My mind is a garden;
Overgrown,
Blooming far to much for my own good.
Every August a flower appears to shower me with water,
Touch a petal to my cheek,
And wilt away
As each
"I love you"
Turns frail in my fingertips.
A red rose grew
Ridden with thorns;
I couldn't hold on long
Without bleeding.
Garden filled with weeds
petals blocking sun,
Impossible to breathe.
Red as fire,
Borne of blood
Dew turned to rain
Until I couldn't tell tears
From flood.
I loved you still.
Winter came and nipped your neck
But you grew
Into someone else's garden.
And on valentines day,
You made her eyes like daisies.

You're the light
In a sea of reeds.
Salt clinging to hair
Bubbles kissing eyelids.
You're the grains in my toes,
Crashing euphoria.
A wave
Returning when the moon calls the tides.
You're a feather
Without a reason to fly
Or bird to pay homage.
Skin of a seal
Sliding peacefully;
secrets of past storms
leaving bellies weathered.
You're the mender of flesh
Torn on tiny pebbles.
Each budding heart
Back to the sea,
To mend in the only arms
Guaranteed to remember my name.

May the branches of your cherry tree
Blossom fruitful and ripen beneath a kind,
Soft sun.
May the sky remind you it's okay to cry
Even if there is gold upon the loom
And green in the field.
May your mind be full of skepticism
Never criticism.
May you remain pure and strive to
Avoid ignorance.
Bliss is achieved upon crossing troubled water
Aim to avoid the security of a bridge.
Ignore cold shoulders:
Bathe in the sun.
Remember wind pulls petals from the strongest flowers.
Weeping willows sway in the wind like waves.
May it swallow your spine
Permeate vertebrae
And pull you deeper into blue until lungs beg to brake.
Emma,
I will sleep beside you until the rain comes.

Headphones and fried food,
metabolisms and ****** moods.
Broken condoms; beer pong,
scraped up knees, rip the ****.
Scratched wrists;
That kiss was more than just a kiss.
Mirrors, scales,
headaches, high heels.
Anti-depressants, cold sores,
***** toe nails, clogged pores.
Bare feet, torn shirts,
sweat covered forehead, short skirts.
Lace bra on the floor,
don't forget to lock the door
Pimples and Prozac;
******* and match making.
You can always tell when she's faking.
Pierced ears, cheap beers,
blow jobs and rich snobs.
To your last family party and first cigarette;
Raspberry tinted ***** and the first name you try to forget.
Stained underwear, tweezers and straightened hair.
Mascara and flat irons,
But in all honesty
What the **** is a flat iron?
To rice cakes and heartaches
Lice and love and public bathrooms.
Undercover cops,
Plan B and mushrooms.
A bruise so sore,
what's there to live for?
Can't have my love, can't have my *****,

what happened to the right to choose?

It's becoming harder then ever
to keep track
because
not even deja vu
will bring you back.

Who broke the rules,
Who broke your heart?
Why was the counter so sticky?
Even more beautiful in the rain
Or in the madness between your lungs.
Who broke the rules,
Who said it first?
Does it count if I lied through my teeth.
One rose for us all
But someone got there first and stole them all.
American as it seems it's still unfair.
Thank you for teaching me the sorrow in solidarity.
If the palm of your hand could cleanse each sin
blood would cover my body.

