Can i cry?
Would you blame me?
Can i scream at the top of my lungs with hate?
Would you be so kind as to let me feel something,
ANYTHING,
other than this solitary way of life.
You are no longer in control,
my strings have been cut.
Your pull on me can neither sway me nor tame me
Your hold on me is broken.
So now what?
Will you hate me?
Will you shun me?
Will you give up once you have lost the power?
If so i cry for you,
because no one will ever please you.
Your path is so narrow, how can you stand?
This balancing act you hold, my it is impressive.
So tragic though....
i will pray for you.

Will you lend me your ear,
Will you hear my mundane and otherwise ignored words?
Gushings of the heart that fall upon deft ears.
She is in all normalcy a girl that otherwise falls as another face
But all the same...
Can i tell you about her?
To me she is above expectations of any women.
I often find myself losing all train of thought when we speak
diving in and out of consciousness while pursuing the thoughts.
Why me? Shes so much more than I am.... What does she see?
As i think to myself she catches my wondering and mistakes it for disinterest.
I do not dare tell her how imperfect I feel next to her yet so complete.
So
An apology, a kiss, a smile...that will have to do for now.
My ramblings of her must surly bore you.
I apologize to you too.
But to be next to someone that makes your breathe leave your lungs,
to have your heart not only beat so quick it might burst but for it to burn with lust for them,
One can not help but want to speak out, create, or express their passion in a beautiful manner.
Lingering self doubts fade as we kiss
Uncomfortable stares dissipate in a tight embrace.
I fell whole, I pray to know she does too.
But i am to much of a coward to ask, fearing the answer.
I pleaded for you to let me tell you about her.
I have told all I can.
Thank you stranger, for your ear, your silence and your patience with such a rambling.

Lets live it live she says!
to live live....
let live and let live
lies of lives that surround us how do what we know we are alive?
I live for me
live for life, for love for little moments!
I live to live it live.
Live the concerts that bring us joing
Live like the angry moments on wrestling shows.
Live for the love that we feel holding the one we want to live with.
Live is to Live
and to live live is to feel it all

When you see day;
I will see night.
You will wake,
as I begin to sleep.
Our talks will be scarce,
our time time together will be short.
Excited hello's,
meaningful goodbyes.
My tears for you will flow for a year,
but our moments of laughter will last longer.
We will meet again;
not now,
maybe not next year,
but soon my dear.
Tears of joy and laughter will be muffled by the gripping hugs,
i will bury my head into your shoulder and just hold you.  
Just like before,
Just like **always.

Can you hear them now;
The white lights exploding above our heads?
Sweet smell of smoke and canned peaches.
The door shakes violently against the concrete walls.
Steel can make such a horrid noise.
Scratching and scarping of it like nails on a chalk board.
Aww, your shaking,
Like a puppy in the rain.
Why are you scared?
I told you we are safe.
I will let no one or thing hurt you.
Pat , Pat , Pat your head,
Your safe with me, I love you dear.
No soldiers will take you,
No bombs will burn out your light,
No amount of smoke will **** us;
No fear in this bomb shelter tonight.

Stop it!
I cant take it!
Your yelling at me again!
What did i even do?!
I asked you a question...
that means we must yell?
Why do you assume these things about me??
Because i am sad it means I'm depressed?
Because i am stressed that means I'm suicidal?
Can you hear yourself right now?!
Can you comprehend what you are yelling about because i am lost.
Your subject is always changing,
You always find something to say.
I left that world behind long ago...
You still want to bring it up today?
After what we went through, after the talks we had;
You are going to put it back in my face that I had a bad past.
You may never believe what I do, But people change,
They can and always will be.
Well that is except for you,
Stuck in the rut of your own world
I do not wish to leave you behind.

I am stuck down by words of hate,
I am beaten with ignorance,
I am scared as i wonder down these roads;
I am aimlessly looks for my love.
I am sad to say i have not found them yet,
I am hopeful though...
I am hopeful that they are out there; wondering down theses same roads that i am, aimlessly looking for me.
I am sure i will find them one day
I am sure of that.
I just hope i find them soon, cause it is hard to breath out here.