I saw in my soul's window a million paranoid, knowing eyeballs resonate apocalypse planned as total fate

Saw a million lonely, scared faces seek to vibe with one aesthetic

Knew totality, balance, show hate, kindness, in the marshes of beyond

Surrender--final threshold to the Almighty Wisdom of Creation

Knew all the petty footfalls born in all personal hells

Wandered All before & After

Found myself still & unknowing

Realized ultimate futility & saw & knew the Eye that shivers with mistrust--symptom of essential human error--done collapsing

Tried to be transceiver for total consciousness,visions, intuitions, serpents of inbetween places, all dialed into the same direct knowing posture outward, upward, sideways & nowhere

Sought to riddle my apostrophes in the dream market, in the blind bank or else Jericho my soul to stall my own progression

To reveal a face
Is to disrupt
The gentle slow roll barrage
To show a concealed instant
The mask dies away
In old growth misery decay
When hair & belly
Like a costume folding
United with unknown cause
Who has invented
The receding plaster
Mindful eyes
Wet portraiture
Individualized
Self-conscious stranger
You are  a repetition
And a contradiction
Cells bloom like
Palm patterns
Maps limited in form
Without whatever
Mimics Henrietta
To intrusions
Conscientious tales
Who told from
Up on great heights
No reason to imagine
A resistance
Painful recreation
Sell me your blind light
I call you out of mine

Your body now
Is like an ancient ocean
Full of strange life
& unfamiliar motion
Call me to rest
Down in the silt & salt
Among the primal patterns
Of your skin
Images of light
Bring me across the ages
To a face that I have seen
One trillion times
In dreams
Of nowhere
And of now
Your chest is
Like a wildfire
Feeding on the dark
Bring me down
Into the badlands
Of your fists
Send me snaking
Up your shattered cliffs
I’m painted well
Around your spiral
Wear me like a chain
And I’ll find all the ways
To move along your collar
& roll your bones
Around my brain
All the cobras
Of your hair
Waiting to be known
Your own inventions
What is shown
Take me to the
Forests of your eyes
& bury me
Beneath the tree of vines

The was no joy in her dance
As she spun around the pole
Hips like icebergs
Carving up the scenery
Thick with
Ammonia and bleach
She wore
Black lipstick
Underwear and eyeliner
Like a wounded dog
Eyes sunk into a marsh
Looking out at nothing
As I sit and watch
Her loveless display
And wonder
Why she can’t be
What I picture
In my mind
Her *** is like a
Tiny sun
Swaying in the void
Warping gravity
Bending light
Fixing gazes
Earning dollars
I want to
Take her arms apart
And build her
A blue island
There is no one else
But me
Watching her
Loving her
With museum love
The way you love a
Picture
Or a concept
Knowing full well
What it isn’t

Don’t you want to
Achieve the vision
He said with eyes
So crystal blue
We can see it
Written on your
Face I sense
No connection
To these people
We can all be
Top performers
If we elevate
One another
Hey your onions
Cut too small
This is me
Elevating you
I smell onions
And tortillas
And vegetables
Oil dishwater
Carbon on the
Grill top scrapings
She has got some
Vague expectation
Written on her smear
Life is like a
Postage stamp
Her makeup is
Too thick crossing
Over leopard print
Tattoo underneath
Her left arm
Message managers
Are wondering what’s
Wrong with you
My gentle restaurateur
You and your wife
Are wondering why
A child this June
Another restaurateur
A new store opens
Every two days
Like a virus spreading
Smiles of cold blue skin
I dreamt last night
My breathless image
Of being caught
Inside an elevator
Of an old casino
I was parked on the
28th floor security
Was out to get me
I want to be
The tired reason
Your brand new magic
Realization
The dream you
Don’t wake up from
I want to fall into
Flesh disappearing
From the white spots
Of your eyes
No sounds heard
Settling in your head
Spread out among
The cold far reaches
Of your yesses
Coagulate like
Hot black venom
In your fingers
Be drawn into
The cracked corners
Of your lips like
Raised beds of
Cacti in the sun
Holy stolen
In your boots
I am no sinner
Cast me thru the
Farmlands of the
Black seed
I am going
Home to where
Your eagle’s waiting
Eyes of plenty
Vines that
Creep among
The tangled people
In their fever dream
Announcing lampshade
Shadows holding
Form from in the
Broken molding
Here I watch my
Not-self wonder
At the wretched
Timeline of reactionary
Heroes
Tired old mothers
Wandering up the stairs
To their misfortunes
Glasses brought back
Full of orange juice and water
I am drawn upon
A silver second
Lost into a fog
She is obvious in
The way that she is leaving
I am almost out of
Oatmeal and songs
Silver for my floors
Time evaporates
This instant
Like a clean and subtle
Memory of everything
You say or do or wake to
All your riches and your fables
Are a lamb sworn
Into custody
Of the same slate asylum
Battered boats near docks
Knocking water
Into snake holes
Wandered under
Painted bridges
Holding no collapse
Spending hours and days
Washed up on drowsy
Shoreline nettles
Chipping flint stone fire
Extinguished under floodlights