Freckles speculate hate
Mixing rushing ***
Kissing touching
Numb
Span the globe
Scan my mind
Just in time
To find a dime
Perfect flawless
Lawless bunch
Cockroach
Toenails
Make a crunch
All that rises is smoke and dust
And fragments of metal
Rocking chair rust
Because Melbourne is sinking
Along with my mind
Touch me forever
I swear I'll be kind
Even parking lots
Run out of time
Between brown eyes
And pursed lips
Your silver lining covered by rain
Refrain
Dear you look so splendid
And stupid
In the skin that drips
And slips
Into a bucket of paint
And freckles faint
Now fly away
To play on children's cheeks
On tire swings
While a demented boat flings
Sea lions upon one another
Into the bed of tears
She hears him cry
Because his truck has one wheel
And he can't quite feel
His head on her bed
Or his marshmallow finger tips
Cracking whips
While her hips collapse
And gasp
And sigh
While nuns are get high
Off of Jesus
The gardener from around the bend
And they bend
And kneel
On their knees
To please
The swarm of honey bees
That sail with the wild things upon the seas
But they can only count to ten
And not a sound from Big Ben
With a look in his eye
Of boredom and a final slice
Of pecan pie
Because he has been drafted again
No time to pretend
Tell your love its the end
Grab your gun
And run
Into the blood bank
Battlefield
Lay awake to forget
A stomach full of whiskey and regret
From the book of folklore below the bed
Floating bubbles on the dead
Lake ahead
Resist
Persist
Blue hair slams upon a grave
Red lips gravely graze
Claire's feet by the bay
What a feat
To defeat
Nothingness
The mending of pretending
But the truth is aloof
And that boy is still homeless
While Benjamin Franklin plays hide and seek
Waiting
Hesitating
Because he may smoke cigarettes or he may have a wife
But it's better safe then *****
And a large crowd
Never seemed so proud
Of a mayor of a city
Just west of someplace east
You can count on Chinatown to understand
Anything about rice or business underground
Because the pigment of your person
Is somehow more important
Then the character behind the content
And place of origin
Because the children are crying
Can't you hear it
Mothers punch and hit
While families full of love are unfit
Because there are  two fathers
And someone decided two is worse then none
And the green on the ground is wasting away
While  green in the bowl can't stay
All the color all sails away
With the boys off to war
Sent astray
In the middle of the day
Close your eyes open your mind
You may meet your soulmate
You may lose your mind
Either way you're running out of time.

Sail back down the moon
left by the door of dust caked feet
you claim to be your own.
Paint back the days spent flipping scales,
replace the compass drenched in blood
in the center of my living room.
The king and pawn don't look so different
if you squint you eyes.
Tell me again, slower this time
how we coexist as moths and light.
Peculiar you'd say, how unequal it seems.
Seventeen years and not a sense
of the universe within each drop
on flesh as thin as the umbrella above your head.
Everyone's a soldier
marching on the shoulder
of every other soldier.
Carry me back on the back that didn't break
when night swallowed its stomach.
I may be a moth by your side
but the light didn't leave
when it had the chance.

From the corner of the eye of the sea
Orchids spread like plasma
Further into the ground of soil.
Each compliment drew her limbs closer
To the dirt crusted creature.
The bird brought tales of streif
From the east wing of the sun.
She slipped like liquid into these words
And fell heavy toward the belly of belief.  
Sitting upon a rock by the sky,
She stroked his broken neck
From nightfall
Straight into autumn.
She sealed her eyes tight
And gave the bird each ounce of love
Her fingertips could muster.
With each day her skin grew harder
And tiny bones formed beneath fragile flesh.
Weeks turned tragic songs to lullabies.
On the sidewalk of the desert
High in clouds of steam,
Her eye lids fluttered and parted.
She looked upon the furrowed bird in disbelief.
The saddened sight had been replaced
By a lovely little boy.
Her mind, as heavy as her hands.
Tears welled within her eyes
But not one fell
Because her cheekbones had sprouted feathers
And years of stroking and sympathy
Made her weak.
She had become the lowly bird,
And as she glimpsed into his eyes, now blue
He chuckled cruelly at her fragility.
Sympathy burned as rage beneath her ribs.
Lightning struck the sky and she learned
Never to trust a bird
Again.

i don't think it's fair
to hide away
by the way
it was the driest parts of you
that made the spell of aging
fade
like freckles in the winter
bloomed only to evade
like wax heavy and damp
take another pill
to ease those cramps
or maybe just light your own candle next time
because i guess we're both a little damaged
or have seen too many moons
either way
there will always be unmarked tombs
and cigarettes to cloud the air
and graze fingers as a reminder
you're only seventeen
too young not to care
you grew with such ease
orange trees
sprawling roots remain to prove
gods talk as loud as monsters do
but heaven will always have gates
to keep out lovers naive to fate
and pyramids tell the geometrical truth
Wes
the blood on the floor
would be better hidden beneath a bruise
because theres no time like the present
is time a present
or a curse
is the water clearer or worse
on your side of the bridge
and how long will it take to cross?
i don't want wet feet for christmas
forever is a greedy business
when sincerity lacks
scars sliver like snakes
my lips beg this cycle to break
pull sleeves down
to avoid demons that drop
from sky to ground
to dust beneath the Tennessee sun
just in time for draught thats begun
breaking southern girls who are fragile
enough to turn from glass to stone
so stop complaining and open your eyes
its april again
even the birds stopped crying
your tears will turn to mud
scrape them from you
knifes aren't only good for killing
and when i opened my mouth to scream
you silenced my cries
my words never said as much as my eyes
opened wide as i utter in sorrow
if you died today
i'd die tomorrow.

