Everyday, everything seems the same
Everyday, nothing seems to change

Everyday, I try to make a change
Everyday, I feel I'm going insane

Everyday, I try to take a break
Everyday, I always make mistakes

Everyday, I cry the same old tears
Everyday, I add time on to my years

Everyday, I feel the same each day
Everyday, it eats my heart away

I believe I have logic
Yet, I cannot find my brain

I believe I can see the future
Yet, I can not find myself

I believe I have a purpose
Yet, it might have been a dream

I believe I used to have a voice
Yet, I never make a sound

I believe I do what I've been told
Yet, I don't want anyone to come around

I can feel their eyes are watching me
Yet, no one is her, so I lose myself again

Sometimes I think I'm happy here
Yet, sometimes I still pretend

I can't remember how this got started
Yet, I can tell you exactly how it will end

I' hide my feelings
Yet, I never look for them

I'm still alive
Yet, I only bleed a little each day

I'm writing this on a little piece of paper
Yet, hoping someday I might find it

I wish this could have been any other way
Yet, I don't know what else I can do

Though I've tried before to tell her
Of the feelings I have for her in my heart

Every time that I come near her
I just lose my nerve as I've done from the start

Every little thing she does is magic
Everything she do just turns me on

Even though my life before was tragic
Now I know my love for her goes on

Do I have to tell the story
Of a thousand rainy days since we first met?

It's a big enough umbrella
But it's always me that ends up getting wet

I resolved to call her up
A thousand times a day

Ask her if she'll marry me
In some old fashioned way

But my silent fears have gripped me
Long before I reach the phone

Long before my tongue has tripped me
Must I always be alone

Excuse my writings today

I've been filled with love, hurt and pain

                              Sorry

I'm bad
I did it
It's my fault
Blame me
Sorry
What can I say
I forgot
I wasn't thinking
I should know better
It slipped my mind
OK tomorrow
Remind me

When I think about love
I think about God

When I think about hate
I think about ISIS

I fall out of hope
When I'm far from home

Don't tell me on the phone
That your all alone

It's easy to decieve
It's easy to believe

I spend my time alone
Believing all those lies

Now it makt me sad that loving won't be true
You make me cry tears of blue

I now no longer frown
I now look for passion

My mind is now complete
I no longer live in misery

I will always stay true
To the one that holds true

It so hard to breath,
when I say I want to leave....

My heart hurts so,
when I see your tears......

A life without you,
brings up my inner fears.....

Even though it's time to go,
lets make it slow.....

We've tried so many times,
which causes us to lose our minds......

If faithfulness would last,
we would never have to talk trash.....

When I look at you,
I can only see through you.....

With only a glimpse of our past,
is why I tried to make it last.....

But your actions today,
give me no reason to stay.....

Your love I hold dear,
which will only fade away.....

This is to you and to me,
to find love another way.....

Where our fears,
try to become our God...

Where our life is guided,
by misprinted lies...

Where truth and honesty,
is far and few between....

Where trust in one,
is a hard thing to accept....

Where words are spoken
with numb feelings....

Where distractions,
take us from our path....

Where manipulation,
is part of everyday life....

Where people hold on to,
resentment and anger.....

Where the word commitment,
is losing it's meaning.....

Where known flaws,
are our biggest enemy in life....

Where is the direction of society?

Where are the morals in life?

Where are the real inspirational figures?

Are we taught correctly and then change?

Are not taught and just adapt to our surroundings?

Where and when does life really change?

How does one change their ways?

How does one change their thoughts?

How does one change hurt,
and hurtful ways?

Why does one compromise their life?

One can only try to change...

The one thing that I have learned
is to stay faithful to our creator.....

I feel like I'm under
The distant clouds of gray

Look for a dream
Just to make you stay

My head is spinning around
Just to see your face

Help me
I'm falling from her grace

Looking for the answers
Looking for the mistakes

A life without you
Is like a temple without stone

What do I have to do
To let you know that I need you

I tremble inside
Thinking of a life without you

I'm turned under
Falling from your grace

I wonder what
Life would without you

You never told me a lie before
I not sorry I met you know or never will

The memories we have were once so full.
You keep me turning around

Someone help me
I'm falling from her grace

Just when one goes through so many hearts...
Just when one feels that they can never love again...
Just when one builds their wall that is to be periment....
Just when one feels they can never feel that first love feeling....

