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Sep 2014 · 1.6k
Axel
martin challis Sep 2014
Axel, who never had a rocking horse, once rode a bright blue tricycle. He called it his ‘Athenian Rhapsody’. He loved to play the tuba in bed, and when he was feeling particularly happy, would sit on the loo in the outside shed, pants around his ankles oompa-pa’ing till the cows came home.

That was quite a while ago; the tuba and the tricycle have gone, yet he can still hear the triangle sound the bell made on his tricycle, and still remembers the scraping of the old keys on the ancient tuba.

Axel listens to old sounds very well (all the time): he loves Bach, Mendelssohn and Donovan. He loves to eat crumpets with honey and drink a large white mug of milky tea; it reminds him of summer fishing trips to Lake Eucumbine, mushrooms and gnats in the full-sun morning air, (he loves to talk fishing when he’s playing chess with Carl the orderly, often quoting from his favourite magazine, ‘Modern Fly Fishing’).

Axel was once an expert at fly fishing; tying the ‘super moonshadow’ to perfection (he named the fly after what he thought was a Donovan song, written by Cat Stevens).

When the hospital staff remember to buy him a new box, Axel loves to drink Lady Grey tea made from tea bags, he prefers tea bags, he feels that somehow they bring clearer definition to tea making.

Axel thinks a lot about definition, noting how the edges of his bed are very clearly defined by the clean-blue hospital blankets that drop suddenly to the ocean of the grey linoleum floor. He likes the smell of cleanblue, it’s somehow a new sea to sail and sometimes the feel of his favourite jumper when he was a boy: a definite edge of beginning and end. He knows that soon he’ll cross the floor-grey ocean, sailing under a white sheet. But this is not a thing Axel dwells on for very long, he prefers to think of such things as his next chess move and flirting with Miriam the night nurse.



Axel has just beaten Carl in a game of chess. He’s said goodnight to Miriam, a long quiet goodnight, a good long, good night. He won’t wake again, he senses this  –  and is peaceful.

When his last breath comes he hears; a faint scraping sound and a single precious note from a triangle bell on a bright blue tricycle.

They’re good sounds.

They are old sounds.

They bring him…
Sep 2014 · 1.7k
Grass
martin challis Sep 2014
Sedge
Rush
Cereal
Turf

Blade
network
Insect
canopy

Viral
fibre
­Pattern
weaver

Earth
fabric
Meadow
aquifer

Wind
dancer
Tribal
m­ind
Aug 2014 · 232
Away to the Silence
martin challis Aug 2014
As the fire subsides
into furnacing embers
And the ocean’s voice washes
in from across the field
Making ready for sleep
you offer a glass of peppermint tea
and wish for us a restful goodnight

In evening’s air, in night time’s breath,
we sip and without word listen to
the crickets rhythmic and persistent as they
chorus at the perimeter of shadows and stars,
to the gentle ones at rest on their perches
each with an eye on the moon
who call or croon at irregular intervals,
to the ageing house who creaks as she
shifts her shoulders
from one side of night to the other

Then from a gentle kiss
and a last wish of goodnight
we turn from this to ebb
away to the silence
away to the sea
of sleep


MChallis @ 2014
Aug 2014 · 270
I Let You Pass
martin challis Aug 2014
To my dead son or daughter;
I left you, let you pass,
kept you out

frozen: The mark of
the palmist foretelling five children,
I climb this hill now, with four at my side.

Your memory: A shadow on the distant range,
where eucalypt is  to its last;
the blue mountain.

Though I climb and four grow,
the wife that was then is now gone;
her grief and her echo.

Still I sense the soft pad of your call,
the tug of your passing,
and almost
the first breath of greeting.



