I've always been this way,
I put on the same show everyday,
i wake up, and i put my face on, i fix my hair, drag myself to the coffee machine.
& i pain a smile on my face and pretend to be something i'm not, happy...
and everyone loves me, or the girl i pretend to be each day. but i don't.
because when you look at me, you see the glamour and the fake smile.
but i know who i really am, i have the scars to prove it.
i'm just a ****** up little girl.
but you saw right through it all, you saw the pain in my eyes and you told me you loved me and took it all away, you seen the scars and ran your lips acrossed them and told me i'm beautiful, suddenly, i started to believe it.

Her voice was soft
her kiss was sweet
and i met her in the city on a foggy sunday afternoon.
she quickly become very close to me.
but as quickly as she came into my life,
she had to leave.
this city just hasn't been the same since.
letters, phone calls, waiting...
my life revolved around waiting for her.
but it didn't matter because she liked me.
so she told me.
her return gets closer and my heart is pounding out of my chest.
but with one phone call ive realized that waiting for her return is like waiting for summer on the first day of winter, it's so long away but keeping my mind set on it helps me get through the blistering cold days.
& when it gets here, i couldnt be happier.
but i know that it can't stay for long, sooner than later i'm going to have to wait around through these bitter cold days once again.
she had the softest skin.
and a voice that made my heart sink.
and i met her in the city on a foggy sunday afternoon.
but as quickly as she came into my life,
she had to leave.

How could being in love be wrong?
you  tell me everyday that my life is a sin but what if you met someone like her?
what if you met someone who said your name and made you shiver.
what if you you met someone that had the ability to make you smile and laugh on your worst of days.
what if you met  your soul mate? the one youve been looking for.
but what if you had something in common, what if you had gender in common.
can you imagine letting them go?
I'm a girl and i'm in love with a girl.
when she says my name i shiver, she has the ability to make me laugh and smile on my worst of days. She's my soul mate, the one ive been looking for.
she makes me happy.
can't you atleast accept that?

I don't know what she has that i do not.
if your gonna tell me love than you are blind.
A stranger could have seen in the way i looked at you that saying i was in love with you was degrading how deep my love runs for you.
That's why i sit here a year later and can't help but wonder why,
why her and not me?
you have shattered the most fragile part of me into billions when it was one and i still want you, i need you.
does that not prove enough?
i know that your not coming back.
i knew you weren't from the second you said goodbye and i felt that first crack.
That is why i pour what's left of my heart to this blank piece of paper and not to those emerald green eyes, the eyes i shalt not see again.
a year later and the thought of you still makes my knee's go weak,
but your not thinking of me.
i could never love anyone the way i did you,
i gave you everything.
what's left to give?
just thinking about you bring tears to my eyes, a year later.
i'll never forget the way you made me feel.
you gave me reason and than took it away.
it's been a year and i can't get over why it's her and not me..
and i'll be writing the same poem, a year later.

she'll tell me that she loves me.
& touch my lips with hers,
sends shivers down my spine.
there's no one else in my sight,
she's all i see, all i want.
she's all i need.
it's just you and me.