That nasty night still remains in my mind.
When everything was cold, stinky, and dark,
and the cries breaking the silence were mine,
drowning the sweetest memories once we had.

Lying on the ground, I was crying ****** tears.
I was yelling my lungs out, but nobody could hear.
How loud I was desperately begging any kind of help!
But we were all alone in that disgusting, filthy place.

Beyond all the overwhelming silence surrounding us,
beyond all the exhaustion and agony inside you,
somehow your voice found its way through your throat.
But the words you pronounced were as painful as the wounds.

Those last words weakly whispered destroyed my entire world.
Barely breathing, I saw the gaze held in those eyes of yours.
With an unstoppable determination, they let me know you were not afraid.
You were fully and proudly ready to embrace the smiley face of death.

In that moment, when you were lying in my arms,
when your body was turning heavier in front of my eyes,
I was losing my strength and begging to the skies,
to give us some redemption, to give us another chance to stay alive.

But heaven is as selfish as our own desires.
So my wishes were trapped only by the devil's eyes,
who laughed at my despair and only sat to watch.
As simple as that, my last chance leaked  away and my reality died.

I wish my knees had never fallen and my will had never weakened.
Perhaps so, this guilt wouldn't be killing me slowly.
How ashamed I am, to think that I used to say "I tried".
But I was just deceiving myself; I hid from the truth and lied.
As I lost my warm place, I hold to this sweet regret.

And now, I'm sitting in the edge of the hole
Watching the graves of the lost,
seeing how at the end of the world
No one will be able to open the mystic ****
and safely cross through the sacred door.