*MChallis 2006
Aug 2014 · 187
what is God
martin challis Aug 2014
inspecting momentarily
the visiting sulphur-crested cockatoos
leave our pine-tree for another, further down the hill

en masse, they fly towards and just above us,
their screeches, loud and unmistakeable
are full of enthusiasm and intent

some, slightly smaller in size, are silent
I wonder if they’re the understudies of the chorus
closely following flight-lines of their elder’s character and bravado

these beautiful creatures, so independently defined
raise a cacophony that exhilarates
every fibre of the soul and fills the heart with laughter

self-less, expanding and enraptured
I briefly lift to the massing of their flight:
a complete and joyful glimpse, of full participation
*for sophie and for ollie*
Jun 2014 · 1.2k
Saigon Battle Children 1972
martin challis Jun 2014
While i was learning to savour the new taste of cashew and walnut in the autumn of that year
you were learning to eat the bones of your neighbours' dog as you fled from an earth gone moist
the leaves of war were torn from the jungle as a cavalry of shrapnel burnt away the air
you were learning to hold your breath while i was doing the same in a suburban swimming pool

when the dust of your family filled the lids of your eyes
being left to see for yourself held quite a different meaning
while your skin seared from the heat of warfire
i was feeling the warmth of a shopping centre in winter

when you went without feet, a landmine exploding your underneath world underneath
i sprained an ankle at basketball
the words of an american god spat forth from an automatic weapon
and you saw the tongues of the lamb inviting you to feast in a foreign language

and while i drew in crayon on the kindergarten wall
you were drawn in the crosshairs just before the smell of cordite
Used as a lyric by Elixir
May 2014 · 524
My Companion
martin challis May 2014
For Pamela*

True love is my companion
She guides me in delight
She whispers all the names for love
With soft attending might

True love is my companion
A swirling heart of one
A blaze of pure intention
An illuminating sun

True love is my companion
She dreams beyond my dreams
She is where the compass points
And all that's in between

She is sunlight bathing
A soothing gentle breeze
Water from the mountain
Harmony and ease

True love is my companion
As gentle as the dove
Within the heart's dominion
My companion true, is love
For my mother Pamela 1928-2011 who taught me how to love and lead from the heart.
May 2014 · 239
The Words
martin challis May 2014
when it's time to write the words again
they come one by one
filing in through an opening,
it might be that they've waited patiently
for a right time or an invitation
but not always
I like it best when they rush in, fervently needing attention

hearing them coming, I
lift my head
and with a certain kind of tightness in the belly
begin to place them quickly,
carefully
in order or progression, to
ensure that for the reader,
they carry meaning

from time to time I
go back to the beginning of a line
and review the order
review the syntax
the scansion
the metre
or perhaps re-order or re-use or remove one or two
as necessary

repetition can be a feature of this process
as sometimes words
want to come in twos, pairs
or repeated phrases,
to create emphasis;

and of the words upon arrival
I marvel as they move a line
to connect and weave and work to
lift from the page a story

as a poem
as a promise
as a possibility
Apr 2014 · 274
When He Says...
martin challis Apr 2014
When he, Wei Wu Wei, says...

Why are you unhappy?
Because 99.9 per cent
Of everything you think,
And of everything you do,
Is for yourself -
And there isn't one.


How do you respond?
What is your mind doing right now?
What do you set yourself free from?
Apr 2014 · 354
Equipoise
martin challis Apr 2014
Neither this nor that
A perfect in between
A single breath
The simplest stance
The compression of a universe
into one point
The expansion of a universe
into all points
A noun for oneness
An infinite stillness
An experience
of now.


                                                    Martin­ Challis 2014
Feb 2014 · 961
Enact
martin challis Feb 2014
When i act to heal myself
I act to heal the world

When i act to heal the world
I act to heal myself
Feb 2014 · 1.1k
The Experience
martin challis Feb 2014
Whatever experience you are having
Know that, it too shall pass.

Know that at times it will be okay to be not okay
And that, this too shall pass.

Within every experience
something will be there for you.

It will either touch the truth of who you are
Or it will ask you to look closer to find that truth.

On looking, the truth of who you are will draw closer
With patience, with acceptance, with courage, with love, with practice, you will touch it but not hold it.

