Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
Oct 2012 · 1.5k
Boys...
Lover of Words Oct 2012
Boys, Boys, Boys,
Likable, lovable,or lonely,
Some are completely despicable,
You got those hard ***** who are too strong for love, or who will just lead ya on, making you think thoughts you shouldn't about them and
Making you want them more then you should,
Or you got those babies, the ones who refuse to actually grow some *****,
The ones who ask you to forgive them of their weaknesses,
Their shortcomings and their downfalls,
Like seriously?
I'm a girl, not a leaning post who you can depend upon,
Ok, maybe if I knew you more,
But still like, really?
The ones who refuse to make a move, like even afraid to touch you,
What? Do I have cooties or something,
Hold my hand, or hold me,
Come on!
Then you got those ones who don't even know how to communicate,
Or say something worth hearing,  
Please I've heard it all,
How cute and adorable I am,
The Goddess, a queen, labeling me to be one who I'm not,
I'm a human being, one of you!
Last time I checked I was a mortal, not some model of perfection,
But to be put on such a pedestal is simply too much.
So come on guys, get a grip and learn how to stand up for yourselves,
Don't pretend I'm something more then I'm not,
It aint going to work,
I want you as a friend, then a lover, but the crushes are constantly crushing my hopes and dreams of finding that one prince charming
Oct 2012 · 2.1k
19 Years
Lover of Words Oct 2012
19 years of boring days,
19 years of tears,
19 years of things drastically falling apart and never making any sense,
that is 19 years of trying to figure things out, like my body, and who the heck am I?
19 years of loving any guy who dare speak to me,
and 19 years of heartache figuring out that they didn't love me back,
19 years of dreaming and reading and wondering,
19 years of thinking, about everything really,
About God, and life, and why in the world am I here,
and 19 years of drawing,
19 years of human pain, like that time I had to get surgery for a broken leg,
Then there is a ton of mental and emotional pain, like heart break,
And other ****,
19 years of loving my family and friends for being there in my desperate times of despair,
And 19 years of not realizing that they were there the whole entire time,
19 years of trying to find my unrealistic and perfect Mr. Darcy,
which of course does not exist, well to my knowledge at least,
19 years of crushes on all the wrong guys,
And 19 years of never acknowledging the prime and proper ones who were gonna treat me right,
19 years of having to schoolwork, and now in college its more work then I have ever imagined,
And sometimes I just break down and cry because the stress of it all is depleting me of all my energy and time,
19 years of not knowing how to function around certain people, like at all sometimes,
And 19 years of having some of the greatest friends in the world to go out with on random nights to smoke hookah,
19 years of happy days,
And 19 years of having your heart ripped out of your chest and beaten on the side of the road until it can barely beat anymore,
19 years of having sucky days that make you want to jump off a cliff and **** yourself, or anybody at all really,
Like the first person you wake up in the morning and dares speak to you,
19 years of feeling tired, like every day,
19 years of eating delicious junk food, drinking water, laughing so hard I can't even breath, spilling coffee, talking so fast I forget what I am even saying and slipping up on everything.
19 years of foul plays and just really bad mistakes that you thought were gonna turn out good, but hit you really hard in the face,
So 19 birthdays to celebrate all these crazy and silly happenings that make me wanna go insane,
But I'm not so sure where I be without it all, without
Oct 2012 · 1.3k
Kiss Me.
Lover of Words Oct 2012
Kiss me,
Like now,
Like hard,
And intense and meaningful,
Mean it,
Do it, without me asking,
For God sakes,
Embrace me, if you fear that I'll refuse then you are so wrong,
For I want you to,
I want you to show that which you feel,
Let the fireworks fly,
Grab me suddenly, up and around, twirl me and make my insides soar,
Like take those hands and grip onto me for dear life,
Then tilt that head down,
Towards my lips,
And slowly without hesitation, let those lips lock onto mine,
Last for awhile,
Like a few minutes or so,
Something you know, memorable,
That we can tell our grandkids about someday,
And maybe change the world with to
Oct 2012 · 1.1k
I need you now.
Lover of Words Oct 2012
I just wanna be kissed by you,
Again,
Because when I did life made sense,
Not everything was so messy as they are now,
Life wasn't so scattered.
