Why not
Why not lay here
let the room spin above us
while the ceiling fan holds still.
Let's watch as everything else spins away
****** through a hole
that leaves all else dark.

Now that I have you
I find I can't stand you
I wish you'd just go away
for my eyes go a flutter
when he walks on over
pulling me along the way.

My lips, pressed against hers in the dark,
under a streetlight
with only our shadows witness to our love.
She stopped
and pulled a cigarette out from her pocket.
The tiny flicker of a flame lighted,
she breathed in the smoke,
and let it out in a slow exhale.
The smoke rose,
curling and dancing
amongst the wind
like white silk it wrapped
around nothing
until it dispersed.

When will I make it stop!

When will I hear the sporadic
rise
and fall
of her chest before she was eternally still,

I could barely stand it!
We were so close to our destination
that my impatience would be the end of us.
I waited and walked and watched
until she came closer to that dark alleyway
which I knew she would turn down.
I knew she would wait outside
the door wedged between and below brick walls
faded and crumbling,
distorted
and discolored
from the erosion of the winter winds.
I would take her then.
Then I would take her.

Am I not allowed to be angry
when that time comes and all you give are singular respnoses
I grit my teeth
I grind them
each tooth clinks against the other
like domino pieces pulled together in a heated game.

Can we end this cat and mouse game
or am I too presumptous in even thinking that youre playing?
Am I even on your radar, or have you forgotten me already

How do I pretend and act as if I'm not waiting (impatiently)
for a call from you, to even hear your voice, I can only feign apathy
for so long.

My hands were cold,
but not for long.
They wouldn’t be for long.
She turned a corner
and I followed,
but
could I control myself
long enough.

Oh God.

I could feel myself hardening
just watching her before me.
Watching her
my love,
the way she shook out her curls
letting the snow flakes
          tumble in
                  clumps
                         falling sporadically...
some melting
while others settled
on her shoulders
    and some
still falling from her grace to the ground.

The way she ran her hands over
her upper arms
to keep them warm maddened me!

I could see each goose bump
that grazed her palms
and each small shiver
   that
     happened
  in
    spasms
as she quickened her pace.

I will warm you.
I broke out in a smile.  
The winds beat against my teeth
numbing them,
but they would be warm
      soon enough.

I sat idly waiting,
watching her through her bedroom window.
She indeed was the one,
and how happy she would be when I told her
she would be my first.
Coming down the steps
and
walking out the door
I watched her still,
anxious for the moment to come
when I would hold her in my arms.
It was snowing out;
the contrast of her dark skin
against
the white snow,
a mere smudge she would have seemed
if not for the golden glow that surrounded her,
it made me to recall
a single chrysanthemum struggling in a field of snow.
I closed my eyes
imagining the taste of her,
wondering if she would have the scent of a flower,
or
if she would smell of fear
when I took her,
sliding myself into her gently
-never brusquely-
but in a way that would supersede even her
if only for a moment.

We brushed the soil from our cloths
laced our laces
tied our knots
and hair back in one.

We exited that place with empty souls
and hearts filled with sorrow.

The almighty sounds  rang in our ears
while we slept we dreamed dreams
of our experience.

Some of us kept our eyes open
till they shriveled and fell from their
places. While others laid down their heads
and slept forever.

Others yet kept on,
walking like ghosts through this world
waiting for any comfort
or abrupt oblivion.