those unspoken words
that show in the eyes

coffee grounds
with a dash of
grapefruit
flowing
thro my veins

been a bit
frozen
speechless
paralysed
couldn't see myself
in my own eyes
where did i go

i
dont
want
to
go
now

and as for teaching others
you can only tell them truths
as they occur

skin
a sheen of sweat
cries ring out
sheets
all tangled agony
***** foetid air
contract
cryout
subside
a birthing
no pink and downy babe is this
a mucus clot
a jellied mass
a river of blood and tears
a termination
of what wasn't quite
a tractor passes feeding out
calves for the slaughter
the sun shines
birds sing
all oblivious of anything
a death and life goes on

Yehudi menuin
playing loud in the background
your leaving home
my darling
20 and 12
all at once
he had you
I've had him
we roll on

living and dying
what a strange combination
of commonplace
and extraordinary

i can feel love
for a handful
of men
is it love?
or something
dilute
to feel this way
about 4
or 5

we do not "date"
or even kiss (oh but our eyes....)
we  
talk
laugh
sing
joke
together

i can feel love
for a handful of men
is it love
or something dilute

why do i ask

I called her Amber
because she's a jewel
she glows with warmth
like a fire fueled
an ancient soul
trapped in her eyes
just like in amber
are fireflies

or a cut version

I call her Amber
cos she's a jewel
aglow with warmth
like fire fueled
ancient soul
within her eyes
just as in amber
trapped fireflies