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Jun 2012 · 678
Maybe Someday
Maddie Bukowsky Jun 2012
Maybe someday we'll be together,
when you're mine I know I'll sleep better.
It may be difficult, the challenge we face,
but we're okay because of God's grace.
We'll keep fighting, we'll smile not frown,
the world is against us but we won't back down.
Lately I can't separate fiction from fact,
how will I walk away with my pride intact?
Faking a smile is my personal victory,
but my delusive manner still makes me a mystery.
I'm sorry if I'm frustrating and confused,
I'm not quick to trust, I've been too abused.
The timing is off, we're not in our right minds,
but there's something in you I never thought I'd find.
I know right now we're stuck in stormy weather,
so sleep, and maybe someday we'll be together.
Jun 2012 · 657
Different to Me
Maddie Bukowsky Jun 2012
There is a change in the way you speak to me,
There is a change in your touch.
I am used to your different moods,
But it has never hurt this much.
There is a change in the way you walk,
You no longer call my name.
Someone has taken over your mind,
Leaving me in pain.
I just want the other you back,
The one that I used to know.
I think I know what’s coming,
But I can’t stand letting you go.
Please show me you’re the same,
It’s something that I need.
I don’t think that we can be fixed,
You’re just too different to me.
Jun 2012 · 733
Sinking
Maddie Bukowsky Jun 2012
The water is getting higher,
it surrounds me on all sides.
I'm panicking,
I'm looking but there's no way out.
It's climbing fast, over my ears and over my head,
I think the worst is over but it's only begun.
I'm not drowning,
but sinking.
I can still feel everything,
the pain didn't vanish.
Lord, if this is my punishment just let me die,
I don't want to burn anymore.
The worst part is feeling so numb,
but still feeling everything.
Jun 2012 · 592
Already Gone
Maddie Bukowsky Jun 2012
Sometimes I see you,
A face in the crowd.
Walking through my dreams,
Calling out loud.
Sometimes I forget,
You have gone away.
I wake in the sunshine,
To a cold lonely day.


Sometimes I hold you,
But only in my dreams.
I wake up and you're gone,
just like the moon beams.
Sometimes I follow,
Down the rainy way.
Following your footsteps,
they never go away.


Sometimes I hear you,
Laughing down the hall.
But I know I can't see you,
You're not there at all.
Sometimes I hold you,
Kiss your sleeping head.
it hurts to remember,
cause it feels like you're dead.
Jun 2012 · 762
Relapse, Recover, Repeat.
Maddie Bukowsky Jun 2012
Being alone again makes it hurt,
people whisper that it could be worse.
I cannot focus on more than one thing,
my mind says I'm healthy but it stings.
There I go, breaking myself down,
it's no wonder nobody sticks around.
There's a simple comfort, "Last time I was bigger,"
There are things I can't avoid,
and everything is a trigger.
You can't catch lightning,
and it's dangerous to try.
But if I almost die from it,
maybe it can change my wicked mind.
Jun 2012 · 573
Lonely
Maddie Bukowsky Jun 2012
It hurts to have no one to run to,
it hurts to have no one to care.
It hurts to have no one to share my pain,
when my dreams disappear in thin air.

The weight of the pain piling up on my back,
it leaves me to wonder "what does my life lack?"
Someone like you, someone to be my friend,
someone to trust to be there til the end.
Someone to comfort me when I mourn,
it hurts as bad as the ***** from a thorn.

I want you now and I want you forever,
I want you to be here and leave my side never.
Jun 2012 · 761
Meraviglioso
Maddie Bukowsky Jun 2012
Dio, sono ovunque,
Mi stupisce la bellezza di questo mondo.
Riempire di me, Dio.
Bisogno di te ora e per sempre.
Tua grazia mi lascia senza parole.
This simple poem took me forever to get right. The conjugations are probably way off, but I'm proud that I wrote Italian with no help!
Jun 2012 · 904
Hidden Pain
Maddie Bukowsky Jun 2012
I waited until I knew she was gone,
the whole time checking behind me.
I went up the stairs in silence,
I knew she'd let me be.
I got to the top and there it was,
the horrible bathroom door.
I went inside and locked it,
and then sank down to the floor.
I turned on the water,
I knew it would drown out the sound.
Sticking my finger down my throat,
my head was spinning around.
I held onto the seat,
then came the tears.
I looked at who I'd become,
someone that I feared.
I felt like such a failure,
tears streamed down my face.
I'd disappeared slowly,
and I was gone without a trace.
I'd wished for help all the time,
but what was I to do?
I was the one that had made this choice,
it was this I'd put myself through.
I flushed my sorrows down,
and turned to face the sink.
I grabbed the bottle of mouthwash,
and took a shameful drink.
My mom knocked at the door,
my heart began to race.
I turned the water back on,
and started to wash my face.
"I'm busy right now" I started to say,
I knew she wouldn't ask why.
I told her I was taking my makeup off,
hoping she'd believed my lie.
I finally came out,
I was weak and tired and ready to sleep.
I wanted to hide my secret from the world,
bury it really deep.
I got in my bed,
and turned off the light.
I closed my eyes,
and tried to sleep through the night.
The next day came again,
I finally was awake.
I put on another smile,
the one I had to fake.
The day went well,
until I locked the bathroom door.
Where once again like always,
I would sink to the bathroom floor.
Jun 2012 · 930
Trapped in my Castle
Maddie Bukowsky Jun 2012
A fragile Cinderella sitting in her castle,
she hides from the sunny skies.
She yearns to break free from her prison,
she looks out with her sad, green eyes.
The only people in her life,
all they do is feed her lies.
Though when she closes her door,
they pretend not to hear her cries.
"You are unloved, you are unwanted,"
they constantly whisper in her ear.
She has no choice, she has to listen,
as they tell her how to act and what to fear.