Stained tea kettle howled
almost as loud as we did
one cool November night
leaving us trapped between
boredom and curiosity.
Stale bread and ripped jeans
turning us into something more
then five strangers with too much time
and too little money in our hands.
It didn't matter how many scars covered our wrists
because for a moment they didn't exist
through our bloodshot eyes.
Clarity and time became dim
as lights faded along with my mind
because soon I would find
my hands inside yours without a word
and slowly things seemed to fall apart
as months of wary burdened our hearts
because we couldn't quite forget the night
we turned from strangers to lovers
the questions never answered seemed to linger
that led us to crumble
as quickly as the brownie between my fingers.

People are so scared to be forgotten that they engrave there name on benches beside the words "in memory of" as if in some way they may live on through metal plastic and wood. In a room full of strangers is anyone themselves? Maybe just everyone. Yourself is unattainable when surrounded by others. A tree is pure and strong until it is climbed and chopped. Many would rather the abuse instead of solitude. To be alone is not lonely, it is full. To be full is lonely unless it is shared. To share a mere sliver leaves two hungry stomachs. Instead, remain in solitude until bliss and self reliance is achieved. Once you can be alone with no guilt or burden, then you are ready to open your veins to the blood of another.

The sky is about to make you a liar
because
to the moon and back
is utterly impossible.
I still believe you
even if the universe never did.

And danger was closer and closer with each passing moon
but anyway
we turned to stargazing.
But even the stars fall from the sky
and no dream of mine could make you love me;
Or you for that matter
but I do
I love you.

You look good in blue,
it imitates my eyes
which mirrors my heart
that is yours
forevermore.

I weaved something beautiful for us both
but life is not a loom.
Its a series of complex embroideries
and our patterns never
matched.

At least you're honest,
that's something I've never been much good at.

i closed                            my heart                            to lose myself
all the doors                   shut out                             the person
but forgot                       the sound                           i found
to keep                           your mind                          i cracked the lock
the key                           you shared with me         and set us free

The blood on your wrist
should be coating veins.
The salt on your cheeks
should dry by morning.
I should feel your heart,
not just your finger tips.
You said it was only fair
to save it for me,
the only girl you ever loved.
I gave it to him instead,
in the backseat on a sidesteeet,
only to be carried farther from the only arms to ever hold me
like they ment it.
I'm sorry I couldn't feel your hands on my eye lids,
begging me to see the love I had
before I found it in the palm of someone else's hands.
My lips are like sunflowers,
but even more fragile.
Every may I am plucked from the garden
and held tightly
for a moment in a field,
until morning dew swallows me whole.
As for love,
my father never taught me how,
and the words he placed at the tip of my tongue never fit in the space between your fingertips.
Keep them for someone else's lips.
Someone who isn't made if sunflowers
that will wilt in your hands.

Arizona sunrise a leaf below his feet,
February tug of war led the rope to feather.
Stuck between pyramids and a desert flat
above sewers of east Brooklyn,
bridges emptied dust to flame.
He covered rice paper with delicate yellow birds,
and tore his clothes to shreds.
Swapped sleep for a girl in faded overalls,
but no flowers from his garden
high amongst the clouds
could match her feathered beauty
so he bought a peppered owl.
The great salt lake shriveled her skin,
the birds heavy flesh hit the ground,
leaving a mark deeper
then the **** on her shoulder.
Still, she stuck to him like syrup
but sweet faded to sun.
Trapped inside a number maze
with dyslexia in reverse,
only shivers of winter to remind
he is as alive as the moons cheekbone
hanging
haunting the sky.
He cried twice that year.
Once when the bees carried feet from honey,
and again when he lost his eyes to the sea.
He wrote love letters to the albino fifth graders older sister
and never once
thought twice.
The sky, a compass
swinging
swaying,
a weeping willow in his veins sobbed until every ounce of blood was salt.
Sinking as fast as his heart
last February
to the crust of the sea.
Perfect shape took form,
he never wondered why.
Open eyes uncovered
folded faded overalls beside a door unopened.
Smile like silk
pulled him into her lips,
swallowed him whole.
Forever he will wade
and wait
in the beehive of her belly.