The stench of stale tobacco
Has seeped into the plaster
In the time since my departure
The oven needs a washing
Noodle bits hang on the burner like time clings to itself
& memories unrelenting haunt me as I walk the hall
Where claws tore holes in carpet leading to your room
Where the bushes outside your window erupted under an unnatural sky
In the summer getting drunk on heat
Springtime turning into winter’s bones where banks of snow were catapulting
Cars in slow motion volleys of thought which showed
Something unutterable in their stillness
Hot tea shoveling that white Indian
Headdress of yours I found
Hung on the broken oil lamp now busted by some drunkard
As the springtime turned into windows
Sheltered neighbors in the spray-painted garage
And you never swept the floor
In the morning the cat would make it known
That he was only animal seeking freedom of the soul
And in time he and I would yowl in unison
Deliberately writing off those subtle energies
Too difficult to define in images
Met me halfway in the garden
Where your weeds and roses twist
With your hedges overgrown
& the grassy clover crickets
Uncut all year long
I want to clean your dishes
I want to sweep your floor
I want to vacuum up the crumbs we both left on the floor
I want to scrub the toilet and the sink
I want the smell of Lysol in my pores
I want the bleach to **** the mildew
I want to cultivate a habit
I want you to let me get to work
But you refuse my offer
As you light another smoke
& throw the pack to the floor
Your ash tray is overflowing

I don’t know where to start

She tells me she can’t write anymore
I know that isn’t true
I see her poems and they are pretty good
Better than most
She says she’s lost her spark
And justifies her own astrology
To me
Yesterday
I saw a blue bud light can aluminum
Rolling down Dix highway
Looking like a sapphire jewel sparkling
I almost misspelled jewel
I feel like my eyes are out of focus
I cannot think as clearly
After a giant coffee
Everyday
People hate to read their work
Or speak their minds
I am looking to be justified
For what?
I am looking for a ritualistic catharsis
Out of myself
I am becoming a better everything
I tell myself
I am in line with the will of the goddess
I now think
I look for the winking face or knowing smile
Of eternity in the back of a pickup truck
In front of me in traffic
They can reach you anywhere
I see the blue eagle sweeping out of a dream
And recognize his strange form
I put on a leather jacket someone left at my house and decide that I will keep it
I feel cool when I go out to the movies wearing it
I smoke a lot of **** and watch a movie
And try to have no expectations

Whenever the Hunger ceases
I shall be dead
I shall want for nothing
We cannot see the end yet
Today is just a featureless poison
What meat from in the vegetable kingdom?
What pause have the sailors given you?
How many heartbreaks must we endure?
That place every man knows
Hints at transformation
The moment we can't speak about
Words just don't touch it
What did you see this ordinary day?
Aren't people all the same?
What do you think?
Can you pinpoint my mercy?
Or tell a real smile?
From beneath dim lights
Where's your humanity? Encased in leather?
Do you rule your world?
What do flowers look like?
Are you afraid to say brother?
We can forgive each other right now
Right in this moment
Oh but you're afraid to say brother
Or maybe you don't know how
The man on the corner is as suspicious of us as we are of him
Isn't it all too familiar?
What's he really asking for?
How much does your humanity cost you?

When was the last time you cried over your mother
We're all mothers and bums
stranded on our own street corners
w/grim looks/jaundice eyes
waiting for recognition
something to happen
Everything flowing past
Cars following cars out of town
Into the house-up the driveway
Into a parking lot
A drive-thru next to a dumpster
We can have everything we want
If we cease wanting everything
Belief is half the struggle
In this effort of completion
Can you feel the weight of things?
Here as they are
As they have always been and always will be
It's just us
You've got something on your mind
Something you're not saying
but there isn't much time left to say it
And it'd make all of the difference