The bell rings.
I am one of the many cows that herd towards the door,
mooing impatiently to exit.
By entering into the hallway,
I find you easily
because I know where to search,
and we have grown accustomed to
picking each other out in crowds.
Our eyes lock for a fleeting second,
then we both find a spot on the floor to inspect
as we wait for me to
make my way towards your stationary self
and your pocketed hands. Step after clunky step.
Once I arrive, in place of exchanging greetings,
our bodies 180 turn and make our way among fellow cows.
Our lanky walks fall in sync with each other, clumsy
in all the same places.
We walk side by side together. This is routine.
We do this every day. Two among a herd of cows.
Moral of the story:
To everyone else, we are nobody.
To each other, we are somebody.
The favorite part of my day is knowing someone is there
Waiting for me to find my way to them.
The best part is I always do.

I cannot fathom
why that pretty song lasted so much longer
when I was so exhausted
I could hear my bones groan.
Yet that sad poem ended so much quicker
when it was about you.
One sang me to sleep.
One lead me to nightmares.

In times of need,
When I would moan
"I want you" into the phone
I would forget my age.

Or when I stay strong
And restrain my tears
Like a mother at her
Son's funeral does
I forget my age.

In fact,
In times of need,
I am capable of forgetting
Just about everything.

How old am I again?

It's like the unbearable itch of knowing somebody's eyeballs
are piercing the back of your sweaty neck,
and it's intimidating as hell.

It's like the rhythmic pounding of a migraine,
such a pretty and steady beat, but holds
such a negative association with
nauseating pain.
What a shame.

Waiting.

It's not something you can feel,
like the hurting force of hitting the ground hard.

But waiting
for you, someone, something,
anything at all,
it's the most excruciating feeling I have ever felt.

When I am without her the sun doesn’t shine as brightly.
When I am without her the clouds are dark
When I am without her the birds don’t sing as sweetly.
When I am without her the walls close in on me.
whispering her name sustains me.
But when I am with her she lifts me up.
When I am with her I have the strength to move mountains.
When I am with her I can withstand anything.
When I am with her her smile warms my very soul.
When I am with her the angels sing her name.
When I am with her I fall in love all over again.