She was the moon to me
Apart of the Daily routine
A thing of beauty
Wears the cratored scars of her past and puts them on display
But does it with the grace that's usually described with a floor length silk dress
She had her phases
Most noted and complimented was when she was full
But my favorite when she was waning crescent ready to be new
She was the moon to me
Something I couldn't keep
And something I couldn't keep my eyes off of

You attempt to comfort me
Yet my discomfort is being without you
I torture myself with the past
Reliving my mistakes
Backtracking paths of broken glass
Barefoot and bleeding regret
Striving to forget the past
Be in the now
HOPING for a future together
For I do not deserve another chance
Yet I wish for nothing more
I lay my head to sleep & wish you were beside me
Accompanied by emptiness
Fall asleep and dream of you
Dreams,
Where I feel whole again
Where this hole in my heart is filled
Only to wake up to the unholy truth
I am without you

I was scared to give myself to you
But now that I have, I'm terrified
Explained to you what I'd never explained before
And from atop of your wall you said you understood
You say time will bring down your wall
But I can't help but notice these bricks your stacking
The harder I try, the higher your wall seems to be
The only time you let me in
Is in the solitude of home
In public you put your mask on
As tho the opinions of others dictated your heart
I step back with attempts of strategy
Only for you to change your game
I've put my love for you on display
Only for you to pocket it
How can you say you feel the same
When you don't show the same
Displaying shame
Embarrassment
Cut your strings
Release yourself from this puppeteer
And I will catch you
Hold you forever
Be the man you should have had
I'm ready to give you my all
Just show me you're willing to receive it

Ignorance may be bliss
But knowledge is power
So here I stand, king of the hill
Rarely challenged, never fallen off
Always asked for guidance
What do you expect from me?
Must I fix everything?
Am I surrounded by children?
Unable to cross the street of thought
So I hold your hand to show you the way
Only to be asked “How’d we get here?”
Fingers pointed in every direction
Because blame is easier than self-reflection
Scared of what you may see behind your mask
Living your life like a magic show
Smoke, mirrors, slide of hand and verbal misdirection
Unimpressed…
You may continue your double speak
While I read between the lines
Are you honestly surprised?
How do I remain king?
Simple my child
Truth, observations, and actions
If you ever grow up
You will become powerful

I find it so difficult to follow what you say
For what comes out isn't what your actions display
I don't understand
I thought you were different
Thought I made a difference
But I find myself back to square one
One of being alone
Only being able to trust myself
No more trickery
For that was the last time you pull the verbal wool over my eyes

Words written of walls brought down
Only to be let down
Sure your words expressed were genuine
But the words I held most importantly
Revoked
The grass will always look greener on the other side
Must mean I am the backyard
Not maintained for the viewing of others
But the one you retreat to for privacy
Do I question these actions
Or do I bite my tongue
Bite in fear of walls rebuilt
Walls I may never again scale
I lay alone pondering these saddened thoughts
While sounds of joy floods my ears
I must make these moments irrelevant
For you may never appreciate how bright I could shine for you

Laying together, wrapped like ivy to a building
I look to your eyes, viewing something withheld
I kiss your lips so they part with the words your eyes hold tight
Quivering with uncertainty, they say... I want you
Lustfully I grab your perfectly curvaceous hips closer
Kiss your enticing lips
Hips undulating in unison
Senses heightening with every breath
Clothes removed as if time was ticking
Urning to feel us together
While I ****** deep, I am captivated by your beauty
Skin so flawless, begging to be caressed
Tattoo like quicksand, pulling me in
Moments of ecstasy, you state felt like forever
Feeling what I had not ever felt
A ****** of which Everest would fall short of
We lay there wearing only what we arrived with into the world
Holding each other like ivy to a building
Basking in amazement of a moment shared

I step to quickly without reviewing my  intentions
Only to walk barefoot into the shredded glass of my mistakes
I'm bleeding regrets of poor decisions
I found someone worth fighting for
But I've placed myself against the ropes
Struggling to throw a punch
But I've tied my arms behind my back
I must break through these restraints 
Stop traveling in circles of my repetition 
Notate my mistakes, mend what I can
Study hard, and apply when tested
So I may tread softly

With you I'm at a lack of words but I'll do my best. 
Good thing we agree on emotions to fill the rest. 
I feel blessed to have been able to meet you
And only you have had the effect on me that you do