A fragile Cinderella sitting in her castle,
they all tell her she's bad luck.
She wants to scream and run away,
but there's nowhere to go, she's stuck.
She drifts off into daydreams,
floating to the clouds above.
A glimmer of hope from the stories she hears,
at least in Heaven they'll show her love.
Her family doesn't listen to her goals,
they try to map out her fate.
She's done everything she can,
but she cannot break through the hate.

However, life is better outside these walls,
it is not as bad as it seems.
For when she finally gets out of her castle,
she finally realizes her dreams.
For once in her life she feels happy,
her heart doesn't feel so hollow.
When she gets away from the judging eyes,
she knows the right path to follow.
This fragile Cinderella knows her worth,
not another tear will fall.
As of now, she controls her life,
she is learning to stand tall.

The people may not listen,
they'll tell her that she's ******.
She'll just nod along in silence,
but in her heart she knows where she stands.
She knows who she is inside,
she's ready to take this risky move.
From this day on she is living for herself,
to her friends and family she has nothing to prove.


A fragile Cinderella sitting in her castle,
she chooses not to speak out.
Loneliness may surround her,
but her heart is free of doubt.
Jun 2012 · 816
Burning
Maddie Bukowsky Jun 2012
The sight of you releases butterflies inside of me.
Your eyes, deep and endless, call to me, lure me in.
Mesmerizing, hypnotizing, like a dream, like a fantasy.
Your voice is like velvet, every word you say is a symphony.
Your touch sends a tingling shock through my body.
I melt, your fingertips touching mine.
It's hard to control the feelings inside of me, a sensation like nothing I've ever felt.
Strong and unchanging, you're so close, your sweet aroma filling my head.
Your arms are like my lullaby, soothing my soul.
Hold me, don't let me go, stay in this moment.
Your kiss is a drug, and I'm helplessly addicted.
It's hard to breathe, I can't even speak.
Restless thoughts, and my knees go weak.
Jun 2012 · 962
Restless Thoughts 1
Maddie Bukowsky Jun 2012
You only have one life; that means you only have one chance to get it right.
Yeah, you may blow it, but forgiveness still lingers.
Through all the terrible mistakes we make, forgiveness still lingers.
Living in the midst of judgement, and reacting in anger, forgiveness still lingers.
Through thoughts of depression, and harming ourselves, forgiveness still lingers.
When we give in to that nagging little voice, forgiveness still lingers.
Wanting something you don't have, but taking for granted everything you do have, forgiveness still lingers.
Ignoring the ones who have always been there, but adoring the ones who haven't, forgiveness still lingers.
Trust is a privilege, not a right. You have to earn it. It takes years to build but only seconds to ruin.
No matter how many times you mess up, forgiveness is everywhere.
But here's the catch: you must ask to be forgiven.
Jun 2012 · 923
Loving You
Maddie Bukowsky Jun 2012
Loving you is like a dream, I don't even know if it's real.
Loving you is like a choice, to display how I really feel.
Loving you is like a game, fighting so we will not lose.
Loving you is like a contest, I'm clueless as to who you will choose.
Loving you is like a rainstorm, certain days it will be bittersweet.
Loving you is like a test, and how tempting it may be to cheat.
Loving you is like a band-aid, repairing the awful bleed.
Loving you is oh so easy, because you are all I need.
Jun 2012 · 828
In Memory of Brittany
Maddie Bukowsky Jun 2012
I knew a girl; but not just any girl.
Her story was more intriguing than any fairytale,
Her worth far above rubies and pearls,
Her strength far more powerful than 100 soldiers,
Her beauty far more radiant than a dozen fresh roses,
Her love far greater than the tenderness of a caring friend,
Her dreams far more valuable than all the gold in the world,
but her emotions she kept hidden.
Afraid to let her guard down, for she was a rock to those around her.
To many she was a mystery, a spectacular puzzle of a person.
I still hear her laugh.
Rest in Paradise, sweet sister.

— The End —