Whatever experience you are having,
It too shall pass.
Feb 2014 · 339
I Watch Her Sleep
martin challis Feb 2014
Morning

Soft light

And light sleeping

She sighs and lifts
and sighs and falls


Her breath
the gentleness of day beginning

I sit and watch her

more lovingly
than a child could
Feb 2014 · 355
Music in the Magic
martin challis Feb 2014
music in the magic in the mystery
of softness in the footsteps
that your voice takes
to the place within my heart

brings a secret fascination
for intrigue's imagination
where enchantment chords a yearning
willing obstacles to part

but if the music is discordant
or I'm drowning with the tides
fear is overpowering
for the little one who hides

yet with childish laughter promising
the joy of trusting smiles
I wonder for the soft heart
set free from all denials

I wonder for the joy of things
as they bubble as they soar
and I wonder for the song of love
on the path of evermore

music in the magic in the mystery
of softness in the footsteps
that your voice takes
to the place within my heart
Feb 2014 · 259
Just Now
martin challis Feb 2014
When you are where you are
Just there
And not elsewhere
Not spinning
Or toppling
But steady
Ever steady
In the breath of being
You are
Just now my darling
A universe at it's centre
A wondrous
Infinite now
Feb 2014 · 276
It is the Time
martin challis Feb 2014
It is the time for love
Of course it is
What a thing to say
When is it not that time?

Perhaps it is never more
Never has been more
Than now
Yet somehow we wait
Wait for what?

Wait for a higher authority?
When there is none to wait for
Wait for permission?
When it's there to give ourselves all along
Wait for someone else to go first?
When we are that someone.

Now more than ever
Is the time
For love, for
The telling
The giving
The living of it

Now
martin challis Sep 2013
With the first awareness of morning
I sense the kind of clarity elusive
at other times of day.

She is a singular breath, formless,
offering insight into the endlessness
of something pure.

Yet she moves away as thoughts come:
those dissenting armies that ***** in
to involve me in the containment of opposites.

She will not be held in place by argument.

I long for her when she leaves.

My intention is to attend to her when I’m able.
To be the gardener who loves the flower.

That she might touch me when she will
That she might find me, often

In the gentleness of contemplation.
Sep 2013 · 249
As One
martin challis Sep 2013
Within and beyond
your self
is another
self

And other selves
within and beyond again

Within and beyond
your self
are all selves

All beyond
and within
as one.
Aug 2011 · 1.1k
Drown in the Blue Sky
martin challis Aug 2011
Drown in the blue sky
the blue sea
the green land
and all the while, white waves, of wash,
cloud or smoke arising, and
on this rock I am every particle
I can see, and more than I am,
none of this, and separate is
my life a paradox continuum
inexplicably explained as
stable passing impermanence, and
if I could drown in the blue sky
I would do it flying.
martin challis © 2011
Aug 2011 · 845
He Was Big On Tea
martin challis Aug 2011
A little empty that morning
she sat on the top step
of the verandah
sipping tea, sipping thought.
Three steps down to the pavement
squares of sandstone
lay in even handed rhythms;
flatly refusing to contour.

He’d moved away last week; big bloke, big smile
could clasp four pavers in one hand,
laid the lot inside ten days,
maybe a record, who could say.

Completed, the pavement was now empty of him,
no more scraping back, no more chipping out,
no more broad smiling hands
reaching for her cups of tea.

She missed this; as she missed the slightly flat renditions of
‘midnight oil’ and ‘fleetwood mac’, the **** of his straw hat
and the farewell call of... "see you sometime in the morning suze..."
(always at exactly 6.30 a.m.)

He was big on tea,
said he was glad
to meet someone who knew it
wasn’t merely the dis-colouration of milk.
She’d smile at that, he was right,
things like tea were best, given time to infuse.
She sipped her tea, sipped her thoughts
and the deeper taste that came with a little time.
Martin Challis © 2011
www.martinchallis.com
Aug 2011 · 760
A Choice
martin challis Aug 2011
A change of mind
a change of heart
a step this way
or that
a moment held
or given
a step away from light
naive or dark.

