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 Mar 2014 Lost Cause
Ariel Leann
Self-Harm
Self-Hate
Mis-Used
Mis-Placed

My faith is running thin,
My world is turned upside down,
Always committing a sin,
The demons are forever bound

Self-Harm
Self-Hate
Mis-Used
Mis-Placed

The constant thought of purging,
The teasing of a knife,
The thought is always urging,
To end this helpless life
Self-Harm

Self-Hate
Mis-Used
Mis-Placed

The breaking of a single heart,
The pain whipping through my head,
Just when you think you’ll shatter apart,
The pain begins to numb instead

Self-Harm
Self-Hate
Mis-Used
Mis-Placed

My soul is now hollow,
I can no longer feel pain,
Take another pill to swallow,
In order to stay sane

Self-Harm
Self-Hate
Mis-Used
Mis-Placed

Living for tomorrow,
Yet stuck in the past,
Wallowing in my sorrow,
My life is fading fast

Self-Harm
Self-Hate
Mis-Used
Mis-Placed
 Feb 2014 Lost Cause
Ariel Leann
I just don't understand.

How can you be so blind?
How can you not see,
The answers you need to find,
Are encrusted within the heart of me

I don't understand

How can you not see my crystal clear love,
To hear the words I have been screaming,
But it seems this wish,
Will only be granted when I am dreaming

I don't understand.

I don't want to sob, I don't want to cry
But it feels like I a piece of me is missing,
I feel like I will soon die,
I can no longer take it

I don't understand

These tears I can no longer shed,
My heart can no longer be broken,
So when I lay dead,
Remember these words I have spoken
 Feb 2014 Lost Cause
Ariel Leann
The cuts of a knife,
All down her wrist,
Each scar has a story,
It was fate with a sick twist

Her soul is broken,
Too far from repair,
Each cut a token,
Of the pain that she will bare

She dreams of death,
With its seductive voice,
She can barely catch her breath,
When faced with the choice

She is deep in thought,
The choice is crystal clear,
Death is what she has sought,
It is what she holds dear

There will be no more gray skies,
Nor lousy sunsets,
Not a single lie,
Or a uneasy regret

Everybody has a dream,
Whether they are dead or alive,
This is what she has chosen,
This is how she will survive

She will be on the other side,
Swallowed up in the abyss,
No longer filled with pride,
Or the regret of who she will miss
 Feb 2014 Lost Cause
Ariel Leann
A stab in the chest,
A puncture to the  heart,
I seek internal rest,
Because you tore me apart

This is how I have been living,
This is my pain,
Darling, This is only the beginning,
I am on a high speed train

Not a single tear to shed,
Not a single heart to be broken,
I am better off dead,
This can be your token

You put me through hell,
You had it your way,
I am no longer under your spell,
I no longer have to stay

A stab in the chest,
A puncture of the heart,
I seek internal rest,
Because you tore me apart

A pure inncocent life,
You corrupted with hate,
This is how I will survive,
I guess you can call it fate

I took all the pain I can endeavor,
I put your insults at bay,
My heart is now severed,
I have nothing left to say

Look into my eyes,
Tell me you believe,
Do not speak your lies,
Its time for me to leave

A stab in the chest,
A puncture of the heart,
I seek internal rest,
Because you tore me apart
 Feb 2014 Lost Cause
Ariel Leann
TRAPPED

T
   R
A
     P
P
      E
D
In an illusion of myself
Caught between the past and my own selfishness
Isolated between four walls that are caving in
Hearing the whispers of the unloved
Left alone with just memories to haunt me
No one could hear my cries for help
Nails digging in my back
Slowly puncturing my delicate skin
Feeling my blood seep afloat and slowly stream
Just the right amount of pain
One face left to clench my stomach
Her piercing green eyes in the rage they stayed
Her lips formed into a knarled, derranged twist
Her words cutting like daggers all over my body
Her hair flowing like a monster's
Isolated
I try to scream but it is caught in my throat
Flashing back to the age of six
The monster ontop of me
Enjoying every little cry for help
A man who was suppposed to be a father
Corrupting an innocent child for his own twisted pleasure
He does not know how much he isolated me in my own little world
He laughs at my attempted cries for help
I will *Never
be the same
Corruption
Purging because of my thoughts
The concept was introduced to me
I Never thought I was beautiful
I never really had the chance to be beautiful
Corrupted by uncontrollable words
I don't understand
Looking into the mirror at the monster that I have become
Twisted
Always hid the razor a place where no one would find it
The one thing that I could always rely on
Something that would stay with me
Just wanted someone to love me
Someone to care
Feel the razor slice across my skin
Tears mixing with the blood
Wishing I were never born
Or accomplished my attemped suicide last year
TRAPPED* in the thoughts inside my own head
Isolated in the unheard tears I have been crying
Corrupted by the surrounding people
Twisted in my own thoughts and actions
Sorry, I just needed to let it all out.

— The End —