Sometimes I think
I was the one made
After a long day
Once God had long been finished
His sixth gin and tonic
Then I think - Wait
I'm an athiest

Good god my man
Do you want me to love you?
Throw myself at the ivory base
Of your precious little pedestal?
Well good luck with that one
You sweet confused child
Who hardens the wretched knot
Forever squeezing my chest
Strangling my heart and lungs
Don't play with me any longer
I'm trying my ******* hardest
To grow my young bones up
To wake up alone and proud
To be able to turn around

Ba ***
I feel the beat
Ba ***
Its everywhere
From my shaking mind
To my broken heart
And my bleeding fingers
It is constant
Reminding me of what I've done
Keeping me present
When I want to break
To shatter
Curl in a ball
On the floor of the train
Going nowhere
Going home.
Ba ***

Oh that I live
I live and I live and I live
But what is this living?
When you are at home
And no ones life is on the line
Least of all your own
I want to feel alive
Not just be living
I want to break bones
Before they grow brittle
I dont want to limp along
I never want to grow old
I want to run forever
To be remembered
To hurt the cruel
And dance with the dejected
Make every day feel my breath
Everyone hear my heartbeat
As it slams through my chest
Oh that I am alive
But so rarely living