I didn't have a job or homework load as high as the mountains,
I just had you,
And that was all I needed,
Now,
I need that,
Thats all I need,
A kiss,
But not from just anybody's lips,
I wanna look up into your eyes and you automatically now that I need kissing badly,
And that feeling of knowing that life is gonna be ok and I'm gonna make it because someone else out there actually is fond of me even if I don't always look right, which is a rare occasion nowadays.
And when I'm bruised and hurt from a long day of useless work, it's ok because the warmth of your scrawny body is enough,
So just know I crave your mouth on mine,
Expressing affection that I need so **** badly,
I need more than air to keep my heart alive, for right now it's operating only on lies that boys keep trying to tell me,
"Your pretty, your perfect, your wonderful,"
In the back of my mine,
Why are they wasting my time when they barely know me…
But you know me so well, and when to kiss me, which i need right now
No matter how foolish or stupid that sounds,
I need you now
And those lips to tell me how much I matter
Oct 2012 · 1.3k
Art is hard.
Lover of Words Oct 2012
I hate those anti-artists.
Those ones who draw to be artistic,
The ones who try but fail to be a Van Gogh or Picasso,
Those men didn't try,
They were a work of art themselves,
Art isn't a hobby,
It's a lifestyle,
It's a passion, and point of existence for some. It's reason and resolution
Not a play thing,
You can't just be an art major,
You have to strive to be it,
Full blood and sweat and tears pouring ones heart into it,
I hate those who think art is hard, too hard,
And I can't stand those people who take art because it's supposed to be fun or easy…
Easy?
You think Michelangelo enjoyed painting on his back for months from dawn to dusk,
You think its fun to be broke from art supply expenses?
You think its cool to see things differently from everyone else? Or to be so socially awkward it's difficult to function in crowds
Being a artist is an emotional journey of self discovery,
And those brushes and paints help us along the way,
Our creative minds are so busy and potent and powerful that if we didn't draw we burst from all the ideas gathering up,
We explode!
So art is not what we do to get attention,
Its what makes us feel important and worthy inside,
Whether we get notice or not
And if God willing we will...
I'm sorry if i offended anyone, but I go to school with too many of these people that frustrate the crap out of me!
Oct 2012 · 1.6k
Getting to know you.
Lover of Words Oct 2012
We began talking,
You know the process of getting to know one another,
But I'm not good at talking,
Flirting I can do,
But talk?
About what?
About our futures and passions and powers,
Our past and present and our potentials...
The political debates and our crumbling state of mind,
How we don't get enough sleep or how that irritating idea of waking up from our slumber,
Sure talking is great,
But it isn't real, ya know?
Like I can talk all I want and you wouldn't get to know anymore about me then you don't already know,
I mean, if you wanna get to know me, spend a day with me, read my diary, be more then just a friend,
Make me spill the beans and confess my broken dreams,
I mean talking won't get me to do that,
You gotta open me up,
Cut through all my damage,
Look past my scar tissue,
Force me to depend upon you,
Thats how I'll ever start to get to love you...
Lover of Words Oct 2012
I want you not.
No, my heart can beat without you,
So I don't yearn so desperately for you, I wake not in the middle of the night waiting for you, not able to sleep until I see you,
I wait not at my phone wanting you to call me whispering words of earnest and encouragement,
Never do I walk around the park wondering where you are,
But I need you,
As stupid as it sounds,
You may not consume my every thought,
But your existence is vital to mine.
And I did not want nor ask for this.
But my heart and every heartbeat are in vain for living without you is impossible
For though I can go on not wanting you,
I am so utterly and desperately in need of you more then I have ever wanted to be or even should,
Nobody should need somebody so terribly,
But I regrettably do,
For without you a 'Me' would be well, a worthless ******* without meaning,
But with a you, that me has a purpose,
Though it not be finite or ideal,
It is a purpose whatsoever,
Although I should not need you so **** much,
Especially since you seem to be living life just fine without me,
But my thoughts and pounding heart  go on in the hope that one day you will actually need me,
As I have been in so long of need of you
Oct 2012 · 1.3k
Me.
Lover of Words Oct 2012
Me.
