I was once a child to you
now
false seeds woven into my heart;
you treat me as you would a withering flower.


The cuticles that surround mine.


I lay unforgiven in your eyes
to actions not mine.

At the sight of me,

I die into the image
of a  pair of lungs
incapable of serving it's purpose.


I wish you knew me as the creature I truly am;
The crawling servant.


The lungs who not only take in the air you breathe,

but sing with words bathed in honesty.

I can’t concentrate with all this sweat surrounding mine.

I let go for seconds it seemed,

and the world died into me;

reliving it’s good times.

And I loved, mindless,

like lost kids.

Like you kids.

I loved blindly.

I saw his tongue..press against his lover’s skin..

and slide up to her shoulder.

I was drowning in their image,

tracing the outline of their bodies.

The crowd of lost kids pushed and shoved through me,

denying my presence.

My soul twisting, writhing.

His eyes shut unevenly,

losing their way from reality.

His nails dug into her..

I..

I had never seen such a sight.. so close.. so real..

I was shoved into the visualization of energy itself.

I..I’d never felt so alive;

as the night in which I died.

I howled on the mat of dissolving particles.
The floor decorated with her essence,
her scarlet fluids.
How could they do this to her?

"I love her."
The thought filled my soul.

I felt my insides stretch,
as the cubicles between each of my teeth enlarged;
my mouth flooded with fangs.
My pupils,
they consumed the color that filled the windows to my soul.

I clutched my chest and choked on the sounds of a beast.



I became monster.



I recall a deafening sound erupting from my core,
my surroundings dripping out of sight.
An ambience of dream.

My body ached not of but for pain.
The kind that adorns your skin with shades of sky and ocean,
grass and blood.

I recall ripping sounds, and thick liquids banishing the clear scent of the city,
bathing me.


I remember running.


The memories come in flashes.
I could see dim orbs of light, illuminating a street.
one orb..
two orbs..
three..

I ran past, my head turning constantly to glance behind my shoulder.
They were chasing me.
As they always have.
A realization clicks into place,
and my knees collapse in sync with the moment.

I felt my insides shrink,
as the cubicles between each of my teeth shriveled;
my mouth flooded with gasps.
My pupils, they died into the pool of color that filled the windows to my soul.



I clutched my chest and choked on the sounds of a child.




I became her.

"Ah took a swing."
He said.

His profile raised,
he drops his head to his left, to face me with his lazy eyes.
I was becoming forgetful second by second
of the dull bulb that hung over my nerves; our skin.

He bared his teeth intentionally, it seemed.
"And cracked open his skull."

His eyelids would always droop down.
But he had wild eyes.
We had a description once,
"Satan's eyes." she said. Right before having another seizure.
T'was a god-crazed epileptic; just our luck.

"But ah didn't see 'at.
Y'see, it ull 'ent black. But ah wus swingin'.
Ah know ah was.
Ah felt'et."

He was lying. Those hits were too spot on.
Intentional. Angry. Mad.
Ravishing.

"Ah know y'like me doc. Ah c'n see it in ye face.
Ye legs.
'Ey shake when ah speak 'bout how they bled."

My legs shook..
His voice trailed off into a raspy ending, a whispered sound.
"How they begged."

The inside of my mouth was flooding with saliva.
..How embarrassing..

He smiled.
"'Ee should be ***'nis, ye know. We'd make a pretty couple."

There was a pause, almost too long, before he blinked slowly
and opened his eyes to observe a crack on the wall to his right.
He had complained about it before,
"'Tis too ******' noticeable." He'd say.

He wanted it to be like the other walls.
He wanted it to be neat and gray.
So it wouldn't be excluded, so it wouldn't stand out.
So it wouldn't be treated differently, wrong.
So it wouldn't suffer the injustice of the majority.

He hated things being out of place.
Mostly because he was sick of being out of place himself.
Ironic, I'd say.
He had a passion for making a mess out of his victims.


Ring..

The timer.

Ring..
Ring..

"See ye t'morrow doc."

Ring..

My legs were planted to the ground he smiled on.

Ring..
Ring..

..I think I love you.

Ring..
Ring..


Ring..

I rattled the birdcage,
the empty thing sounding, the ripples filling the air;

I was taken by it's sensitivity,
the echo and lingering of my touch.

My body drifted it seemed,
into lands untouched,
the untamed oxygen filling my lungs.

I was home.

New bones leaped out of my skin
and I was fast and unfeeling in my feet;

I carried the lungs of a lion-
To breathe in all my eyes took in;
and my strands were the blades that caressed the soil underneath my hooves.



I lived for moments long and vivid,
and took them with me the second I woke.

Now I live forever in lands I call my home.