A pathetic attempt
A hand has been reached
Pushed into a drought
Robbing you of your depth

Drink away that ember
Your making of your heart
Reflects your repulsive attempt of a soul
With the drink you hold within your hand

I'm done with you and your antics.

Dawn once again breaks past and soon it's day
Too bad for you cuz you're saying it's still the same
The sun exposed past the window shades
But you're ****** waking up with nothing to blaze

The sheets go back up give it another few hours
**** it and forget the day you were suppose to devour
You're up at the mirror but you retract like a coward
Never gonna see how they say you're that flower

The light in the night that gets them through the day
The person to go to who can figure out the way
But your light is a fire within the flame
Looked past but burning inside you as you sway

Swiftly to the music that gives you your breath
That song about love, life, hate, waste and death
Your only escape from that routine... that ****...
A vibe to hide you from when they all left

That build up of time devoted to your struggle
Times we don't speak of not even a mumble
Each instance of fear where you determined that no other
Could understand why each emotion is huddled

You were at your breaking point beyond control
Suffocating entirely with nothing to hold
Now you're reminded of what you still hide
You're reminded of that fire inside

A year and change to date is how you'd say
You've changed your life to try and explain
The absence of pain that continued to play
You keep to yourself that it's the same but not the same

"Push me. tell me something I don't wanna hear"
A fight just to fight just to help the red clear
Depression and it's favorites submerging near
Everything you hoped couldn't be swallowed in fear

The damage of the past is beyond your control
You know this but its different when there's nothing to hold
Nobody sees because you're too strong to unfold
But I see it in you the heat that screams for cold

Life in itself is the reminder you need
It sits here in front of you while you continue to bleed
A family, a home and a stomach to feed
Broken through a mirror but enough to see

That you within existence ripples the air
Every person you've touched, every time that you've cared
The music you vibe because the feelings are shared
You're significant down to the very curl of your hair.



"Every day above ground is a good day."

(Should I leave?
It's not like you're needing me.
I'm just that other half
Who sometimes happens to be seen)

Remember when it was you and me?
All the things we could be
But time goes so quick
Every little trick
I knew
Didn't pull through
I was left to loose


Should I leave?
It's not like you're needing me.
I'm just that other half
Who sometimes happens to be seen
Should I stay?
I know what you would say.
"You're a part of me
You're just not the girl I see."


Right here for you I'll sing this song
A feeling for the first time wrong
In a sense to escape
I tried for you to recreate
But I knew
How I feel for  you
I guess I'm set to loose


Should I leave?
It's not like you're needing me.
I'm just that other half
Who sometimes happens to be seen
Should I stay?
I know what you would say.
"You're a part of me
You're just not the girl I see."


Come on please It's just me
Your back burner at such an ease
Hold me just once more that way
Say again that it's all okay


Should I leave?
It's not like you're needing me.
I'm just that other half
Who sometimes happens to be seen
Should I stay?
I know what you would say.
"You're a part of me
You're just not the girl I see."

Should I leave?
It's not like you're needing me.
I'm just that other half
Who sometimes happens to be seen

This heart is meant to be seen. I've found that one so I've gotta leave.

I've walked alone enough to know
Things don't come easy
A life of almost good enough
Couldn't be what's to please me
So I stayed within a centered line
Where no one could touch me
Too blinded by my own strength
To even try and see

You're could enough to
Freeze in spite
Mad enough to
Loose this fight
But I've had
Enough tonight
This isn't right
It's isn't right

You're broken down to
Never feel
Scared to death of
What is real
But I've tried
Too much to heal you
This isn't right
It's not right.

Break this selfish

Sense of being

Make a move

Beyond your breathing



Hate

can do so much

Love

The healing touch



Buried away until tomorrow

Find the day for you it's borrowed

Let this resting day

Show you strength to get away



Hold your ground

Look past the bleeding

Hold the truth

When it's worth keeping



Fight

To stay alive

Rise

Surpass this climb



Buried away until tomorrow

Find the day for you it's borrowed

Let this hallowed day

Show you strength to get away



Lift your hands and feel this

Selfless sense of being

Bare you hearts to feel this

Final life remarking meaning



Buried away until tomorrow

Find the day for you it's borrowed

Let this resting day

Show you strength to get away



Buried away until tomorrow

Find the day for you it's borrowed

Let this hallowed day

Show you strength to get away



I'll show my strength and get away

Countless times through this trail and error
I've dug past the ******* and saw you as fair
**** the fights those nights where I hated us both
Cuz I knew that with you was me at my most
Not at my best cuz my best can't exist
A best takes the test to prevail not dismiss
But with you that's my last. Last possible thought
Cuz with you I'm at my worst but you're all that I've got

