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I have read too many books, listened to too many songs
I don’t find anything new anymore
I am tired of relating to the girl that looses
The girl that gives it her all but still has to accept defeat
The girl who gets tossed aside conveniently
The girl left to mournfully reminisce
The girl who keeps on scrubbing her skin to make herself clean again
Filled with guilt and regret engulfing her like a dark cloud.
The girl who gets shattered down but has to keep on smiling
The girl who is never the one, never even a choice
The girl who builds up fantasies and expectations only for them to come crashing down
The overlooked, the unwanted, the undesirable and the unfortunate
The girl who gets half glances filled with sympathy and dismissal
The girl who was never given the chance to showcase her love
The girl whose kindness they use and exploit
Leaving her with nothing but misery and despair
The girl who trusted the wrong souls, gave into temptation
The girl whose skin crawls with repentance and shame
The girl filled with void and gloom
Giving up little pieces of her heart and soul
To keep on fighting her battles, trying to find hope
To win the raging war.
My first one on the platform, hope you like it!
Bright sunlight, blinding strobe lights,
Shimmering glittering stars and searchlights
I struggle to keep my eyes open.
Laughing, giggling and glasses clinking
Cheering and waves of gleeful sounds
I try to focus on one thing but cannot focus on anything,
It’s too good to be true, I wonder.
I start questioning my own sense of being.
Trying to understand where I fit in,
And suddenly everything turns dark.
Pitch black and dreadful,
Unilluminated, spine-chilling void,
Pin drop silence, deserted abyss.
I am scared and disoriented,
How can things change so rapidly?
I shudder as I step forward into the unknown
Then, I heard it.
Perfect symphony of sound
A crack of steady stream of light peers in through a crack
I punch through the frustration, shattering the veil.
Glass floor, smiles and perfect rhythm
Welcoming faces beckoning me towards them,
I feel at ease, certain and peaceful,
Harmony adorned with beautiful light,
I see clearly, hear perfectly and I finally smile.
#losing&finding #balance #light&dark

— The End —