Your silver lining,
                    fading
                    to grey.

Fingers like bones morph to my chin,
Tilt it always back toward the land,
Whenever I float to the sea.
I envy the sky for it hears the sound of your laugh.
I imagine it like the stars;
Bright and unique,
Probably shining.
Please dance through my eardrums;
Sing songs of protection and loyalty.
I wonder if you were a lovely liar,
Or maybe even a poet.
I hope you'd be proud;
I ran from the smoke,
coughed the cloud from my lungs.
It lingered above until it ran out of rain,
Like tears on the crescent moon of my cheeks.
The blood we share flows faster then his temper,
And hotter then her lips,
But I swear to God I feel you somewhere,
Disguised as my rib cage,
You hold me up,
Keep me centered.
For me and you I swear,
Ill chase the stars till sunrise,
And light candles in corners forgotten.
Your room is yellow,
Flowers bloom in the floor boards,
Signs of you all around.
I lay my head where you once placed yours and think;
Did you even like yellow?
The palm of my hand is a map to your core.
Ill shrink to a vein within myself and slide straight to you.
The problem is picking which path of three will land me back to a face like my own.
Hold the matches,
Kiss every tomb,
Saturate my eye lids,
show my blood to me.

Here's to pianos.
To uncut toe nails and broken jaws.  
Here's to sweaty palms and fancy door knobs.
The last tissue in the box and third graders who know every single dinosaur.
Here's to prickly legs and furless cats.
Slamming doors and rubbing alcohol.
Fun house mirrors and wet towels.
Here's to the boy with the sweaty armpits,
And the biggest heart in the room.
Here's to all the girls who will never give him a chance
Because his hair is greasy
And he always has pieces of apple stuck in his braces.  
Here's to grandmothers holding their children's babies for the first
And last time.
Here's to six foot tall nine year olds
And acne covered foreheads.
North Ohio and beehives.
Here's to wrinkles and back pain,
And the kids who never change for gym class.
Here's to burnt papers and wrongful convictions.
Faked I love you's and backwards t shirts.
For every broken leg and broken heart,
Seasonal depression and ADD.
For unshaven armpits and ripped jeans.
Frequent showers and twisted ankles.
****** mattresses and forged signatures.
Here's to the things that remind me of you.

A swarm of horses sailed toward the sky
half in reverse of the ocean,
a heart that questioned the reflection of seaside.
Back in the south she melted bicycle gears to liquor
Quenching a million budding buoys becoming boys.
Inside her smile, a compartment of spit
beside the blinds sealed off to the color red.
In a room full of eardrums
a name like a knife,
rooting and sewing the ground of your yearning.
The moon shook you
As fast as headache turns to dust.
It hits harder then your hands,
softer then tears of antelope sliding down sails;
A reminder how you looked 
when you first caught my eye
Plastered on the tree of a chandelier
Hanging as high as suicide pastries
Under emerald flavored corneas.

A tulip is just a tulip
in her palm or mine.

It didn't make sense to a sky
that only cried in April.

Same moon,
different set if eyes.

Just promise me,
you're one of us.

My pillow
still smells
*like you

Everything is bittersweet
Because evil taints all good
And I'm sorry I always say what I feel
Even if it doesn't sound how it should.
But if I love you I'll let you know
Even if words turn to bullets mid air
Because every day has potential to evade
And be the first or the final
So we can start fresh
Or sunbathe til scars fade
And our thighs recover from tongues like razor blades
That perch as serpents in a basket eager to attack
With each flick of a lighter.
It's okay to be misunderstood
Because of how or why
And words are meant to be said not thought
So I turned that filter off miles down that highway.
Now I'm running on empty with a head clear as day
In the backseat of your car
When the blunt between my fingers turns into my mothers lips reminding me to be myself.
It's harder then it seems when yourself is caught between
the intersection of angel and sinner
And the common ground gets thinner
when the right brain hates the left
And the blue eyes burn red.
It's hard to understand I suppose
but in her eyes that clung to my own
I found the world inside and every step along the path I carry twice the flesh
And maybe for once you can understand why I say every word
And don't seem to bother what the neighbors overheard
as they biker over who needs to cut the lawn
And who lost twenty pounds.
We are all seven million people within one set of bones
and thousands of missed appointments guided me straight to you
and now I'm not the same
because you placed a flag upon my heart and claimed your stake
that seemed to change the game.
Olivia's eyes are closed permanently
Because believe it or not things can be permanent
My father whispered to my spine
As the harmonica struck a chord and cleared the room of itchy suits and small talk that will fade like a sunburn
which is the only proof that the sun did shine
A while back down the road beside
The phase you left behind
along with your virginity in someone's basement
on a mattress with someone named Chris... No, David.
Either way it's all the same on a street without a name one Thursday night last August.
Don't tell a soul because even souls lie sometimes
and soles never last the entire track season
So hold your breath and cross the hot rocks
Everything will callouss at some point
And until that day she will sit in the back of the class because
numbers just don't translate and she cant seem to stop tapping her leg
And when smoke claims it's stake and life's on the brink
She collapsed into my arms
scared eyes looked to mine in some kind of desperation;
helpless to death I hold her close and swore to God I loved her.