She was a sad, sad girl, with eyes of glittering diamonds,
You know, electrifying and incarcerating,
Piercing the light,
She had hope despite the fire that burn, burn, burn so deep inside her,
That burning pain she felt when friends abandoned her and boys kept replacing her every week,
But despite the heartache and the long days she kept on going,
breathing in and out,
slowly,
Take the awful and miserable thoughts elsewhere,
deviate the pain, with love,
Find those who care and spend time with them,
Drink a cup of hot cocoa and forget,
Thats what she did,
And those ever permeating eyes kept on searching heartily for another,
Despite the agony and rips and tears she kept on getting,
She wasn't giving up,
Not yet,
Not just yet,
Despite the sensitivity she had and the naivety of how the horrible world worked, not yet,
Not yet,
So she kept on smiling in the rain,
Maybe she find someone to kiss her in it to one day
So boys continued on with their games and she continually would lose them,
And girls…let's just say they weren't dependable people…
So off on her own,
Walking along the road alone,
And sometimes she actually preferred it to be this way
Oct 2012 · 1.5k
Confessions from a Crush
Lover of Words Oct 2012
So i, maybe, sorta,
like you?
Oh wait, you didn't hear that,
I mean…
Unless you feel the same…
But that could be irrelevant,
I mean what would that matter.
Do you?
I mean, like share the same sorta bubbles I got going on,
Like for me,
My heart sorta goes a flutter,
And I can't help the palpitations and the eruptions you've been causing within my little drum,
Is it just a crush?
Or could it be at all love?
Whatever the hell that is…
But come on,
Dear…
I've never called anyone that,
Is that weird?
Or am I mad,
I just look at you, and my brain goes insane, craving you without caution, or thoughts of the repercussions that I ever wanted you to be mine,
I mean maybe you never will be mine,
Not that I mean to possess you of course,
But I wanna hug you, and look at you every day and call you pretty,
Ugh…what's going on here?
I mean I never have ever wanted to do that to anyone…
Once again a thought of you comes up, and I cannot suppress that thought,
I encourage it,
I enjoy it,
A thought of you makes me smile uncontrollably,
I don't know if that makes me unmanly, or anything, but for some reason I don't give a ****,
Unless you do of course…
Lover of Words Oct 2012
You are my morning cup of coffee,
My hot, steamy, caffeinated beverage made to wake me up,
I sip you,
Bitter,
Some sugar to cheer you up?
I dowse you in vanilla cream…
Any better my darling?
How come you are so nasty?
Not a morning person either?
Well I can't blame you,
Why do I think I drink so much of you?
Because I like you?
Well I do,sorta, the effects you bring to me are quite uplifting,
I shake,
Nervously,
Oh you startle me and delight me,
I feel comforted as you break open into my bloodstream,
My body on fire and ready to start my long and trying day,
Maybe we can get through this together,
Another cup is what I think I need of you,
Whether bitter or not we can make it through,
So my little cappuccino, so frothy and frilly,
I want you to know that I need you,
Like to start my morning, my every morning
Whether you are just black, or a venti latte with skim and carmel syrup stirred inside,
Or else I be stuck in bed all the time
There be no you to keep me awake or alive,
No reason to go outside and try,
No motivator, no mover, just me living my days on my own,
How terribly depressing I must add,
So I'll keep you company if you keep on stirring my brain with your caffeinated ways
Oct 2012 · 6.9k
Disney Dreams
Lover of Words Oct 2012
Is it wrong to want a Disney romance?
That may seem a bit silly to say,
But really now,
Who doesn't want a prince to come sing sweet melodies,
"I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream",
Like seriously,
Inside I be screaming "Marry me!"
Unfortunately, my life is not like that, at all,
I'm scrubbing floors like Cinderella cept I don't have a fairy godmother to help me off to my ball,
I am the little red headed mermaid splashing around, ******* down saltwater, glancing up at Eric,
wondering if he'll ever see me,
Yep, I'm Belle alright, reading every night,
Stuck in her dreams, hoping Gaston will quit bothering me,
Gosh! I want my beast already,
I want my star to grant my wish,
That the spell would break from true loves kiss,
But either way I'm still here, living with some dwarves cleaning up after them,
Lucky *******,
Hold up, that's not a very Disney thing to say.
