Lawrence Hall
Mhall46184@aol.com
Dispatches for the Colonial Office

                                                        Icetrooper

Dear Icetrooper,

When you go home at night (perhaps to pray)

Does your daughter look up to you and say,

“Daddy -

How many crying children did you drag away

Away from their handcuffed moms and dads today?”

Lawrence Hall
Mhall46184@aol.com
Dispatches for the Colonial Office

                             The Toenail Clippers of Damocles

He who would sit upon a throne of power
Reigning his people from the sovereign’s seat
Let him not neglect in a careless hour
To practice good hygiene upon his royal feet

For suspended above him by a horse’s hair
CLIPPERS, which through and under his toenails pass
Thus beneath that weapon hov’ring in the air
He is cautioned not to be a horse’s (posterior)

And so reposing upon his royal couch
Let not the king be heard to whimper “OUCH!”

Lawrence Hall
Mhall46184@aol.com
Dispatches for the Colonial Office

                        Laundry Day - The Solemnity of All Stains

The washing machine baptizes our busy days:
A shirt freshly stained with this morning’s coffee
Wrinkledy tees in grimy greens and greys
A child’s blue jeans all sticky with toffee

Dish towels we allowed to get old-food smelly
A nice dress sock on which the puppy peed
Blankies from the couch in front of the telly
The terry-cloth that toweled the shaving bleed

To the laundry room where all these wreckages convene
There to be made all fresh and bright and clean –
Thus
Let us give thanks for the washing machine!

Lawrence Hall
Mhall46184@aol.com
Dispatches for the Colonial Office

                         A Gold-Tone Case for Business Cards

A gold-tone case for business cards that read
“(Something) Enterprises Unlimited”
An address that included the word “Suite”
Which was only a bedroom with a folding table

A telephone number that no longer exists
Which never rang a number that no one ever called
And a dead-end @aol.com
For a business that was only a dream

Buried in a suit from the 1980s
The Men’s Store at Sears – The Classic Collection

Lawrence Hall
Mhall46184@aol.com
Dispatches for the Colonial Office


                    Will CBS Now Broadcast from Fox Studios?


          Every morning the editors of the Berlin daily newspapers and    
          the correspondents of those published elsewhere in the *****
          gathered at the Propaganda Ministry to be told by Dr.
         Goebbels or by one of his aides what news to print…

            -Shirer, The Rise and Fall of the Third *****, p. 245


CBS is now as obedient as Fox
Who would have imagined? Who woulda thunk?
Government agitprop on every Orwellian box -
Shoveling deep rund into our funk

Praise to Stephania Jiminez of KSAT in San Antonio; I said it first but she says it much, much better:

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/ksat-anchor-goes-viral-for-speaking-the-truth-about-texas-leaders­/ar-AA1Ibdj3


Lawrence Hall
Mhall46184@aol.com
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
5 July 2025

                     Texas Children Die; Texas Politicians Babble


                           The Governor’s Press Conference
            In Which the Press Were Shut Down Pretty Quickly
                              Guest Star: Ice Station Barbie


I just can’t say enough about our colleagues I just can’t say enough about we are Texans and we come together as one as a family we come together community share quintessential Texas I want to thank my we unite they could have fallen apart double-down relentless when the job is completed 24/ 7 day and night Texans and Americans everyone and I want to thank my what I’m going to sign today every asset magnitude process proclamation immediate and I just can’t say enough about ongoing gratitude in advance to President Trump and all his administration and I just can’t say enough his love for Texas I want to thank Governor Abbott absolutely devastating he loves Texas grieving beautiful children all the resources of the federal government walking alongside each other community I’ve visited with the president already he will honor that assets on the ground crisis weather event alerted airframe Coasties Texas assets request customs and border protection skill set resource Department of Homeland Security response flying acronyms entities utilized FEMA standing at an enhanced level plugged in engaged fulfil role amazing you are an example to the nation hearts are with you and walking beside you fixed-wing aircraft airframe helicopters fixed-wing helicopters efforts engaged talking to the president throughout the day families folks number one priority is people process public infrastructure strong you are an example responding helping neighbors hurting grieving God process help prayers are with you President Trump and Melania are praying for you prayer amazing multiple stage agencies partners my thanks to and to and request and thank you for being here an important message I’ve been to a number of disasters impressed with Governor Abbot’s leadership proud grateful for men and women standing behind us here we are all reacquainted rejoined with their family members it’s who your family is we come together as a family as Texas this is who our family is we owe it to them the governor and his team will be relentless family it means a lot we appreciate President Trump and you before I was crazy enough to run for congress ha ha we came down here to blah blah it hits home personally I can’t say enough about extraordinary I can’t say enough I can’t say enough leadership this unfortunate circumstance reached out responding Army corps support and other stuff teamwork collaboration far from finished the job prayerful stuff we’re dealing with finger-pointing and second-guessing and Monday-morning quarterbacking circumstances I understand that parents and media heroic efforts finish the job be with the people pray I’m the only one at this table who lives on the Guadalupe River I barely got home I ushered in a crew fifty-year lawyer I saw first-hand the body bags helicopter ride nobody saw this coming arm in arm hand in hand process time now for recovery toilsome task we we we I I I me me me stay together and we’ll get this done thank you on the behalf of as I look around the room I don’t see differences I see one team working together our community one team those in peril those who are lost sees this day prayer thank God my heart is broken we will not stop Madame Secretary your federal team lifesaving we will our teams FEMA border patrol partners Coast Guard work forward state personnel one last thing most common word prayer prayers are answered in so many ways prayer might be the reason the water stopped rising prayer does work your prayers have made a difference continued prayers pray so much never imagined prayers matter we thank God almighty God has blessed Texas prayer…

(A few reporters were then allowed to ask a few questions which were answered mostly with vagaries and filler-language.)

Lawrence Hall
Mhall46184@aol.com
Dispatches for the Colonial Office

                                      My Daughter at The Last Supper

And whilst they were at supper, Jesus took bread, and blessed, and broke: and gave to his disciples, and said: Take ye, and eat. This is my body…”

          -Saint Matthew 26:26-29, Douay-Rheims 1899 American
           Edition via Bible Gateway

And my daughter said unto our Lord,
“Excuse me…excuse me, Sir, but is this matzoh fresh?
Did you check the expiration date?
Is it really kosher?  Is it from a fair-trade source?”

Amen or oymen?

Judas has left the building.