And in the flash of death in life I know I knew I meant it.

feet on the desk,
pen on the paper,
deep in thought?
sincerity tapers.
quick to falter,
ignore deceit,
back between foreign sheets.

wondering;
was it wine or blood that filled her head,
when burgundy stained the paper red?
image fading,
done persuading,
*did you kiss the wrong boy again?

It's 7:41 on a Thursday,
she's away at school,
her feet aren't in the country,
she would say I warned you
and he would change the subject.
He can't be bothered,
and he who would move mountains
can't know how high they perch.
He's too high to notice,
and I gave her up to impatience months ago,
trading beer for cigarettes,
even though smoking kills.
He would cry victim,
and be right all along,
while she would smirk silently
and whisper
what goes around comes around.

It's 7:46 on a Thursday,
and your lips are far from mine
but in my mind,
still.
Still there, filled with words like
now
and
trust me, it'll start to feel good soon.

Still there, singing Iron and Wine
with too much soul and not enough rasp.

Still there, chapped and peeling,
blowing smoke in my eyes so I can't quite see.

Still there, asking for another hit,
and apologizing because you hit too hard,
but hit the **** again
because we both know what you really mean
when tension is fire and your fists are the savior
So go for it,
hit again
maybe this time I'll bleed enough for you to notice.

Notice,
notice.

The mix tape I left you has love written all over it,
literally.
Is the birthday card still on your dresser?
Ironic.
My dresser,
your dresser,
your fist,
my nails.
We all seem to have something in common here,
maybe none of us know how
or when
to stop.

Stop.
hit,
ignore,
light up,
fall down,
get high again,
bend over,
trapped under...
this time the answer is

**no.

Sitting by the window of an unfriendly room,
baffled voices surround an unquenchable core.
Digging my nails into flesh on my wrist,
I crack both big toes.
All the while, your limbs travel my inner eye lids.
Something simple as a blade of grass,
complex as The Birth of Venus cracking the surface of the sea.
Strings lace the cortex of my mind,
until all that remains are two puppets;
metal spokes force your eyes
to exonerate mine.

97 days
12 grams
4 cigarettes
18 coffees,
and I still can't recall
the color of your spine.

As fast as ocean sweeps the bay
legs of crescent carry away
a sea of wonder won't reject
the sweetest moons you collect
in the palm of your hand soft as peach
slender spine strains to reach
the sun in the sky too far for advice
on speaking to creatures fragile as ice
because the sweetest girl, dear Josephine
shielded by blue instead of green
has a smile painted upon the wall
off the museum fortress she dare not fall
because the places you venture will seem
only to exist before in your dreams
never so lonesome as an unshared bed
cluttered with thoughts of remorse instead
slamming doors in the old broken home
cover the windows high with stones
when travels far and wide resume
remember your home is always the moon.

Winters back to remind me I loved you
In every patch of ice
Summers back to swap the tide
Of my eyes
And change reflection to deception in the sea that turned our bodies to trees
Floating as simply as regret on the tip of a tongue too timid to change its mind
I don't mind, I swear.
Tell me again how the flowers bloomed before August
And have since withered to stone
But eighty seven rib cages cant form a single heart
Each piece of glass slammed on your skull remains in my top drawer
Just in case I decide to piece you back together
And form from red a sky of grey
The birch on the tree left stomachs in knots so
Why not
change the song on the radio again,
Just in case the next one doesn't remind me of you
But it seems to haunt shoulders stroking my neck as softly as birds released from the cage of my shoulder blades
You live in cartoon houses
Beside plastic covered floors
And shield leaves with newspaper
Just to fill the space
between me and you.
There is a blood stain on my floor I can't seem to scrape
And your shirt is in my closet
Beside the window shattered to grain as small as bone
Somewhere between a metal and a base I found your fingertips tapping my leg
But you took it with you when you left
And now I can't walk to the window and watch you cry every Tuesday.
The rope burns you splintered
On the corners of my eyes reminded
I should have known you didn't mean it
When grass formed in the cracks of your lips because
All things go
Except the smell of sweat on my bed,
tears like dew on the petals of my cheeks
And the sea I gave my soul to.
Salt remains to evporate eventually
Along with thoughts of you so
I stayed up debating if the sky was simply a piece of black paper freckled silver
And if you ever felt the grass between your toes
But all things fade with sunrise.