Either way,
Disney got it right,
We girls just want to be saved,
Well I mean, I do,
I don't know about the rest of you,
Prince Charming can you just give me back my shoe,
My heart is your's in return, I promise,
Yeah, that's me waiting, wanting, wishing like always
Oct 2012 · 1.6k
I can be me around you
Lover of Words Oct 2012
I wanna fight with you,
I wanna argue and say horrible mean things to you,
I wanna hurt you,
Disregard your existence
Make you go insane,
Point out all your flaws in the name of love,
And then throw glass at you,
Raise our voices in extreme fury,
Fight me,
Break me,
Burn me,
Make me know that you want me,
For God sakes if I don't know I'm leaving,
I'll quit,
I'll run out the door into another's arms if you don't make me feel like I matter,
*******,
Go!
Get out of here,
And grop that girl you met last night,
I don't need you,
Even though I love you,
Even though I can rip open my chest and expose that which I've kept hidden for year,
Yeah the scar tissue shows,
Not pretty,
I know,
I can't do that with Dan, or Connor, or Brandon or Matt,
If they saw the ugliness underneath I never would hear from them again,
But with you,
With your patience and understanding I cannot feel anymore at home,
Isn't that the feeling ones suppose to feel,
Real?
I feel like I can be absolutely real,
Like the DNA can unravel and unwind,
I don't have to hid anymore,
Not with you, or around you,
I can be me!
I'm just a bit afraid that you're the only one I can find,
The only one that I can ever be with,
The only one who would make me feel completely and utterly whole…
Make sense?
Oct 2012 · 940
Don't You Give Up
Lover of Words Oct 2012
This is a poem,
This is a poem like other poems,
But this poem I dedicate to you,
And it's not a single certain somebody,
But to all of those you's,
Those you's whose dreams are just on the edge of coming true,
You see these are the you's that need to keep on going,
No matter how much life hurts you,
And with each passing day you begin to lose hope of any virtue,
You see, the you's have to keep going, have to keep on writing,
They have to keep searching,
The have to just keep breathing, no matter the pain that each inhale and exhale take,
Just don't let it break you,
You see these you's see suffer, not in vain,
But for their brilliant brains, that are like sparkling diamonds amongst the bitter cold coals that lay dead,
They are the ones who are worth it, they are the ones who see happiness, rather then ever having it,
They put it in place of something else,
The you's put up walls because their heart has already been broken,
And they won't let you in,
See they hold back everything,
For such a silly thing, like maybe hope, or healing, or if they are really crazy love,
Or maybe just someone to pay them a small bit of attention,
See these you's see the world through their own eyes,
Their own ways,
And they won't let them touch you,
And if someone whose special ruins it for them,
Well that would perhaps **** everything,
But they  wouldn't die,
They learn to somehow survive
So that's what you'll do,
You pick up the pieces they broke off and reattach,
Soon you'll be good as new
And continue chasing those silly butterflies
No matter how far away from home they fly,
I hope to God, that you's like you will still try
Lover of Words Oct 2012
I love you, honestly, but for now give me peace,
Go away for awhile and let me be,
I need my brain to rest,
I love you, I truly do,
But get away from me for sometime,
I need to sorta reboot or recharge and live in absolute solitude,
Be gone I ask! Let me alone, I need to figure why I'm so emotional,
So leave me, for a moment, and come back soon!
I beg of you to let me go on my own,
I don't need people to keep my going,
I want them for awhile and then I like to live solely,
So just let me go,
Hold me, love me, then just leave to allow me to realize how much I miss you,
Go!
But don't forget me, love, don't ever forget me when I'm gone,
When I've inhabited my mind, and lost all interest in time,
I get bored, so come after me and retrieve me from all my loneliness
Oct 2012 · 1.1k
Forgive my love
Lover of Words Oct 2012
I wanna lie…without a thought in my ever wandering mind…in your arms…tonight
And I ask, if at all that I am wrong to want such from you
If I am crossing boundaries that should not be crossed,
Then I beg, please just forgive, the leaking heart that keeps on giving so much love to you
But if you want the same, then do not keep it hidden,
Expose that which you have been forced to withhold,
For I cannot want this gold anymore,
Too many others have a somebody,
I have a nobody, but a vain hope
And a crossing that may lead to an ending to our relationship.
It's you I've desired above all else,
You, I wanted above every dream that set my heart on fire,
Is it love?
Or am I fool for ever wanting you?
Do not answer with words!
