I walked along the rough and rugged road
Traveled farther than the walking dead
Bearing the heaviest, the worst of loads
My hands are strong; forever stained with red

And carrying the burden of the ****
That I committed; seared into my mind
Reminding me that one day I'll fulfill
The contract with death that remains unsigned

And as I step into his cold embrace
Death releases me from my tightening chain
No longer apart of the living race
Once again I see the man that I have slain

And as I flow into the deadly dances
I know at last that I am out of chances

When I was at the scene,
A man perishing at my feet,
Yet nothing could be done.
Ignorance was on my side.

A man perishing at my feet,
A curtain of water separated him from me,
Ignorance was on my side,
In the aftermath I imagine him choking, gasping for my help.

A curtain of water separated him from me,
I couldn't see him, I couldn't hear him,
In the aftermath I imagine him choking, gasping for my help,
In the moment he and I had drowned in my innocence.

I couldn't see him, I couldn't hear him,
He called to me, but his voice was one I was destined never to hear.
In the moment he and I were drowning in my innocence.
Waves pounded the distant shore, solitude and silence in their clamor.

He called to me, but his voice was one I was destined never to hear,
I had been the only presence, his only hope.
Waves pounded the distant shore, solitude and silence in their clamor.
If I was his hope, did I **** him?

I had been the only presence, his only hope.
Later I was to learn of his death.
If I was his hope, did I **** him?
Does his ****** hang on my soul?

Later I was to learn of his death,
The death of a man whose name and face I will never know.
Does his ****** hang on my soul?
Will my life forever be tied to his?

The death of a man whose name and face I will never know,
The pain of my actions will remain painted on my mind.
Will my life forever be tied to his?
I changed my life that day, and stole another's.

The pain of my actions will remain painted on my mind,
Like abstract shapes dancing in my eyes.
I changed my life that day, and stole another's,
When I was at the scene.

I see the world all around me.
But if I reach out to touch it,
I'm afraid it will just disappear.
Vanish away from my fingertips.
That reach out in curiosity.
If I reach out,
Will the world disappear?
Hiding it's secrets from me.
When all I want to know is...
Do I exist?
Or am I as false as the clouds above me?

Writers need inspiration
They need a source of wonder
To tap into their pen
They need the perfect string of words
Aroused from just a glance
They need a sight so beautiful
And that feeling when you fall
They need that sense of danger
Prickling behind their soul
They need a dash of wisdom
That flashes by unseen
They need a dose of clarity
To reach from within
They need to search under their dreams
And find the words tucked away
Writers need inspiration

Rambunctious thoughts race through a mind already cluttered with worries.

He wonders if this will relieve his pain, brought on by years of abuse.

He shifts his feet curiously on the edge, still not allowing his eyes the freedom of glancing at the street below.

His balance is almost lost when the wind blows in flurries.

He has been a ticking time bomb all these years, and now they have lit his fuse.

Pedestrians gather at the bottom of the building, ready for the gruesome show,
          Then, he
                           j
                              u
                                  m
                                       p
                                          s.

It's dark, but you can see.
                                  You're alone, but it's not lonely.
You're cornered, but nothing is chasing you.
                               It's scary, but that is nothing new.
Here is where the truth begins to bend,
                                  Here is where the honesty ends.

I am brave.
But it helps when you are brave for me.
I am beautiful.
But I am more beautiful with you next to me.
I am strong.
But I am stronger when you hold me up.
I am kind.
But I'm kinder when I'm in your arms.
I can be scared.
But I am less so with you near.
I hold on.
But my grip is tighter with you holding on too.
I can stand up for myself.
But it's good to have you on my side too.
I love you.
But it's easier when you love me too.

I hate how I cannot help you,
When you cower from my hand.
I hate how I cannot even find you,
When I know you need me most.
I hate how you push me away,
When all I want is to protect you.
I hate that you cannot trust me,
When I wait with open ears.
I hate knowing how scared you must be,
Out in the dim truth by yourself.
I hate when I cry your tears,
Because you cannot cry your own.
I hate how you make me feel,
When all I do is love you.

I stared into the sky.
But the stars didn't tell me anything.
Like you told me.
You told me they wouldn't whisper.

But the stars didn't tell me anything.
Like you told me.
You told me they wouldn't whisper.
But I didn't believe you.

Like you told me.
You told me they wouldn't whisper.
But I didn't believe you.
So I stared into the stars anyways.

You told me they wouldn't whisper.
But I didn't believe you.
So I stared into the stars anyways.
I reached out my hand like I could touch them.

But I didn't believe you.
So I stared into the stars anyways.
I reached out my hand like I could touch them.
I felt their heat on my fingers.

So I stared into the stars anyways.
I reached out my hand like I could touch them.
I felt their heat on my fingers.
But I knew I was too far away.

I reached out my hand like I could touch them.
I felt their heat on my fingers.
But I knew I was too far away.
Too far away for me to touch you.

I felt their heat on my fingers.
But I knew I was too far away.
Too far away for me to touch you.
And that seemed to hurt my heart.

But I knew I was too far away.
Too far away for me to touch you.
And that seemed to hurt my heart.
It hurt that I couldn't reach you.

Too far away for me to touch you.
And that seemed to hurt my heart.
It hurt that I couldn't reach you.
So I looked up.

And that seemed to hurt my heart.
It hurt that I couldn't reach you.
So I looked up.
I stared into the sky.