We were like the sun,
A nebula of broken words that led straight to warmth.
Your hands were mine to hold,
And rub.
They look
Colder and shadowed purple
From halfway across the room.  
Your eyes, a swarm of bees,
But your taste buds are no longer satisfied with honey;
They crave something greener.
We smiled at each others flaws,
And skipped stones to maybe one day glide across the water,
without being scraped by salt.
Your forearms healed each wound inflicted by burns.
Hours spend straightening your shoulders
To walk among a rare breed,
As connected to the fire as you.
Close to the brim,
Bursting with love,
You must have looked back and fallen in,
To the smoke your lungs couldn't deny.
But don't deny me,
the right to love you still.

Before I could connect the dots
They became like stars
And sat on your cheeks
Painting the universe with scars.
Taking me to a place
Where rain drops elate
And sun dries the fields
Where the great trees yield
Seeds of yesterday's blessings.
Do you know knuckles tighten
Tears swell and bloom,
And vessels seem to cringe
When your name,
Like a knife
Is thrown across the room.
I hate the sour taste of resent on my tongue,
And the emptiness of words
Like the songs never sung.
You, like a cloud, hang too low
Like last night when they pried
So I swallowed the tears to let it go,
Heavy with regret.
Each one of my bones has your initials etched
And probably my forehead too
Because everyone seems to draw a line between me and you
Thicker then it ever grew on your side of the fence.
The truth behind us is as simple as flames,
One always burns faster, and nothing's to blame
But it's 5 pm and my hands have moved on
To someone else's back
And you may hold her hair back for a moment on your bed
But she will never understand the
Mountains in your mind
Or try to climb to sunrise and understand the lies
Like I did one Sunday morning.
I hope she never loves you
Because you deserve nothing more then the sting of the sea you refuse to walk along with me.

A fawn pounds
dewy ground
fleeting feet
defeat deamons
made of concrete
and plaster
running faster
escaping gaping
holes in ozone
cell phone rings
birds singing
silence swallows
kin from within
the womb and crust
inside the skin
of earth below
moving slow
tectonic plates
sway
the arms of the moon
cocoon fragile fibers
from trees and leaves
but the sun set again
like last Tuesday
and the winter before
marked with blood
on the door
moving on
shaking sun
the sea will always
reach the shore
and move on

Wake up already.
I've been staring at the scratch on your neck since half past three.
You look strangely similar
To the sidewalk I've walked a million times before
But you're not cracked
Or rotted like my eye sockets.
If everybody knew why windshield wipers
Hide what keeps us writing love letters to boys we'll never meet,
Even weeds would look good in a garden.
The cold rusted my knee caps
And staining the carpet red
But it was worth it to hold your hand,
for a minute and 37 seconds.
There's a vase of flowers by the door
From a lover who didn't make the cut.
A cut on your shoulder
Leaves the fire burning blue.
Paper clips lined the ceiling
Of the California oak
By the edge of his bed.
Do it for yourself,
I swear to the moon I'll be grateful
No matter how long the line to heaven
Wraps around my wrists.
Under the sand trapped in your toes
I learned to choke on something other then the water
Bubbling my lungs to cobalt.
I'll flick every switch and touch you forever
If you teach me to love you back.
And if the desert could yell
As loud as my eyes
*You'd feel it too.

In the palm of your hand an augur collects dew,
Closer to molten rock then lava,
Like skin on glue.
Jeremiad tongues connect with one kiss
Of the first lover of his kind
Never to be missed.
Amongst skipping stones and a de facto home,
Books stack high between beds made of bone.
Excavating a rib cage only to find a heart, hard
Stripping each symbol of protection
On a door fire charred.
Your eyes choked love
Words tore veins slow
Burning the worst fire I'll ever know.

