I am naked
every day.
Visible, fleshy
in every way.

I wear my ***
on my sleeve.
You can possess me
if you please.

Peel my skin off
under the first layer
of peachy crust
lies concrete.

Dig and dig
all you want
your shovel will hit
your arm will break.

My emotions crush me
and swallow me whole.
There is no rationalizing
in the belly of the whale.

I'm no mythic hero
I fear
that I was born
and will die in here.

Just let go
you're ******
give up.

Disintegrating
dissolved
tough luck.

My upper right hand
molar died today. Even
teeth abandon me.

I love you like
a bystander loves
watching a nuclear bomb
explode.

A euphoric flash, I strain
my eyes
and fall back
in part to take it all in,
and in part because
you pushed me.

The mushroom cloud
climbs toward the sky
like a million tiny hands,
one on top of the other,
piling upwards.

I let you
shove energy down my throat,
orange and pink.
Your radiation
penetrates.

Your poison
blanketing the world
in powerful, beautiful,
unforgiving
destruction.

I'm sorry for all the years of
misinterpreted body language.
Please excuse my hopeless
ideology of unrequited love
that I draped over you like
a tattered blanket.

Like a veil, a cloak
so bright and so romantic
I forgot you were underneath it.
I do not have permission
to get to know you.
There is no room in your life
for anyone else. You have
it all. Where did I
go wrong? Sitting alone in the
one bedroom apartment of my mind.
Staring at strangers.
Gawking at ghosts. Creating an
entire lifetime narrative
for someone who I'll
never know.

I will repress your rejection
I'll erase it from my work
of fiction.
Your picture will hang
on my lonely white wall
next to the other princes and
kings, all chivalrous, all beautiful
illusions who loved me.

If you don't like me
then why do you stare?
Are my eyes so captivating
that you need to catch them
every time?

Why is it impossible for you
to avoid me? Is my hair as dark and flowing
as your favorite Disney princess?

You are obsessed
with my attention.
I see the thirst, I speak
your body's language.

You flaunt illusion in
the way you walk
begging me to look up.

Each step is intentionally
slow as syrup. Why are you so
keen on my
wanting you?

I consider and meditate
and reconsider and finally
my moral fiber is weak,
I glance.

The moment-- I know
you feel it too.
The hot stuff in the air.
It makes your short blonde hairs
stand up.

Every time, you have always
been staring first. And once caught,
your eyes don't move
the air between
its a lockout.
You never smile.

I always assumed I was the one
stalking you, but lately
I don't know who is
following who.

In the middle of a heavy
terrible storm
my mind wanders to the sun.

Beads of water drip
off my eyelash as I close it
and feel the warmth
of a hot august day.

The thunder is doing
what thunder does best
grows louder
gets closer, I would
give anything for
a red hot sunburn
that stings to the third degree.

The lightning drenched
natures rave
reflecting off
puddles only
makes me crave
the hardened
thirsty light
that dehydrated pavement absorbs
like a victim to
the days rays.

Finally- a break
in the clouds.
Silence.
Heat.
The sunlight is better
than my wildest dreams.
Glowing lines protrude
from all angles like
a crude childrens drawing.

My expectations
far succeeded.

The sun screams
my name.

And suddenly
I miss the rain.