You left as quickly as you came
leaving echos rippling thought
thick silence
as I lay sorely wanting
on sheets barely rustled
with your coldness
and my aching.

We quell our thirsts with drops of words
From dew dripped quills.
To taste the flavour of phrases
It is delicious to the mind.
The senses revel in symphonies
Made stories-poetry.
To write the world is not a novel
But rather inspire verses.

I thought--perhaps--
that
you and I could...
Your laughing...stop!
I'm serious.
Your eyes eat hungrily
the words from my mouth.

No--please--don't follow me

I want this to be a surprise
when I come out again
I'll be smiling,
and you

you wont be laughing.

Your hands were soft
they were knowing-and
forgettable.

When my mind goes blank
I thank God
because I hate waiting for
eternity to come.

Its another day
the sun is high in its dome
and the humans make their sounds
-its loud.
I wish to crush them;
to hear their bones crack
and their tissues tenderize.
Then all the sound would echo
then ebb away.
Their would be no human noise!
and my mind could drown free.

His arms strong that hold me tight
They keep me safe from what’s outside

But when does safe become obsessive
A love that is taken to far

When does our home become a prison?
And my lover become a guard

When does a soft touch rise to a punch?
And my love turn to fear of whenever he comes

How do I escape from being a slave?
To a man that loves me too much

How can I hide from this monster he’s become
Or will I disappear into the strange dark shadows

To be what he wants
To be no more

I mourn for you
these tears that pool within my eyes
spill below its brim for you.
I cry for you
I scream till my throat's tissue  's raw
and this meek voice cracks for yearning you.

You lie there still
so still you sleep under covers of silk
while IVs feed nutrients to you.
Each eye closed lets slip a saline tear
that wets the pillow beneath you.

Each hour we are thrown down to eternity,
each minute we wait in unknowing fear
for each second that passes I clutch desperately to you
not wanting you to abandon me too.

----and yet----

Your life slips below my fingertips
pools and wets my swollen feet.
your death bed stinks of suffering
and my heart---my heart breaks
it BREAKS from loving thee.

Twist and turning disquieting
I'm going to BURST
this hurting is building
its unbearable
intolerable
I  feel  my  world   is   losing   grip
my sweetness died when you left me.

I mourned for you
So many tears have slipped below their brim for you
I screamed for you
my tissues raw from calling you
you never looked back as I ran for you
Fallen on knees I pounded the ground in defiance of you
I hate you, I hate you, I NEVER could have loved YOU!

---But then,

Your anguish was felt so strongly
its locks my bones
from head to toe
I fall---they break
is all this feeling from your pain?

---and then,

You healed me through
your memory kept my life among the living
your lingering smell
your fading laugh
kept the knife from meeting flesh

you!

Through your death, you saved my life
for that I will always love you.

Sit and I will make this short

After many years considering
your crude remarks
your awful gawks
I find that I have come utterly
to hate you utmost fully.

Your very presence infuriates me
I'd **** you if I had to stomach for it.

Instead I'll have to be content
to watch your pride whither
and buckle within itself.

We were timid
i laid my eyes on you at first
then looked away.
my heart beat
fast
so fast
sofastsofastsofast.
At first I wanted to talk,
we talked
we talked and laughed and smiled
then
nothing.
Nothing then hugged then kissed
we
kissed....
and it was
nothing but
bliss.

Upon this rocky shore we find
as we sit most content
a bird so small that as it flies
we barely see a speck.

It lands---disturbing particles
of loose boulders only ants would fret
and chirps its song of mating
to its mate nestled upon her eggs.

We sit, you and I,
your hand on mine
so slight I barely feel
My glance slides down protectively
to make sure your still there.

The sun sets fire throughout the sky
the horizon blurs two realms
and as the birds sing their lullaby
we two remain here perched.

On the edge I look out
I wonder nothing, I think nothing
all that has long been done.
Like a novel yet unfinished I hang
-disordered, and shamed-
from your disinterest.
My mind is not blank
just nonexistent.
I stand and watch the cars rush by
busy with a sense of purpose to
the people inside.
One step froward
is eternally backwards
over the ledge that I look out.

I smile
its huge
its spreads and reaches my eyes.
I laugh
again I laugh
....and again I laugh
giddy and restless with waiting.
I bite my bottom lip
but yet my happiness
coughs through my lips.
I have to close my eyes
for appearance sake
I don't know what to say
Should I let you see me this way?
my chest collapses suddenly
when you turn your body fully to me
its hard to fight this feeling--see--
I tremble uncontrollably!
do I want to stop--no.
I love the way you make me feel!
and smile, and laugh.

This is us.
Your fingers
your chest
your legs
your tongue tasting my sweetness.
(you call it my sweetness)
My body responds to yours
each heartbeat timed
with the surge of sporadic pulses.

Remembrance flows
like silk sliding through
coarse fingers
unwilling to grasp what
was once there.