You are only as beautiful
As the scent of your soul;
And gasoline can't seem to light any fire
But your own.
Wrapped up in twine tighter then your grip,
Pull the string, I'll spin fast enough to forget your face
Again.
One, two, three spokes and sticks
To scrape the cornea of a third eye,
Barely wide enough to see freckles on your face.
Painting sidewalks red with chalk
To hide blood from Christmas morning,
Ignoring every warning;
Do you think leaves brown and fall to die without a meaning?
Palms up, veins sprawled,
Come inside and prove yourself to the rusted copper sign on my spine,
Warning of a fine line.
Splatter spatter dots and scrapes
On the white wall beneath a triangle window,
Crossing a bridge you swore you'd ignore
Back to the soles of my shoes.
Red white and black or blue,
What's it matter when my bones and blood are no longer bruised.
And it doesn't make sense why we don't hold hands,
And why we can't help singing the words to our least favorite songs.
Today I heard you breathe,
Saw you bleed and slam a fist on the table,
Because for every flower that wilts and dies,
A secret garden dances ballet toward torn petals,
Blooming blue from red.

The moon is full,
I know you love that
along with the way your toes feel in the ocean
as the waves pull you toward the sea.
You say that's where you belong
but the salt can never quite permeate enough
for you to evaporate
so instead,
you wade.
If I could wish for the world
all I would ask
is that the craters of the moon share with you
a home in the sky
and the ocean swallow you whole
and carry your soul
from roaring tides.

She's eloquent
and wonderful
and  always manages to be just as beautiful at the crack of dawn.

Olivia,
each day
I pray
yellow flowers
flood heaven
and dance
beside you
in the light of day,
and rub  your back
through nightfall.

I didn't come here to cry,
but you're in every crack on this street
making it harder then before.
We invented the winter
to fill my mouth with clouds
and watch trees sprout from bare branches.
I have a book full of poems,
34 about you;
empty words of a cluttered mind.
Everything worth saying
is trapped on the corners of your lips
below the sun of east Portugal
by the bay that burned your feet.
I watched a moth land on your eye lid;
you hardly even flinched.
The sewing machine in the sky
that held us close can't click forever,
neither can the clock on the mantle
and I fear we are running out of time to say
I'm sorry
and take back each rock we threw
before we forget each others faces.
Remember
the things we smoked,
and the love we made one Tuesday.
The feelings we shared as coldly
as the hands we never grasped.
You slid my bones from cellophane skin,
and threw them back to the shore,
just please give me back to Ohio
when October knocks on the brick between my veins.
Remember my eyes?
You took them on your back when you left,
and haven't seen them since.
I want to press  my cheek against your chest,
feel you breathing like so many times before.
If I could have one wish
I would run as far as it took to look into your eyes
just one last time,
and hope to god you notice.

And it all comes down to
who goes down on who
because a necklace of bruises
is worth more then diamonds
and words fade faster
then a back full of scratches.
Hands are for more then holding
and sheets serve another purpose;
messy hair tells a far more captivating story.
Because legs are intended to shutter
and sighs that expel uncover
far more secrets then your lips dare utter.

Your car was perfectly warm
with a chill that wouldn't fail.
My hands strong enough to know
not to hold yours frail.
And that bottle of wine haunted us both,
longing for a sip.
Me, like that bottle,
unsafe in your grip.
But anyway,
I drank.
Partially to remind myself of what we'd had before,
but it tasted different,
sipping it became more of a chore.
And you were nervous to be beside me,
I could feel it getting worse,
when you brushed my leg and said sorry
with an uncomfortable amount of force.
It's okay
I remind you
it's just me.
Quick to fill the silence I reached for a CD,
but no track seems to fit the mood.
All of our favorites sounded wrong,
too much tension in every song.
Fumbling through the tracks,
I ignored the breeze
to fill the unending silence,
of friends turned lovers turned enemies.
And before I could muster a new conversation,
a tear hit my lap,
because between me and my best friend,
not even music could fill the hallow gap.

She carves names of people she won't meet
On bark she can't reach
On trees her hallucinations nourish
In grass too brown to flourish.