Is choice
an invitation
and if so
by whom
or what?

Those million
thoughts that lead to actions
now or
down the track:
and then this
what if that
to pick up
to put down
to left to right
to leave to stay
and on until
a path or paths are found
or trod
or followed.

If everything is choice
what is not
- to step from instinct to intuition
- to love my wife
- to love my children
- to love the god of life
- to write this.

The barometer of
heart
the judge and jury of
the mind
the guides
the angels
assisting
and the thoughts
that tend to lead
to actions
that tend to lead
to feelings
that tend to lead to more
thoughts which sometimes
are discoveries
that tend to lead
to choices
down the track.

The map of my life
can be seen
by turning
my head to the south.
With the benefit
of hindsight
I see I am and have been
passenger and pilot
messenger and message
drawing and drawn
but with this
I must ask
is it that I am also
a choice
and if so
by whom?
martin challis © 2011
www.martinchallis.com
martin challis Aug 2011
The three of you
waving your brave little hands,
smiling love and mischief at me
through the tinted glass
of the big green bus.

I’m standing tight to the kerb
screaming at the concrete
as I smile
waving back with gusto.
‘I love you ‘
mouthed in silence
‘have I failed you?’
a silent question.

I wave until you’ve turned the corner -
gone in a juggernaut like
stolen children;
the street where we laughed
only a minute ago
now more empty than a new coffin.

I walk back to the car knowing we will go through this
again and again
- every time you visit for the weekend.
martin challis © 2011
www.martinchallis.com
Aug 2011 · 1.0k
Olympic Colour
martin challis Aug 2011
There were painter’s clouds that day;
broiling, tumbling,
moving inner silence across an easel.

Beneath them
a concrete mind mixed and etched
one long brush-stroke:
the tarmac before us.

Excited engines carried us along
and carried by us
an air befriended...
with the convertible top thrown down
your hair streamed
olympic colour; a spectrum of extraordinary.
You threw back a sunrise laugh,
the wind and all else
belonged to exhilaration.

The horizon captured another sky,
a mist-green hail filled sea; a quiet litany.

A pallet knife scratched its lightening
and the danger of no potential
that kept us moving on.
Martin Challis © 2011
www.martinchallis.com
Aug 2011 · 923
Black Vacuum
martin challis Aug 2011
I put my lips to your face
and **** in old skin.
Your face changes colour.
Becomes pink with new complexion.

Your mother calls.
You can’t tell her about this.
Instead you tell her ten, for coffee.

After coffee. At shopping. She remarks,
'my daughter is so very beautiful.’
The salesman nods in agreement.
She purchases a new appliance.
It matches the colour of everything;
it's the most powerful and efficient vacuum in the world.

She is happy. Brings it home. And plugs it into the socket.
It ***** up everything, including the paint from the walls,
the curtains from the window and the telephone from its cradle.

Your mother is pleased, it’s everything the salesman said it would be.
Along with her furnishings, it ***** both of us into its black belly.

Surrounded by the comforts of home we start a new life together.

One day you say, we’ll be very happy.

But it’s so dark I can’t see your face.

The phone rings.

It’s your mother.

She wants to know how we’re settling in.
Martin Challis © 2011
www.martinchallis.com
Aug 2011 · 612
Cold Comfort
martin challis Aug 2011
Rust, that un-used plough
vigilant in a swallowing green
shares the fugue
of various machinery.

And in tangible mist
milk-cans emptied flood the ground,
cows are sent back to pasture,
fence posts are made ready to burn,
in an afflicted winter
burning cold in the comfort of sorrow.

If an old crow happens at the cloudless
this is more omen
than the shrinking market.
And when the shoulders of my father
farming this winter
are no longer brave enough to carry
the sky
I carry his gun to the gate;
we walk a silent trail
to shoot an enemy
that never comes.

