Twenty years of my life I've Lived with a time span of lucid, vivid dreams,

Their mind grasping & boggling though I've had more good than bad it seems.

Movement in the day has me sitting in a room with 3 white walls covered in pain,

calmness by the window breeze with the sun up high & not a cloud to send rain.

Racing thoughts as I write about my future though I mainly wonder away with my past,

Cloudy head, clear tears, Someone help me to understand how long misery can last.

For when I'm sad they come & when happy they go & still to me they never leave my heart,

For I can feel the pain & taste the scars that fate brang forth to tear me apart.

Admitting-ly I confess how lost I feel & yet I still know how to stand strong,

My knowledge keeps me assertive, doing only right & depriving me of all the wrong.

For within time;  say 10years from now I will be much wiser, with less pain & less sorrow,

Only wanting to better myself will get me off to a good start  leaving behind today & looking forward to tomorrow.

So as I continue to sit in a empty room I think ahead into the day,

Imagining Royal Palms puts my eyes to rest, my heart at ease, and takes My Soul Away! <3<3<3

Written By:  Maggie Lopez-Lavalle

Date: May 27, 1997

No one knows his exact time with Fate, no one but God-
Though every life I read about makes me O' so very saud.

In that very moment that I begin to ask God why as I begin to pray,
He quiets my soul and refreshes my heart "Shhh-It was there time, there moment of day".

Tho re-assured that God is Omnipotent and all knowing He knows why they are gone,
And though it doesn't make it right even through this He will become glorified and by Him Granting Serenity is how His people stay strong.

By: Maggie Lopez-Lavalle
Written: July 12, 2013

Trying to wrap my head around everything that daily stirs in my chest,
Do I tangibly hold it, mold it, adhere to it or simply lay it down to rest.

So many questions so little answers and I'm fine with the percentage of how my life is balanced out,
For there is not time to live Chaotically and feed this mad disease called Doubt.

To be Free and Clear in My Heart, Head, Body and Soul,
Is to never report that what you held so dear someone repulsively stole.

So while there are days where my head tells my legs to take a step and walk,
I then simply encourage my journey and give myself a frequent pep-talk.

You are ok, alive, breathing, talking, living, laughing, and healthy...who can ask for more,
Selfishly I raise my head "I can" Lord you know what I am asking when I ask of thee to CLOSE THAT DOOR.

By: Maggie Lopez-Lavalle
Written: April 16, 2013

The sounds of Thunder in the sky and rain diving from the clouds,

And the sorrow on the lake is so incomplete from all its crowds.

When will they come again to unfold their hearts before the lake shore,

When the rain and the thunder subside of course take away, take away what u have in store.

I wish not to hear what sounds like bombs going off right outside my window pane,

Sounds like its the end of the world when will the sun bring forth warm change.

What I wouldn't give to see the sun and not the rain that dives from the clouds and onto the ground,

For it would be better than what I hear now Rain And Thunder All Around.

Somewhere ahead my soul walks the Valley of Life & Death; in limbo between dying & birth,

My Spirit is trying to keep me alive yet my flesh is just dying to scour the earth.

Where do I sign to sell the devil my soul or do I continue giving God the le-way to excavate, mold & tread my path.

Allowing him to be before all; I choose everything is well but to dismay the right always brings me near to gravity & closer to wrath.

I've never experienced such Love, Pain and Sorrow in all the years I've anchored to another heart,

To feel so close yet so distant and far away yet so close but always feeling like were 7 miles apart.

I can't tell you how to feel, you are a person all your own though within I am dying from the challenge this has come to be,

If I would have known then what I've seen now, I would have never accepted us to pass and our souls would still be flowing free.

I have no room to breathe for who I once loved so much has taken my throat & is choking me down deep into the ground,

To realize that you really don't care and all that surrounds us has been dead but from time to time can be graciously found.

I cannot breathe when you are away, I cannot feel when you are not near but when your near we end up silent because of your ways,

Empty moments, skin that feels numb and all these quarrels feel like numerous, endless, hopeless and faithless days,

To look back now and claim you as I have is a huge lesson It was absurd and down right deadly and THANK GOD THAT YOU WERE JUST A PHASE.

BY: Maggie L.L
Written in 2009