How do you like me now?

Does it appear to you that I am a man? Because my hair is short?

I am very much a woman and love my feminine side as well as my masculine side. I am ****, loveable, kind and always me.

You don't want to change me, you just want to be me. You cannot see yourself as me but you want to be me.Why is that?

You cannot be me. I am me and me is all I have and if there was another me then I wouldn't want to be me. it's hard enough being me without trying to be me more than once.

Maybe in my next life. After I have lived through this life and have perfected ths one. maybe then will I be able to be me more than once. But if in this life now I don't succeed in perfecting myself then the new life will have to work harder to be able to catch up to me more than once.

I am not making any sense of this or are you?

see.................. it's hard to be me.

Copyright@2010 By Madeline C. Baxter

We all keep reaching for something
to calm our nerves, soothe our skin and
make us whole

we only need to look to the sun for our nourishment
with it's blisstery wet rains
and high temps

for it is with this we are renewed and not alone
our skin sweltering in the sun and sand
while we play out our dreams and journeys.

keeping track of those that are near and dear to us
and trying to catch a wave to float on to the next generation.

wave goodbye to our past and when we enter the
tunnel we are in a new world.
It's much brighter there and slower so that we may engage
and flourish in it's mounds of joy and love.

reach out my friends and share this pillow of clouds with others
for it is with these things we reach.

She follows the sun as it rises
in the morning sky
her hair blowing through the winds
caressing her skin and down her
body to her feet
as they run in the sand

sweating and panting she staggers and
falls into soft tender arms and is laid down
and kissed until she is breathless still

the smell of wildflowers is all around her as
she looks above her to see the sparkling sun
and sees not what is caressing her
melting her into a stupor

blinking she tries hard to see and feel what
has her captured and swollowing her
so deeply into a sensual fantasy while she hears
the sounds of water and the smell of those wildflowers

she must remember this place so that she may come
back to this land and swelter in it's glory
with the sky beaming down on her warming her

That's it,it's the sun that has warmed me and left me
to dwell in it's splender and joy.
Underneath the morning sun, those wildflowers
will never fly from my senses.

I see her through the clouds
Of the smoke filled bar room

Not a hair out of place
Dressed in leather and lace

Our eyes meet
My body moves towards her
As if in a trance

She greets me with a smile
And asks me to dance

She takes my hand
And leads me to the dance floor

With slow moves and in step
With the music we move together
Our bodies perfectly fit

When the music stops
She fades into the crowd and
Out of sight

I look around and see her
Standing by the light
She winks and waves goodnight.

Copyright@2005 Madeline C. Baxter

She sleeps in the raw in the
house on the hill
and only stirs when the cool
breeze from the open
window chills her

opening one eye she see it's still
dark outside and grabbing the covers she sinks
deeper into sleep in the house on the hill

fading, wandering, dangling on the
edge of morning she awakens rested and
full of the morning sunshine
listening to the birds as she walks naked through
the house on the hill

humming as she washes the sleep from her eyes
and seeing her naked body in the mirror as she dries her face
she wonders how long will the house on the hill
withstand
the turmoil like pain and suffering
that life bestows upon us making us weak like
aged wood

who suffers more, the house on the hill or
human life?
each has it's own life span but as long as the house
on the hill can withstand so shall I but not without change.

copyright@2007 Madeline C. Baxter

[ She awakened in the night ]
She awakened in the night
hearing the sweet sounds
of music drifting through the room

rising and grabbing a robe to cover her
naked body she walks slowly
through the hall and sees
a light

shaking her head she wonders if it's a dream
as the music becomes louder and
she begins to dance
her arms raising up in the air
as if in a trance

curling and swirling her robe opens enough
to show her thighs so thick
and soft
as the muscles begin to tighten
from bending in time to keep up with her feet
bare and on the hardwood floor that  feels like rubber

wandering and swaying to the beat
off in a distance she hears the
clap of hands against bare skin
as she looks up  a swirling
mist engulfs her with the wings of
a thousand butterflies

she moans softly,as the tide rushed through
her thrusting, arching toward it
helpless and loathe to fight it
it was the thing she feared most
it had come for her....
it was her destiny
and nothing would ever be the same.......

The Darkness
hanging onto the lightpole to keep from
falling into the wind
holding onto her hat to
keep from losing it in the air

when the moonlight shows through the dark clouds
she whimpers
clawing and scratching at the people to get away
from the maddening crowd

it's a dreary world out here
in the unknown and nowhere is a human in sight

she loses her strength  every minute that passes
and the darkness follows her
the billowy clouds getting ever so darker

then comes the roar
as she hangs ever so tightly to the pole
taking in the sounds of the high pitch that
brings even the strong to there knees

and the sounds gets louder until the bright light fills the sky and
out comes the demon

scattering and hissing and clearing the runway
while sparks fill the air
I see the eyes of the demon and squint to ward off the twinkle
of the feeling of helplessness and am brought to my
senses by the moon so bright and full

in my drunken stupor after the moon has passed it's
lunor phaze I am whole again
until the next year when the time becomes shorter
and the people more vunerable in this life.

There's something about the sky
when it hovers over me like a blanket
keeping me warm with it's hues

I'm glad it's there everyday keeping me in check
following me around like my shadow
I cannot do any wrong when it's there

I am not invisable during the day
but when night falls it's the darkness
that hovers and still the sky follows me.

She arrived just after midnight on a white stallion
without her spurs
As the wind blew up a gust of wind she hung onto her hat
walking through the street
a silent warrior her boots torn and scuffed from days of hardship
in the fields

she goes it alone now as the street begins to narrow when she
comes to a dead end without any lights

CopyrightBy Madeline C. Baxter 2009