I beg, just please hold me for a night instead,
Show that love can be a bit pure,
And that we are at least holier then those others,
But if you want only what I cannot give,
Then forgive this heartfelt confession for you were never meant to hear such sweet spoken, soft, honest words that I so mistakenly tried to give you
Oct 2012 · 952
Broken heart </3
Lover of Words Oct 2012
I want to meet you already,
I want your arms around my ribcage, holding me so close at night,
I want to know that you are at least around to make me alright.
I want that face to set me free, and
still allow me to do whatever I please,
I want someone around willing to take care of me,
Is that strange or selfish or just plain stupid?
Or am I just a silly 18 year wondering when her dream will finally come true.
I looked around already and I cannot find you,
Where the hell are you hiding,
Come already find me,
Ignite in within some untamable passion and roaring flames and spark electricity,
I don't care what you look like now, I just want a love to hold on to me, in my darkest hours and dreary days when I feel as if I've been abandoned, or no one really cares and no one ever really did
Just let me know, I'm safe, and sound,
Let me feel like I can express my words and be accepted,
Let me feel loved, and nurtured and touched when need be,
Let me be me,
Be the scars and the brokenness I've mended on my own,
And let me once in awhile bleed openly,
Sometimes my homemade stitches break, and I cannot control the awesome pain that comes over me,
I cry at night continuously,
So all you wonderful boys out there, I'm saving myself for one of you,
I'm longing to be yours for eternity,
I'm hoping that all my patience is not in vain and one of you can come rescue me, whether I need it or not,
I want you to come after me so quickly,
Oct 2012 · 1.3k
Girl Probs
Lover of Words Oct 2012
I am a girl.
See that. A girl.
I'm not a boy.
I got curves and long hair.
Nothing too scary…
Then why the hell won't you talk to me?
If that is what you want, me, then come on boys,
I am waiting. Patiently, wanting to be pursued with every bit of your energy,
I'll give you hints and lead you on, but come on,
It aint that hard to admit you like me,
I mean I may not feel the same,
But seriously,
This is not funny…
You can't call me pretty and then just do nothing,
No, don't walk away yet,
***** into my heart and then not commit,
What is this?
Did your mom's not teach you manners?
Playing your evil games with my lover hazy brain.
Admit it!
***, thats only what you want!
But please, I am not ******…
Neither am I that easy.
Break into my heart, and then rewire my veins,
What? Are you completely insane?
I desire a partnership!
God! Is that so **** deranged?
But no, your heart's too broken, or you just not that interested,
Please…
I will not press my lips upon yours,
The same old story once again
Oct 2012 · 2.9k
Sinister Thoughts
Lover of Words Oct 2012
Caffeine and tobacco, and the occasional puff of marijuana, thats how we do it right.
The lack of love is leaving us lonely and we lie about in vain,
Not sure of what next high is nigh, or if our nights are purely as selfish and ***** as we made them to be,
We didn't know what was next,
We tried to study for a test we knew we were going to fail,
And we had *** maybe three or four times last wednesday,
Except I can't tell when I will ever be able to see him again,
Life is spinning, or is that just me,
I don't know whats up or down, or even where to go next,
I hope that real life isn't as hopeless,
**** it,
I don't care,
This ain't a poem, just a sigh,
I breathed in again some pointless oxygen,
And exhale out the words that make no sense,
An ache of broken dreams and ancient histories,
Of how my life is so **** far from ever being perfect,
I'll always be so fat and dreary,
And  I can never get a guy to truly like me more then just my face,
Please, oh how i wish I could put them in their place,
Quick I need an i.v. to **** out this poison I put inside to hide the sorry facts that I'm alive,
Someone quick give me a drug to block out it all,
The misery I've endured for too many years,
An acid, a cig, a sip of beer,
Anything that will keep me from dying tonight,
Oh but to think of death,
How sweet,
To think of never bearing pain or thought or another heartbeat,
A simple absolute,
A final relief,
Another great day to be destroyed by the fact of another tomorrow,
There would be a nothing to ever be more,
So think not me suicidal,
Just sadistic and a little mad is justice,
But let you not think that I need help,
I need friends thats all,
To help me get through the roughness,
Maybe I'll eventually callous for once,
And the pain I endured will be a remembrance, a faint dream of wonder
Something like a mystery, yet it ends with fondness

— The End —