Everything you do and say, we seem to blend
It's weird to say, but I could get used to this trend
You deny it all day long
You're gorgeous, you and that fact need to get along

I love how your smile lights up your face
And only can make my heart race
I can't express the way you feel
And the way you make my heart flutter, it's the real deal

But not necessarily in the way you think
Your mind will be in a roller rink
Round and round in circles
I don't want to hear talk of ridicules

You make me happy like I can't explain
Like aerodynamics lift an aero plane 
I feel like myself once again
Like how my skin feels when it'***** by rain

It's refreshing like the quench of a thirst 
But there is one thing I must say first
You are something special
So amazing it's meeting my thresh hold

You make me want more, bring me to beg for a kiss
I'd drop to my knees for such bliss
The way you look in my eyes
Brings me up more than any of my highs

The connection we share
The way you care
I'm blown away
And here I lay

Wondering what you're thinking
Trying to be smooth with winkings 
I can't believe how hard I try to impress you
The feel of your lips and my urging, it's true

I can't help but think about it
I don't need mapquest to map it
I know what I'd have to do
But it makes me pause, is this the same feeling by you

I really don't know how to bring this to an end
But it's something I want to explore to no end
What fate has for us in store
I have no idea, just know I want more

I'm blown away by your essence
But I can't get enough of your presence
I'm drawn to you like moth to a flame
And the more you let me in, I know you feel the same
I love hearing the way I make you feel
Almost like a fairy tail, it feels surreal
Like I'm in a dream
And yet it seems
Like time stands still, like a bottomless cup I cannot fill
I want you to engulf me, like surrounding air
I want to feel you like fingers thru my hair
I want to enjoy you from head to toe
I want to feel you inside and out like you don't even know

As I arrive to the door, my heart flutters
Speaking to me with anxious mutters
And just then I hear the click of the door unlock
I see your face, your smile, and I was perfectly shocked

As you pulled me in, and our lips met
Emotions flooding, leaving me soaking wet
Never felt this before, but this ignorance is bliss
This moment was flawless, the perfect kiss 

We spend the day with literature and laughter
A mental film of memories that I have captured
Back to where the day began, but anticipating goodbyes 
You wanted me to kiss you, I could see it in your eyes

I kissed you on the couch, which was just the beginning
The moment following, simply astonishing
You are the most amazing thing I've ever felt
My body, ready to explode, & then I melt
I'm comfortable with you like never before
Something I want not to change, but to explore

I am a man obsessed with perfection
No amount of smoke and mirrors will lead me to misdirection
Like an arrow I fly straight into my target, my goal
Falling short is not an option; I must accomplish my journey and feel whole
 
Although I feel as though I’ve been placed into the pit of Sparta
Punished for my greediness, looking up at the light of accomplishment, wondering how it’d feel on my skin
But that is only where I begin
Fore I shall climb from the darkness of the pit and become a martyr 

And I’ll do it with ease, if that’s what it takes
Give it everything I’ve got, know the stakes
I know this will one day consume me, ruin me, destroy me
But until then, I take who I am and display for everyone to see
 
I’ve struggled all my life and now I’m going to make it
This isn’t no ******, there’s no reason to fake it
Open up to show my true colours, for better or worse, rhythm or rhyme
Let the earth spin into darkness, I’ve got nothing but time
 
Knock me down, I’ll be returning like a mummy, bringing plaques and placing a curse
I’m only getting better, for my competition it’s bound to get worse
Nothing can keep me, down not even the weather
Like Icarus I’ll gather my feathers
 
Spread my wings wide and fly
Leave the sky
Go passed the moon and to the sun
Make it melt, bask in revenge and call it done
 
Fore I am a man obsessed with perfection
I am the juggernaut of progression
Although only I see myself continuing this momentum
Irrelevant, I will seek my destination running through shadows like a phantom

I constantly find myself lost in thought
Searching through mental maps of you
Recalling trails and pathways 
Wondering how we got here
Then I stop trying to see the trees from the forest
Sit back and enjoy the view
Of you
Lay back and see your figure in the clouds 
The clouds that I float on
Traveling to places I had not thought of traveling
Reaching heights I had not dared to climb
Taking me to phanstamagoric levels of ecstasy
Beautiful landscape I stare at
Beautiful mindscape I wish to explore
Continue the mental maps
Words cannot wrap what I feel for you
It's so new
Every experience better than the last
Accept the past
But adjust the scope, I'm focusing on the now
Where I want to be
For there is no other place to be
Except to be here now