect

The rabbit would shake it's little rabbit tail

The robot would... Do the robot

The robot would lose points for originality

Plus bunny tails are cute

Robots don't have tails

Unless it's a robot bunny

                             Hahaha, I've got an image in            
                             my head! You're bonkers!

** do you think would win a fight between a robot bunny and a bunny with robotic limbs?

Who

Not **

That's disrespectful to women

Unless they are actually a *******

Then it's just a statement of fact

Although that's probably not a PC term

They probably prefer ****** creation officer or something

But **** them... stupid '**'s

                                Well, I'm glad I'm not a
                                *******! Ur crazy!

Hi, I'm Matt, I prefer "creative"

Crazy isn't PC

Plus I'm fit, which makes crazy ok.

And clever

And funny

And amazing in bed

I sleep like a pro

Ive been practising every night for years!

No wet beds or anything

Well...

Not often

                      I'm actually laughing out loud! X

Sometimes it just warms you up a bit when it's cold

                        You sound very interesting and
                        Good at a lot of things

You're cute

I fancy you

I'm going to pull your hair and chase you round the playground

                                        You make me laugh
                                        And you're cute too
                                        And very very cheeky
                                        Msg me later?

Sorry, I've got to watch a dance off between a robot rabbit and a rabbit with robotic limbs, seeing as you didn't answer my question :(