The cold sun; a bright nail
pinning us, the blue weight
pressing horizons from reach.

My father
searches this expanse,
his hands extend
to something...
but I see
they only move
to wave away flies.

If there is any comfort...
my hand in his
is cold this winter.
Martin Challis © 2011
www.martinchallis.com
Aug 2011 · 575
Not Leaving
martin challis Aug 2011
I’m waiting for you to leave me
but you don’t

I’m waiting
for perspective
to re-appear,
for
diminishing return
for warmth from distant appreciation
but you don’t leave

I’m inhabited
the meal doesn’t end
the wine re-fills itself

surely time will take you from me
a little further off
so I can wave
the small wave, of
loving friend

rather this
than retain the air
where you might have been
imagining that you hold me

as you do
Martin Challis © 2011
www.martinchallis.com
Aug 2011 · 1.0k
Rainbow
martin challis Aug 2011
Looking to the west I see a perfect rainbow
Tucked under and lifting a symphony of cloud
The sun beams in lay-lines from its horizon.
Yet, the scientist who explains this phenomenon
Cannot describe my feelings for such a spectacle
Cannot describe the song in me that dances
The miracle of light and spectrum.
—-
You are mighty, you are ethereal
Your many fingers rake aberrant their spatulas of light
Your beauty makes all else ghastly or at least ordinary.
The trifles of each day’s turnings are insignificant in comparison.
A conscience of orb, mist, shadow, light
The Gods derive pleasure from your presence
Else their thunderous growls bemoan your magnificence.
—-
There is no darkness just the absence of light
There is no cold just the absence of heat
There is no disbelief just the absence of your benediction.
Uncapturable, delicate, infamous portent.
In the implausible silence you are where I worship
Without beginning or ending
Yours is an ultimate mantra.
Martin Challis © 2011
www.martinchallis.com
Aug 2011 · 712
Blue to You
martin challis Aug 2011
Blue to you may be a room with a view.
To me it’s an ocean turned sideways.
It’s the colour of air gone thick with the sea,
it’s the largest and highest of high-ways.

Blue to you may be one without two,
and all of the times you’ve landed,
feet thick with dew – stuck to each hue
where you thought for a time you were stranded.

Blue to you may be a day that is new, to
me it’s the place where I’m standing.
It’s the home of the eye and the reach of the tree.
It’s the wave of the wind and the wave that is we.
Blue is the deep and the shallow the same,
it’s just where I’ll be when you’re calling my name.

Searching and spreading. Dividing our wings.
Soaring the gentle, the sharing of things.
Come endless, come empty, full with your sound
call the vast harmony and arms that surround.

Come to the blue that touches all things
come with me gentle, come let us sing,
sing the high rising, sing the low mark
sing the blue heaven that covers the dark,
and chorus the carol, the carol of being,
and the blue that is given to those that are seeing
Martin Challis © 2011
www.martinchallis.com
Aug 2011 · 992
Folding Colour
martin challis Aug 2011
The colour of towels
hang in my house
down, like waterfall
from door-corners and window sills.

Some outside
some on wracks
All open mouthed
spread welcome.

I have paintings also. They are static.
The towels move around.
They’re the colours of angels
blessing a clothesline
or bedroom floor.

If I’m wet they dry me
if they’re wet I dry them
It’s a good arrangement.

They smile at me, and often
break into laughter
when I attempt folding
they think it’s a hoot
trying to fold away colour
Martin Challis © 2011
www.martinchallis.com
Aug 2011 · 1.2k
After Cutting Timber
martin challis Aug 2011
after cutting timber
at the top of the hill
I waited for you
not long enough for the magpie’s
wing-feather to fall from the conifer
and then your silhouette
along with the sunset
struck me
and drawing closer
your smile
drawing closer
Martin Challis © 2011
www.martinchallis.com

— The End —