Today, I am thankful.
For the birds.
And the weather.
And the rolling hills in my backyard.
And the huge trees that make me feel
so small.
And my feet and legs.
And my lungs taking in huge breaths.
And my heart pounding as my feet hit the ground
with every step.
And days like today,
Because even though I had the worst day,
I can come home and just
be me.

Fun facts:
Disclaimer: these might not be fun or a fact but hey, who cares?

-I'm 15.5 years old.
-I have never been in love with a boy my age.
-That last one sounds bad.
-I've fallen in love with my 4 year old cousin.
-I really really like a boy.
-He has red hair and pale skin.
-He plays rugby.
-He likes me back.
-He is my best friend.
-I'm afraid to love him.

**end feels list.

There is a child at my school.
He is 15, just like me.
And he writes poetry.

Not ranting poetry.
Not rhyming poetry.
But the kind of poems that make you sit down,
And think about life.

In this world, there is so little love.
Knowing this physically pains me.

Love isn't always telling someone
"I love you."
It's holding open the door for the old man.
It's feeding the stray in your neighborhood.
Love doesn't take much.

What we all want is the love we see.
The old couple who always finds their way
To the park bench.
The teenage couple,
Holding hands, teasing, and looking at
Eachother like it's the first time.

This world is full of so much hate.
All I'm asking is for you to find the love
in you and make a difference.

This child,
Is changing
**the world.

For once in my life, I am trying to be concerned with my family.
Especially my older brother.
He does nothing with his life.
He is getting into drugs.
He is everything I aspire not to be.

Yet here I am. Trying to help.
Why?
I only get screamed at by my father.
Or quietly shushed by my mother.
Or yelled at by him.

"****. OFF.
YOU ARE NOTHING TO ME.
I HOPE YOU DIE."

I hope you die.

That's pretty strong stuff aimed at me.

A suicidal child.

Stress
is ripping
me
*apart.