Space fills up the vortex
we are pulled into. The
Deconstruction of your
psyche trembles
with consciousness
barely visible below the
layer of breath
that separates that air from
sliding molecules.

Blue lips coupled with pale skin
while drifting down that inverted air
your mass settles to the sedimentary trough.
Buried below green blades-pliable tenderness, caresses each
stiff limb.

Eyes seeing past let the wind
which- push your dwelling to and fro-
blink your eyes. Happiness is a concept
you once thought you knew. That I know.

We talked
and I grew attached.
I only knew your name
and the words you let float along a phone line.
You didn't want to meet
---I needed to see your face---
talking wasn't enough
I wanted contact
to feel your touch.

I want now to apologize.
this does not come easily
but know
from my heart to yours, I am bleeding out
love, nourish your own
and forgive me
for I did not know
the truth.

The flash explodes
and from that box a picture forms
of meyou and
just like that

its over.

Condensation fogs my quarter window
and as my other self becomes concealed
behind my cloud of warmed breath
I fabricate a tale
that I am the imagination
of my own reflection.

Amidst the fire's crackle
the wood pops
and black smoke rises coating my chimney's
inner side. I stare into its blue core
and see the elemental force burn
intense!
then die out....

Who then is real
what if I am my own reflection
a thought living inside a mind
planning out my day
while she lives her own life.

How can we really know if we exist
if we never truly know that we're awake
Are we dreaming, or are we the dream?

Think!

And even if you win what then?
Will the clouds part
and rain down paradise.
Will you kick me down and make me beg?
Make me BEG!
**** me if you MUST
DO SO!
Just that I may die and know not
the intolerable filth you sing.
You poisoned my ears.
ENOUGH!

Time is
fragile.
It peers from behind
only to
disappear.
Fleeting on sprightly foot
my lungs burn
from a lack of
air
trying to find a way to come
close
to you.
our time is
dwindling.
Passing until
it turns an
un-reversable corner.
but I'll find you soon
and our time apart
wont seem so
gaped.

The fires came and spread
they inhaled the land
and let out ash
that covered both land and sky.
The fires devoured plant and bough
once proudly reaching for sun and sky
but when the devastation died
the foliage now was blackened and dry.
This fire left nothing behind
left not even a babes young cry
it ate as fierce as a monsters
appetite,
the life that once was full of pride.
Shamed and shackled we looked on
unable to stop what nature spawned
until it all was quite
with only the crackling of the
dying fire.

Within the distant fray I sway
leaves from a deadened bough
release me
shriveled, brittle
to a hardened ground.
------------------
Once I thought I'd seen a butterfly
I watched its wings

touch and gape
touch and gape
touch and
fall

like a dying star
I witnessed its fall
swallowed by an ocean
coloured by the receding sun.

You are the moon
and I the ocean
when you are full
bright and beautiful
I cannot help but
be drawn to you.

Eventually time will pass us by
Just as a gust sent from the sky
Just like the sweet morning dew
The sun that rises cures the brew
Just like the witch aloof from you
She brews, she brews? Just like the dew
On now the ticking of the clock upon my wall of flowered pots
The tick and tock repetitive
Tie time that sheds upon my head
It flies away just like a bird, a bird?
Oh yes a lovely dove.

I heard your heart between lungs
filled
seeping with
the chill
from a body to frail
to keep in health.

With each shattered breath
that parted
lips
blue and cracked
I saw a sliver of your light
fade
into
blackness.

We stood
amidst that downy blanket
of
cold. I held you perhaps
too close?

Feeling your wasting
seeing
emaciated
your body I trembled
as you trembled from my
briefest touch.

Lowering your
essence
below
I felt you finally
free
to float above
time and space.

When I left you standing by that
still lake
I fully expected your image
to remain reflected,unmoving in the waters
surface.
Instead I made my journey back
and you were nowhere to be seen.
I stood for hours beckoning
but nothing cared for my inquiry.
When night then fell
the stars shone bright
and thus I realized
that in those stars
I saw your eyes.

She walks along that pathway
With tattered dress from the thicket
Watching as the mass of earth
***** her down, ***** her down.

And sink she does so far, so far
A scraping scream gurgles up
And spreads into the pitching earth
Earth wet with sweat and blood
She screams into her sweat and blood.

Smothering, the heat takes over
As the earth continues on
To **** her down so far down
In every drop of sweat that bulbs
And with so much blood she breaths in death’s humidity
And grasps for something tangible within reality.

Into the eyes of death she looks
Unnerved he watches speaking not.
A quivering lip cannot sway he to take a hold her hand in his.
And watch he does with unmoved eyes his elusive pray sink further down.
The indifferent earth breathing in the sweat and blood swallows her
Which solidifies within her lungs. He laughs as she marches on with tune
With death’s macabre band so far down. So far down, she’s ****** down.