It hurt that I couldn't reach you.
So I looked up.
I stared into the sky.
But the stars didn't tell me anything.

So I looked up.
I stared into the sky.
But the stars didn't tell me anything.
Like you told me.

I stared into the sky.
But the stars didn't tell me anything.
Like you told me.
You told me they wouldn't whisper.

You are always there, waiting,
Waiting for me to pour my heart out.
Out come the desperate words.
Words of my innocent vanities,
Vanities that consume me.
Me, who you can always trust,
Trust me,  for I,
I know that hearts can get too full.
Full with your own toils, and mine.
So pour your heart out to me,
I know sometimes they get too full.

I'm going.
Going fast.
Fast running.
Running hard.
Hard work.
Work as hard as I will for you.
You laugh.
Laugh as you may, I'm not alone.
Alone is something I am not.
Not scared.
Scared of nothing.
Nothing important enough.
Enough to **** me?
Me, who's death is intimate?
Yes.

When the stars fall from the heavens
They burn up in our sky
Leaving a cold, twinkling flake
If you stretch out your hand, they dissolve into nothing
They land in your hair and shimmer on your clothing
When they touch the ground they leave an endless carpet of white
If you look closely, you can see they all have millions of colors inside them
And they all have different patterns for beauty
They are called snowflakes.

People are like flowers
Blooming when they're ready
Showing off all their beauty
People are like stars
They glow brighter and brighter
Boasting all their power
People are like books
Sharing their story to all who listen
Hiding all their secrets
People are like love
They have their ups and downs
But they always prosper in the end

The clocks hands shift,
Shortening my life.
Yet dulling my pain.
For my shoulders carry everything,
That none would lift.
I have seen much strife,
And such has become my bane.
The tick of the seconds past, yet my ears still ring.

She listens
And though she is right beside me
She is a million miles away in thought
And yet she listens
She still somehow hears what I say
Even though
She is a million miles away in thought
Her emotions are paper thin
And her charade is opaque
She is easily broken
From her mindless stupor
And yet she listens
To the troubled words of a troubled mind
And yet she listens
To the sorrowful twang of teenage vanities
And yet she listens
To the colors and the smells of burning candles
She listens to the feel of skin on paper
She listens to the cloyingly sweet emotions
Drifting off where no one else can hear them
And yet she listens
To taped-back-together-but-so-far-apart souls
Desperate not to be blown away

No one is waiting
So I'll just keep pacing
Pacing till I wear a hole in the floor
Cause there's nothing left to live for anymore
There is no one left to see
There is no one but me

No one is waiting
So I'll just keep standing, rooted to the ground
They may be gone
But I'll still stand there at dawn
Of tomorrow, of next year
I won't stop, I have no fear

No one is waiting
So I'll just keep fighting
My will is strong
And this fight will be long
I can't bring them back to me
But I can channel them into who I will be

No one is waiting
So I'll just keep screaming
Screaming through the cold night
Screaming until the first light
When they come
Whether there be many, or only some

No one is waiting
So I'll just keep bleeding
Cause they broke my will
So now my blood will spill
But I will still be waiting
Waiting for the others to come

I know they won't come,
Cause I couldn't save them when they cried for me
But I will still wait
I will still pace
I will still stand, rooted to the ground
I will still fight
I will still scream
I will still bleed
I will live
Even though they wish me to die
I refuse
For my will is strong.

Grab on.
On the journey we must take.
Take nothing.
Nothing will be there.
There, where time unravels.
Unravels our lives.
Lives that can be lived again.
Again and again, we take the journey.
Journey to love.
Love what you must, but leave it at home.
Home is where we will head after.
After we show them time.
Time lasts forever.
Forever is our love.
Love that has been unraveled, and sewn back together.
Together forever.
Forever.
Forever.
Forever it goes on.
On the journey we must take.

I used to find pain
Behind every withered memory
Hiding under every word
Creeping alongside my laughter
But I have been opened
And the pain that lingered inside
Has taken flight like a startled crow
A black shadow against the black night
I appear to have been opened
And sweet things are trickling in
Where the pain used to be
They fill my soul
Not make it deeper
They touch my wounds
But do not hurt them
These sweet things that taste of honey
Smell of spring
And look like life
Repair my withered memories
Enhance my every word
And laugh alongside me
I don't know what the sweet things are
But they grow on me
And do not consume me
Now I have forgotten the pain
I remember what the sweet things are
They aren't love, they aren't happiness
They are little pieces of **velvet stars

Floating through the depths of a soulless wonderland.

Memories fast fading from my mind.

I try to catch them in my hands  but they  rush through my fingers like sand .

Searching behind clouds and under dreams for something I can never find.

I weave  new memories with strands of  admitted love

With dirtied hands I feel my way out of the darkness, with unexpected twists and bends

Tipping back my head to look at the light dripping in from above

I continue to maneuver out of the uninterrupted nightmares until forever ends

When I cry,
I try not to brush away the tears.
Instead I pull my hair behind my ears,
To make way for the cascade of years.

I wish I could fly
                         Fly to worlds unknown
Unknown only to me
                                  Me, who lives
Lives every day alone
                                 Alone, with no wings
Wings of perfection
                   Perfection is what I wish
Wish for them to accept
                                  Accept me
Me who is not enough
                             Enough to fly
Fly to worlds unknown.