The holes in the ozone layer have cracked
and all the fog is rising
and diffusing into heaven
where the angels choke
and lay dying
beneath the sky stained black.
Light up the dark with the flick of a switch,
the power will simmer as circuits brake
because now the sky is dimmer
then ever before.
The glow at the end of the tunnel is weak
and the angels no longer sing
because their lungs are heavy with the sting
of the smog that fills heaven
too much for fragile eyes to handle.
Tears dissipate and trickle to earth
but these drops are not enough to reverse
the draught and dull of the human curse.

Unsteady pedestal,
wall of thin glass
as fragile as skin fluorescent.
An exhibit to contemplate;
ponder and pick apart.
Take an ax,
spare my flesh.
Break in on a starless night
and liberate me
from haunting glares,
intoxicating gasps
as if you've never seen a lost girl before.
"Look at her arms scared black and blue"
"And beneath those bandages is a heart never fully healed."
The whispers accumulate as they remove magnifying glasses from their pockets
and gaze upon streaks and stains
that never fully washed off.
What is it that they love to tear apart and analyze?
Maybe it's the lies.
Squint your eyes and read between every line;
you'll still never understand,
too many pages have been torn out;
eradicated.
Scribbles cover missing words like
I love you
I miss you
I hate you
these windows serve their purpose,
of creating a show from a fragile spectacle
about the girl who never seemed to feel enough
or at the wrong times, felt too much.
But even the strongest glass can crack,
and a pedestal won't hold her weight forever.

I can't say I said to stop
but I never asked for this to start.
It was a Monday,
A cold one when you first held my hand.
Well not my hand, my hips actually,
but it may as well be the same thing at this point.
I told you not to fall and I swear to god I meant it,
But anyway,
seasons change and nothing stops the wind from blowing.
It was the comfortable type of pain, you said,
the kind where you forget what it was like to breathe normal.
Somewhere along the way by the rocks or maybe even in a field,
I remembered why I loved you
And cried to each and every blade of grass because they'd never understand.
I pulled out clumps and chunks until all that was left was dirt,
And when I realized what was gone I sat blisterung in the sun,
threading each and every blade back into place.
The difference was,
no one was waiting on my side with a needle to repair the damage,
Because I crossed the bridge to you.
You didn't play the part
You let the part play you and ego swallowed you whole.
You were free to go at any time,
I never made you stay
And the word I love you sounded tainted coming from hands that pressed my body to the ground.
Nothing bites as hard as reality
Except you, according to my neck at least.
I'm sorry we ever became lovers because since October the girl has changed but the moon has stayed the same.
And can I tell you something...
You never even ment a thing.

I couldn't stand thinking about you;
I started drinking about you.
Wine ran thin,
morphed to blood.
You called me psychotic,
I've just seen too much of you to be sane.
Like bruised ribs
and eyes black as the pit in your chest.
Where is your heart?
Washed away in the rain,
dripping through cracks
so girls below can catch a glimpse of hell.
Enough is enough.
The words inside melodies never say anything new,
but I listen on repeat just in case
I catch a glimpse of anything true.
Or things I lost when the flood broke my bones,
Making an enemy ship of our sullen home.

You can't break a heart that isn't healed from the last set of eyes.
A reminder from the moon to the stars
It's never too late for something beautiful
To fall from the sky
Into the palm of your hands.
There is a place across a river
Where the East meets what's west,
And all the children wait with bandages for cut wrists to heal in the sun before it sets.
I have a fear of setting in stone
Because you can only stare at the sun for so long
Before beauty and light causes tears.
Nothing beautiful,
Like an angel in the snow
Remains forever,
And I'm stuck in time
Because there's something going around the room
That I've avoided well so far
But a bird can't fly forever and neither can my heart
I have to fall at some point
Into someone one else's sun.

Guzzling water to cure the dry mouth,
I hold my tongue to remind myself not to admit
I love you as a terrorist loves a gun,
But you're even more lethal.
And I can't seem to remember who told me the truth
Because the room was too dark to decipher the words
Like I love you.
Did you mean what you said
Last November
About next February
And still being together?
Blood is thicker then wine but every thanksgiving
I drink instead
Just in case you show up
Like you did beneath the last full moon.
I really can't say I understand you
And I know I never will
But I don't know why I always seem to fall
For the most complicated,
With minds as twisted
As mine is fragile
But for a minute there on the docks
The moon caught your sillhoette
And I swear to God I saw a tear
Trickle slowly from you cheek.
Your hands were cold
Pressed against my heart
But no amount of love can warm them
Or make blood flow where there is drought.