I’ve known you for years,
never known you in person,
but I’ve known you.
Despite the fact that I am
madly in love with another,
despite that he very well could
be my soulmate,
despite how incredibly happy he
makes me,
I can’t help but smile when
I think of you.

Listening to those new songs brought
back old memories and future thoughts.
I remember slow dancing with you on
prom night and again at each banquet.
It felt like it was just you and there,
The rest of the world fell away- the music,
the lights, the rest of the room fell away
And it was just you and I.
There’s no need for thinking
and overthinking now.
The answer is crystal clear, even though
you have yet to ask.
Yes.

I want to feel like it’s just you and I forever.
I want to slow dance with you forever.

I wasn’t gluttonous, but for you, ravenous.
It was always lust, never true love.
You gave everything, I was greedy, still.
It wasn’t something for others to envy.
I took pride knowing you were mine.
How could I know that being a sloth,
I’d lose you to my heart’s wrath.

I never expected there to come so
much work with a breakup, but now, I
have all these things to dispose of
and all these memories to forget about.
I must patch the hole in my heart.
I must fix the calendar where it
says September 12th and I must figure
out something to do that day since there
is no anniversary without
you.

Sometimes I sit seaside
and think about you.
I think about the warm,
sun-kissed sand clinging to
my skin, and how much
warmer I’d be if it was you
instead of the sand.

Sometimes I sit seaside
and I think about you.
I think about the cool
breeze and how it tangles
my hair, slightly, and how
I’d rather it be you
leaving knots there
instead of my
heart.

Sometimes I sit seaside,
and I think about you.
I think about the smell
of the beach and it always
smells like you, saltwater
and sunscreen, and how
I’d give anything
to keep that scent in
a jar, in a candle,
just so I can be
reminded of you
even when I’m not
seaside.

In all my years,  I've heard only a handful of people say, "What doesn't **** you makes you stronger."

It might be because it's only half true.

It might be better to say, “What doesn't **** you makes you harder."

What doesn't **** you makes you harder:
-to tear down
-to betray
-to lie to
-to leave
-to forget

But it's a two-sided coin.

What doesn't **** you makes you harder:
-to get to know
-to trust
-to understand
-to get close to
-to remember

Don't be a wall, be a sea, for walls can be torn down, by raindrops alone,  and water is the strongest force on earth, yet gentle to the touch.

Your sapphire eyes rival the deep
morning sky, the abyssal depths
and the richest royal blue ever
hewn from the earth.

When I look into your eyes,
I see a sapphire sea, a sapphire
sky I could get lost in for years
if only, you’d let me.