I keep telling myself our love is like
a lake in winter; cold to the touch but
beneath the ice is dormant life
waiting to reawaken

And on its surface are both ballerina
figure skaters poised with perfection and
toddling children  wearing scrapes like
first place medals

Sometimes the surface cracks and out
pours freezing entrails and watery
remembrance - but now is no time for
nostalgia. The lake scabs over with
persistent breaths from the father-wind
and winter's secrets are secured

Some things are best left forgotten
until the season is right

But I know our spring will soon come
melting away the frozen crust and turning
skaters into swimmers as the Divine Sun
breathes life into our slumbering hearts

Darling, we're reaching the surface now
I guess you could say we're together
again. And though you're sitting here
right beside me, you feel pretty far away

Every time we're pieced back together
from broken hearts and torn up memories
the original picture seems to fade

We're all tape, glue, and staples
with false, empty I-love-yous
Our laughter is more forced
and your hands are colder than
I remember

You remind me of a cut-out with
flat eyes and a pasted smile
but we eat breakfast together every
morning just like a TV couple

You know how I like my coffee
and that's enough to keep you here

you don't mind the glass beneath your feet
or the bomb strapped to your chest
ticking second by second like your very own
metronome trying to harmonize the noise
inside your head

the gag inside your mouth feels real to you
but no one steps aside to help you untie
the purpled hands behind your back

and you wonder why no one can see
all the pretty girls strung to banisters
with their lipsticked mouths gaped with
muted screams and mascaraed eyes
bulged by Death's medusa-gaze

at the top of the staircase is a noose with
your name - Jane

and as you tiptoe up the steps, the faces
of the corpses blend and coalesce
into one generic image - a girl no one
remembers beyond her death - and you
realize once your neck snaps you're nothing
more than a statistic

the rope tightens and you join
the data set - the only place you've
ever felt you belonged

And it seems I will only see your face behind glass
As you turn yourself away from my beckoning
Muted like a songbird with a gouged throat and
Broken wings - my hands press against the wall and
I envision the last time we touched

The shackles on my ankles feel heavier as
I imagine eclipsing the space between our bodies
The bruised, maroon stripes across my back
Swell like a prisoner's garb and bright blood
Spills from my mouth; the color of your favorite wine

I know now the world has no room for treachery and
I can feel the temptations march beneath my feet
As I fall to my knees with a beseeching scream
The gods wrap their warm fingers around my limbs
Dissolving me back into the mother-earth where
One day, I will meld with you again

When I first met you,
I thought you were the one
But as the months wander by,
Everything's become undone

You can make me laugh and
You can make me cry
I don't always return your phone calls
And I really can't say why

I guess you could say we're
Two bad actors with unrehearsed lines
We're an off-tempo duet but we pretend
Everything is fine

I threw out the snapshots and mix CDs
After our fight last week, I'm sorry
I guess I realized I liked you more
When I'm dreaming

You said you could marry a girl like me
And I just laughed

I met her at church
before we gave up god and
started kissing girls

I tear through cobweb-curtains
in the attic of my mind and gather
dusty memories and things long lost
I never thought I'd find

Delicately, I collect old photos
of forgotten smiles and love letters
that once set my heart alight
and broken lamps, love-stitched quilts,
worn cookbooks with my mother's
notes, and my trusted, rusted trike

I pack them in a cardboard box with
a smile and a wish, and with pride
I tie a balloon for every year of my life
and watch the memories rise

As the box wanders into the clouded
arms of the blue father-sky,
the shackles on my ankles are undone
and as I take weak steps like a newly mobile
fawn, I know that I am free and my
haunting is now gone