So how can it happen where we fall apart
We is now me and you bound to separate marks
I take in this breathe but forget to exhale
I'm more than just ****** cuz I know that I've failed
To you I'm just me not a person to love
Not the one that you want but the one that you trust
I've ****** myself down in this meaningless trail
But Ima find that ******* rabbit and make that ***** wail

A separated path has come
A break between our memories
Holding on to what we've done
But straying towards my new beliefs

The moment's time is soon to come
Shaken hands release the break
Despite all of the things you've done
It's leaving here where I will wake

A promise doomed for me to loose
An endless fight I dare to choose
A life left behind in spite
The pain of losing you I fight

Broken bottles blood in hands
No longer pierced by your command
Leaving you to live for me
Leaving this to set me free

I breathe into the November air
And look up into the sky
Every star I see from afar
Reminds me of the beauty in your eyes

The wind breaks through this jacket
And I shiver from the cold
Reminds me of my used to be warmth
When I was your baby to hold

I'm programed to know this bitter cold
I'm prepared for all it's wrath
Every chill is to remind me
How November changed our paths

Thirteen years in 6 days
Since the last time I saw your face
That much further from whom I love
Distance so forcefully placed

The birthday seeming simple
Sadly set as last
A week to live and love
And then your time to pass

But in this frigid atmosphere
I'll smile despite the cold
You are ne'er forgotten
My heart you have to hold

We speak of the simplicities;
Of your wants and desires.
We know of the detail
And this bond has bound my shackles.

To love you is to know you
And I know you
More than words can say
Only I see what you are and why

Your intentions impure
Knowing this lately
Has captured my newest attention
All the while I fall for your smile

Myself in itself was once so real
A soul bound by the ideas
Not by what I want
Nor by what you think you need

A platter placed in your bed
Silver and full
To create that smile
I find myself falling for.

Due time come to be
It was never meant for you and me
But I can tell you now
It was meant to be

I share everything with myself
Because I know I'm one to trust
But for some reason
It's you I wanna breathe
It's you that I want
Here with me

******* aside
I know my past
Filled with envy
That's meant to last

Yet i miss you now
Only hours have gone
Sense I've kissed you lips
Since I've wrote this song

The pain of a memory can  break in
You can suffocate in the night never knowing
What exactly it was that pushed you over the edge.
The night has a way of stripping you cold.

It's that fear within the night that takes a hold of us
Puts us in our place piece by piece.
Reminding you of the dark just past the window
Reminding me of the empty space that lays to my side.

Quietly a whimper escapes the mouth
Cautiously to protect the reputation we hold so tightly
No one is to recognize the lack of life in our eyes
Never can we show how dead we are inside

I was seven years old
With not a decade of life
You were my world
My mom; his wife

I believed that lie
As you covered that bruise
You told me you tripped
So I ignored the clues

But his anger got worse
And your tears broke through
But you were my angel
What could I do?

He dug you deeper
And I watched you scar
His malevolent motives
Fabricated from the bar

And now that your gone
I pass through each day
Knowing you suffered
In the worst of ways

I promise to remember
Your loving embrace
Your smile, your laugh,
And the curves of your face

But you've taught me much more
Than to mother a child
You've taught me to hate
And you've taught me to cry

I refuse to break
from the strike of a man
For you I'll find strength
And respect who I am

How do you trust with skin slim deep
I see a darkness in the thoughts she keeps
I steady my pace avoiding her bite
But I'm bound by these fears when she pushes to fight

I filter the world and escape from my mind
Knowing now in this moment I'm in a stillness of time
Away from my thoughts in a first degree burn
A compared pain that I've loved to learn

Alone in the dark I'm forced to this night
No clue whats to come to me without light
Lurking in the dark is the one that I hate
She seeps through my walls and i fear for my fate