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its storming outside
without a soul to trace
i wonder back to the only room which brings me comfort
slowly dragging my feet wanting nothing more but to fall
startled at how fast the water came out
creeping into the tub wanting
just wanting that tender touch
wanting the love i never could have
so i wonder of to the one place
drown myself in sorrow and loneliness
the love i once longed for is slowly killing me
slipping away into my secret place
a place of desire and longing that can never be reached
forgotten and replaced nevermore
dotted by the fearing of a voice
jumping awake balancing out my walk and talk
seeing was nothing racing back
without a soul to trace i ponder back

back to my peaceful secret place where i can dream and wish but never have
startled again stopping dead in my tracks
almost falling not knowing
has someone come to rescue me
has someone found my lonely peaceful place
have they finally found the girl who hides from the world
drowning herself in sorrow and loneliness
no i was just a desperate maiden
driven insane with your own madness
holding on to that last thread of hope
the hope she once shed blood for
wanting someone to find her but not wanting to use up her last hope
she ran back to where she could wish and dream but never could have
this was just a love she longed for
one she disparately craved
a love that will never be hers
that empty desert land filled with memories
all lost in the storm
cast me away
throw out my warmth
1000's of long lost emptiness filled by the love I once i had for you
now cast away over that deserted desert land
empty inside
nothing left
am i just another one of your wretches
am just to be fooled with
thrown away in the ditch
broken down
just another ******* in your web of lies
say you love me than curse me away
lost memories fill the sky
fill my heart with unforgivable lust  
lust which I've cast away
never to be spoken of again
see my dear friends love is not one to trust
it will seize your heart and tear it apart
makes you feel like you are in heaven
but really you only exist in hell
it might come at a force so strong u cannot control
try to break the bond
try to get away
but you are already a victim
a victim to its lustrous smell
its deceivable warmth  
makes you believe you are special
and no one else has felt this way
than it takes it
take that feeling
makes you feel worthless
takes everything and leaves you broken
on the floor you are crying
regretting everything
every word ever spoken
but you can't go back
can't erase the past
so now it haunts you
you were just some man's *****
his one night stand
his perk of the night
you swear revenge
swear to get it back
so you become the very thing you hate
a demon to the style of hurt
.....a slave to love
cried out dried, nothing left to say
wishing we were still one as if the past could run back
turn the hands of the clock if i must
staring that one single picture above my dresser bed
just wanting to pour out my heart
letting go crying myself to sleep
why so hard to love with out pain
cried and cried wishing time could stop and reverse
lost love lost time nothing left to live for
carrying on with no soul
just to be
to be without you lost in space lost in time - lost - gone
running in circle losing it gone mad
what this game they call
thus impossible to love without pain
wish i could leave get out
but no i'm already too deep in
already gone
die for the love i never had died for the one that never loved me back
died for this silly thing called love
but I was cried out already had no purpose left
had to go had to make a mark had to take a stand
so there you have it folks
love conquers all they say it really is true
just not good truth
it conquers all into its web of death
i was just a lost soul without you
smashing thru the phrases of a lost love
how ever do you regain herself
but than again i am already gone
dead gone forgotten
died for one who never loved me back
if only
just if only the hand of the clock could reverse
run back the past
my last summer day
the last time you threw me out
that was it that was the day i became lost
for i was just a lost soul without you
i was already gone before you came
i just wanted love
love from you but you never could give it
never could love me back
and now I'm gone
shall my ghost hunt your forever heart
shall you remember me and u creep with fear
for i may have died of this love
it conquered me and now I'm gone
but my ghost will never leave your soul
With these broad roads and vise lands
With nothing at hand you brought me up
And gave me so much more than you ever had
You were my inspiration
My light
My soul
You gave me hope
Made me want to be different
You are my inspiration
My dedication
I dedicate this to you
Everything I am
Everything I will ever be
Everything I've been
You brought me up with nothing from the dust
My mother
My motherland
My homeland
And now here I am
Gave me hope
Gave me sight
Made me see further than I ever could
Gave me pride
Gave me light
Made me shine so much more brighter than I ever was
Gave me flight
made me go higher
Exceed the maximum with no limitation
You were my inspiration
My dedication
Maybe
Maybe just one day I can venture back
Back to you my inspiration
To give thanks
Thanks for everything
But for now I dedicate this
This word
This message
Everything I am
What you made me
Everything I've been
I dedicate it to you
My mother
My motherland
Where I call home
My inspiration to be different
Had so little but gave me so much more
So much more to go on with the rest of my life
You was my guide
My inspiration
My knight in shining armor
My desert flower
Gave me hope from nothing
You was my diamond in the rough
Taught me to love
Taught me all that I know
What can I say
You was my inspiration
You was my angel from above
Taught to love those who hate me
Those who envy me
Taught me to care for those who wish evil upon
You are my inspiration
I hope that someday I grow up to be like you
To be someone else’s inspiration
Because of you I’m who I am
You are my inspiration
My dedication
My homeland

— The End —