Held like the neck of a bottle
Forgetting to look both ways

Voice torn out
Prideful abandon

Shut the **** up
And pay your rent

I can let it grow on me but I can't keep anything off.
I can't keep clean.
The **** suckers had other plans anyway.

My guts are eroding.
I wrap myself in sheets and roll down the bank into the river.
Cold chemical baths for the sick and disorderly.

White noise money, millions  bet on a chance.
Escape the bad lighting and minimum wage.
Notice the disconnect between love and anything else.

It's cold crossing the bridge.
Even colder when empty eyes won't stop staring.
When I skinned my knee's everything didn't seem so bad.

But there you are, sitting on the curb laughing like a maniac.
I laugh too because this city never ate us whole.
It spit us out before it could even swallow.

The moon under my finger nails
Bruised sky
We follow the trail down
Greenish gold tapestries  held up

Quickly thrown between
The time it took to smother the monster
That told us "No"
And betting on our own inevitable silence

Lightning struck forever
Hits me on the head on more time

Wood friend burns sweet things
Spider's own the night

You hear that?
The crazy cult party next door is laughing at us!

Monster's are always in the corners of our mind.
In whatever form they may come.

From a box
I'm cut up so agreeable
Under the heat lamp
I mummify

**** me through a straw
Coming up
Building monumental failures
I dissipate

From a hall of shadow a sigh escapes
You have the outline of an insect
The gold glowing mouth of god

We hear you across the way
In your leisure wear gradually being covered in dust

Will you stand poised against the blood thirsty congregation?
Will you cry out in splintered delight?

Slumped in the backseat
Feel the light shine and pass across closed eyelids
Electricity sizzlez and pops against brain tissue
I want to end so I can be everything

Help reaches out in the form of tiny eyes and a few off-handed comments
Lets go play outside with masks on
Be careful, after years of work these walls are still fragile
Poision seeps, I left a stain on your bed

We brought reminders of home
Coffee smudged against the tile floor
Renovations needed made
Asleep against the wheel going seventy

Continue Posing in front of the glass
Pretending not to watch the next ****
You can't decide if you should run out to intervene
Maybe next time

A hundred miles away blowing bubbles on the front lawn
Ice cream trucks tipped over in the heat
Who ate the last of our delusions?
Someone daring enough to consume a flat falseness

I want the children to know that it's not their fault
But some of them may never know
So what does that mean for us?
I break sweat.

I wonder if anyone feels good enough
In the end
I feel incredibly stuck in the patterns of my own thought process
I've done this body wrong
I greedily wish for a new one that is easier for people to love

The love you took but never did anything with
Laid up against all of the sunsets in new england

Places like these
Hold down ghosts on street corners
Begging for forgiveness

Talking to yourself in the passenger seat of a friends car
Breaking through static and time

We've got what you think you need
You just have to be willing to pay the price

Stared out at all the different faces
Equal and opposite parts break my stride
I fall apart to the sound of laughter
The next room over

Friends are like bugs in the radiator
Hoping they'll be the same as they are in your memories
But they never are
And neither are you

Leaking control issues out of my eyes
Jumped on the bed till it broke
Saw some names in the paper
This stillness is terrifying

young lovers not doing any loving
falling asleep in the strangest of places
whisper tiny secrets into unfledged ears

motel bedrooms along massive stretches of pavement
adultry violence addicton
a loss of innocence never recovered

i pass by these moments at 65 miles per hour
unsure of their reality
towing the lines between sleep and a coma

life's worth a split level with a pool and a two car garage
wives spitting in their loved ones dinner
rejoice for the middle class!

sin runs in the family
like water overflowing from a gutter
don't tell dad i went into his hunting room

you kiss like a priest, hard and shapeless
distance isn't what changes you
and besides i'm tired of you passing out in my bathtub

Honey melted behavioral patterns
Eye against the screen
Something we all have in common
Heart sink  over flow

Woke up sweating
A few cartons of cigarettes crushed against my head
Lies erode the enamel on my teeth
Yet I smile for appearances

I hear the cold creeping in through the floorboards
Wasting away with words
My insatiable  curiosity with be the death of me

There are boys throwing a ball in the road
My cat is staring at me
I don't have any answers

I keep searching for love, honesty
Though I'm not a very honest person

Motivation only comes in pill form now
Make sure someone else isn't telling you what you want

Feed me
I am a bottomless pit
Feed me your soul

Stretched across
Spread thin against the parking lots
Blood and pavement

Burnt ideas crammed through
The hole in your head
What is there to grasp for?

Fill up the lonely seats
Smooth down the goosebumps
Wait for the surprise

Memories bite the brain
On the path
An up turned loneliness
Waits patiently at the gate

The immense white sky
Looming over giant parking lots
Talk radio drones on
Trying to bear down the ugly facts

That nobody knows

The answers to incredible mysteries
Sleep silently in the dim morning of you

With one thought they will stir
Under the cover of tomorrow's questions

Allow the energy and time
To bring it up

Boy walks down road
He's got a thick outline and heavy hands

Boy sits in chair, slouched, hands folded
He's got blackhole eyes and a secret smile

Boy lays in bed unraveling his thoughts
He's got question marks falling out of his mouth

I'll bite him with my brave teeth and pray for rain
I will lay in his web and watch

I'm getting tired
Talking to ghosts that don't like me

If you stand by for too long
Something might slip

You'll see me
And that's when I disappear

Behind the shooting pain in natures side
Our resounding efforts glow
A faint call
Against the black veil

Cough up the meaning
Shake me out of bed
The day we'll find out
In silence

Captured through something terribly unremarkable
Forever drunk on watered down uncivil pride

The universe sends me back everything I do
In a new twisted shape of irony
It cuts at me
As a I lay alone in bed

The blanket of an endless night
Keeps us aware as we push on
Regardless of the fact that we do not know why
While in another time
Millions of lives are being hoisted up into the sun

Buildings rise and fall to the sound of our heartbeats
Once in awhile my skin tingles to the thought of
Not being able to tell the difference between
My feeling and your feeling
Your skin or my skin
All the billions of eyes, still can't see it all

I want to be good to everyone and everything
It seems so impossible but I need to figure out how
I can't hate myself any longer
I'll spend my life trying to embrace life
The murmur of our dreams forever in the background
Born of space and sound