I need not permission
to resign from my physical self

I can sit under the oaks
and listen to their sense

Shadow and raze out my
earthly bane and exisence

the flowers protest against discovery
for their treatise are sooth

and i will lay here for eternity
with no ague or war
accept their word

I will harness myself
with leavy quilts

In this shining state of mental perfection
Nirvana, I am intrenchant

Sweet notes from ancient trees
and young fawn with flower
palter through wheat

and into my soul
we are all hand in hand

So often i feel the words
on my tongue
and you can taste them
when you kiss me
you know they exist on my brain

So often we manipulate
and distort our paragraghs
to ensure those words protection
but we know
silently we stare at dim lights
and we smile
like overused expressions
we test our limits
making sure not to repell
eachother away

And we love it
we hide that word combination
amoungst dizzy
and scattered body language
thrown into dust

We fear unknown implications
of the destructive beauty
caused by the words
" i love you "

Like the celestial
birthing of stars

i continue to evolve
and burst into light

regardless that I
live in a vacuum

pass me the liquor
since when is it so warm?
it still burns my throat
i love the acid
its sweeter
this nectar is new
how much did you pay for this?
it tastes different from the one i had the day before
and the day before that,and before that.
before,before,before.

wait!
how much have you given me?
you say i've sunken this bottle all on my own?
i've forgotten who you are
this liquor
is fluid no more
its mushy and solid
this rat poison

i just opened my eyes
how did you get here?
my love how long have you been passing
your tongue
down my throat?
how long have i been asleep?
you were my constant liquor
just a few moments ago
has this addiction gotten to my head?

its all well
as long as my imagination
continues to make me think
that you are here
its all well

i shall drink more and more
if it means feeling you again

you kissed me a week ago
you tasted like
ashes
like burnt emotion
inhaling exhaling i told you
i hated watching you die

it had been two years since you had kissed me
this time i could taste your revived
true
strawberry breaths
sizzled after only a couple seconds
i tasted what i had seen
your inhales
and milky exhales

you abandoned me that night
so i thought-
he knows he slowly destroys his lungs
something must have happened for him
to not to give a ****
now that you left me
once again
i see
your sadness
you have passed it down to me
although i was faultless
you broke my heart and soul

i bought my first pack of cigarettes
cheers to you

What a thought
To never get lost in the past
The past is the past
It’s the past because it’s the past

Well I would rather be in the past
Because I was happy in the past
The only time I truly laughed was in the past

I loved you in the past
You loved me in return in the past
In this present and future
I am dust unlike the past

I would rather live in the past
Bright and enchanting in the past
Than be bones, unloved by you, opposite of the past

I am only able to smile
When I’m deluded in my past
So why escape the past
If being sane depends on laboring in the past
You loved me in the past
If I’m a ghost, creeping by your side.
I must go back to that place on the road
In our past
Where we left off in the past
I’ll be stuck there in the my past
I’ll wait for you to meet me
On a now eroded, non-existent path.