most of the world doesn't make sense to me
like the way strangers with cozy eyes and half smiles
often keep nice words to themselves
or the way the flowers i pick
and put in pretty vases on display
die so quickly
or how my cuts and scrapes from small mistakes
take so long to heal

I was once told that loneliness was a virtue,
a gift,
the only way to prevent the pain of misguided company
and company that always departs
I was once told to protect myself,
build up walls and set up guards
I did
I was once told that this is the only way to prevent suffering,
it wasn't until I built up walls and set up guards that fought off misguided conversations and departing company
that I realized they were wrong

I hope you're listening
to all my twisted words
and seeing all my
broken thoughts spilled on the paper
although I never got them quite right,
they'll always be about you

As the sky began to fade to a lighter shade
the stars bid their farewell
and the ones that fell to the earth
took all my wishes with them
and 11:12 laminated my disappointment
you're still over there
and I'm still here