little dark girl with
kind eyes
when it comes time to
use the knife
I won't flinch and
i won't blame
you,
as I drive along the shore alone
as the palms wave,
the ugly heavy palms,
as the living does not arrive
as the dead do not leave,
i won't blame you,
instead
i will remember the kisses
our lips raw with love
and how you gave me
everything you had
and how I
offered you what was left of
me,
and I will remember your small room
the feel of you
the light in the window
your records
your books
our morning coffee
our noons our nights
our bodies spilled together
sleeping
the tiny flowing currents
immediate and forever
your leg my leg
your arm my arm
your smile and the warmth
of you
who made me laugh
again.
little dark girl with kind eyes
you have no
knife. the knife is
mine and i won't use it
yet.

Deep within me I press rewind
and beyond the calm lies choices
that take every part of me
and find the days when my memories
lay my soul bare.
This is when I remember taking fire
when I walked as a child,
always feeling
I was never too young
to know what was mine
even a thousand years ago.

I know the name
of the one I see in the mirror
and that she is called by an ancient feeling
staring into infinity
as she pleases.  
She holds on to the sands
of the deepest abyss
until each grain
falls under her trance
and  is prepared to fight
every other whisper
other than her own.

Every single day,
I drink the warm tears attempting
to control my smile
while realizing how much I need  
to touch the ground
above my shadow.
Soon my mind is filled
with the loneliness of winds.
I know I can move beyond them
and can always keep them
from filling my soul.

Drops of rain come full circle
making ready
to sweep across the crest of my fears
reminding me
I have fought distance and ghosts
on journeys slow to end.
My spirit is not brittle
and I will remain inspired
even when I press rewind
and my memories
lay my soul bare
once again.