I became so addicted to the feeling of nothing
that when I started to feel you
I went through withdrawals.
I wanted so desperately to forget about
the nice feelings that ran through my mind
when I thought of you,
because I became so intimate with being alone
that leaving the vast isolation of myself behind
felt like I was killing the part of me
that taught me how to survive.

A chronic sickness,
So sick in the head.
Lost in my hate,
Getting pleasure from dread.
What you have done to me, 
I am so grateful.
Made me cold, disconnected, 
This feeling, so sweet.
Before I was weak, in every eye and heart.
With just a few words I was torn apart.
With what you've done I'm not right in the head,
My feelings are pushed into something else, 
Lust, anger, and numbness instead.
Thank you for making me mad.
So completely insane.
Life seems so much better, 
Without a functioning brain...