there
                                               that's why i can never seem to totally despair

if you
are


happy


and you
know
it


clamp your hams

i feel much safer with animals
than people, i tend
to close off
when i'm scared
of crowds
or
another human being
and
what's going to happen
in an encounter
that is real
and somewhere along the deathbeds
i forgot any other way to be
i guess it is the unreal i'm afraid of

life seems long, it's not
real or nothing
that's all i can survive
silence i can do
but true
silence
not the silence
barb-wired
with lies

denial cannot keep death away
and in the meantime
suffocates life
god has gotten this
longtime prodigal-thief,
petri dish
of strange
and deadly
parasites,
ready to be
alive

ready to be part of a revolution
of values, a conversation
of justice, a
consciousness
of peace
and
love

despair
and fear-of-failing
have broken my legs and back and neck
for long enough,
i do everything
knowing
i will fail

and that's okay
because you know
this really is not about me,
not at all

i'm ready to be happily lost
in the jungle of life
because i am
happily found

life

does not
happen
in
a

drive-by

death does

yo

we have always
been the crocodile
twins of tears

tears
are
not

male
female
straight
gay
young
old

free

b


efore   i
formed
y
o
u

in
the
wo
mb

i
k
n
e
w

y
o
u