A month ago.
31 days .
744 hours.
44,640 minutes.
2,678,400 seconds.
From this very moment.
I ran up to the man of my dreams,
And was held tightly in his embrace.
His smile light up his face,
Like the sun lights up the afternoon skies.
His eyes gleamed with happiness.
Like the stars when they fill the up the dark night.
Caught up in his presence alone.
I remembered once again what it felt like.
What it felt like to be whole again,
Not worrying about the tomorrows to come.
Or the yesterdays once held.
Now holding more then my hand.
He carries my entire being.
Treated with delicacy,
Shielded from the damage that falls all around me.
Taught once again what it feels like,
What it feels like to love.
A month ago.
I ran up to the man of my dreams.

The words you want to hear.
The words that's should be said.
Sometimes they hurt,
Or sound better in your head..

She sat next to the window seal,
Stared blankly out into the world.
Watching each raindrop until it reach the end of its course.

   She wondered where she went wrong,
What did she do to deserve this?
Why did everything have to happen to her?

   She's the girl with the smile that could light up a room.
  
   She's the girl with the personality so beautifully unique

   She's the girl with the heart so kind.

   She's the girl that experienced to much pain to realize this about her self.
Broken by the people she thought she could trust.
Eaten up from the inside out, from all the memories.
Lived with her regrets chained to her ankles.

   She cried to herself every night.
Feeling stuck. wishing for a way out.
But never found one..

   She dreamed of someone you only see in movies.
someone to wrap her up with comfort, and care for her.
That person hasn't come..

But little did she know..

   She's the girl everyone loved.

   She's the girl everyone wanted to be around.

   She's the girl no one could ever forget.

   She was to blinded to realize that these things were true. no matter how many times she heard them, she'd never  fully believe them..

  " She's" me.

Love me.
hate me.
Want me.
forget me.
You saved me from drowning in this ocean of lies,
just to throw me right back in.
assumtions were made.
rumors were spread.
the choice was there.
you didn't have any faith.
but you still took the leap.
broken was my heart.
now shattered is a better word.

Waking up with the sun spread across my face.
Lean over the side of my bed.
Moving at a slow pace.
Matted is the hair upon my head.
Make my way to the bathroom.
Putting on the face everyone see's
I need to hurry I'll have to leave soon.
Wishing I could just leave as I please.
Grabbing my things, heading out the door.
I need to catch the bus.
Left something I needed on my bedroom floor.
Can't go back to get it, my mom will make a big fuss.
I sit there in seat double my size.
In my own world not saying a word.
Awaiting at my destination is no surprise.
Looking out my window everything seems blurred.
Arriving to where we're forced to be.
I'll sit alone in the hallway.
Until it's him I see.
We both will say 'Hey'
Then we'll talk about anything that seems to fit.
loosing track of time until the bell sounds.
other then a few moment I don't like it here not on bit.
Walking on all new grounds.

Ich liebe dich..
We thought in the back of our minds.

Ich liebe dich..
We murmured under our breath.

Ich liebe dich..
We were to scared to say aloud.

Ich liebe dich..
We both knew it.

Ich liebe dich..
You finally shared it.

Ich liebe dich..
And I'll never stop..

"We're all beautiful, wonderful people.
so why did we become so fearful..?"

If I took life for granted,
I would want to die no other way then by drowning.
longing for something so simple would be so eye opening.
Air.

help..

             I

                       s
                         e
                           e
                             m

                                  to
                         ­               be   F
                                                  A
           ­                                           L
                    ­                                     L
                                                             I
                                                               ­ N
                                                              ­      G  
   Deeply...                                                        ­                                   Deeply..
                     ­                         
                

                                                               ­              in LOVE.......
                    

                               With..                                                           ­                YOU.

why cant I breathe without you in my air,
how you've captured me. it's just not fair..

your perfect eyes,
look like the stars filling the skies..

your heart pounding in your chest,
makes me forget all the rest..

how I love seeing your soul like fire,
your heart is my only desire..

break the rage with blood and hate,
but never let it make your fate..

Feelings running all through out my veins,
trying to let them out but they only leave stains.
Other then seeing your perfect face,
That night was a big disgrace.

Took me to the highest of high.
Made me feel as if I could fly.
But somehow I'm left with this pain.
Barely able to stay sane.

Trying to put the impossible back together.
Just so it'll last forever.
Feeling more then lost.
But I'm still aware why our paths crossed.

Even during the grayest of gray.
I'd still choose to stay.
Plenty of new days,but they manage to stay the same.
I guess I'm the one to blame..?

forgetting how to even cry.
sometimes I wonder why I even bother to try.
this roller coaster never seems to stop.
just using this fake smile as a prop.

Fooled you once, fooled you twice.
Some consolation would be nice.
Sitting in my glass box.
listening while every one talks.

Word's of bitterness, word's of hate.
I'm just trying to set a clean slate.
Some say I'm no ordinary girl.
that I'm just just caught up in a whirl.

I bet you cant even tell,
the world we live in can be livin' hell.
when It's to my knees I fall.
there's only one name that I call..

people tell me it's a glimmer of hope.
that I've somehow managed to cope.
I've been holding on.
I wish to see the morning dawn.

it shows me a glimpse off light.
another reason to stand up and fight.
inside of me it implants a thought.
happiness can't be bought.

everything happens for a reason.
these hard times here for only a season.
Just forgive and forget..
there's no need to fret..