It then happens!!!

How?
I would never think and I never had a clue....

I guess in life anything is possible.

I always figured I had a better chance of winning the lotto....
There are always mutuals things that two like about each other....
Then finding a girl that cares for you, yet likes some opposite things....

When you find this person, never let them go.......
Ge to really understand that person.....
Tell them your real feelings......
Break out your skeletons...
Hold back nothing........
Play no games.....
Show love.....
Be real....

You know......
When it is right......
Any two can fall in love.....
If it is meant to be, it will happen......

Family is the best treasure
And its a great pleasure
Life is almost as light feather
I have a friend named heather
Now you know my treasure
And that is my favorite
And great pleasures

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
I will fear no evil, for you are with me
Your rod and your staff, they comfort me

I honestly grow insecure as I get older
Because even when you hot there comes a day when you get colder

Comes a day when you slower, time is taking its toll
45 on the back of the jersey upon your soul

I'm scared of letting go, I don't know what the future holds
My nightmares are having nightmares
I'm quite scared of what's right and fair

How I fear an eternity
Will I hear well done when he turn to me?

Will I hear you care too much about
All this stuff that really don't matter?

You chase the wind and you don't want it
Got to the top of a 2 foot ladder

What's after I can capture all this mess my heart was after?
Will I end up empty-handed when I stand before my master?
Did I master the mathematics of a passive disaster?

Add in my selfish ambition
All the while, subtracting what matters
I don't know

At late nights, I can't sleep
Will I fall? Will I peep?

Through the curtains, all I see, fingers pointed at me
And they watching, and they watching
And I'm wondering what they thinking and thinking bout'
At late nights, I can't sleep
Counting cash, counting sheep

In high school, we tried to act all tough
I remember a couple times, I couldn't back that up
Like when I ran from them vetoes, scuffing up my sapatos
Scared of losing my high, I was so embarrassed inside
If I could go back in time, I would stand and say something like

I ain't never scared, never scared, never scared
I'm lying, I'm scared of these thoughts in my head
I'm scared of possibly pushing people right over the ledge
When I say I pledge allegiance to the struggle

Then, I turn around and buckle
Under stress and under pressure

Bible on my dresser that can teach my pain a lesson
But I rather not address it
Address that's in depression

I'm scared if I confess it
That you gonna' look at me like I'm something less
And I'm such a mess

And it just so happen, I'm wrestling with my status
I'm trying to see me like He do, not focusing on this madness

They count on me, count me out on a count of they fear and doubts
Keep account of my wrongs, trying to keep me inside they house

Some just keep me around, I wonder what that's about
Yeah! They wanna be politically correct, I suppose
But I'm comfortable in my skin

While they just pretending they clothes
I'm scared of falling and failing
In front of all of my foes

And I feel some friends are unfaithful
So, I keep my small circle closed
I don't want no handouts or favors, no functional saviors
I'm a tell that truth till it **** me

I'm chilling with my Creator
Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus to all of my haters
For the ones that think I forgot him
And the ones who won't let me say
I ain't scared no mo'

Everybody always
have  has something to say rather you like it or not
But, don't take it to heart

As the winter winds blow in the night.... I hear howling sounds with thoughts of freight.... With thoughts of pain and feelings of hurt.... I try to run but my legs won't work... Will my time come from a sharpened knife.... Could this be the end of my life..... Is it fear of the night that i hold.... Did it come from a dream that feels so cold.... These thoughts I feel keep me trapped.... Someone please wake me with a slap....

The fears in my life are so many

The fear of being alone all your life, not finding anyone
The fear of being in a relationship because of a break up
The fear of falling in love because of the thoughts of hurt

Fear, why do we always keep it near

Fear of not succeeding keeps us from trying
The fear of trying frightens us at times

Does fear ever end, is it embedded in our head
or do we use fear as an excuse

The tears that fall beneath my eyes,
are droplets of pain as I cry....

As the tears run down my face,
all my fears now scare this place....

As I try not to tremble within,
my mind is racing about life's end...

As I try to control my emotions,
I can not find a reason or notion....

I once found love and life was great,
now it's gone and my heart still aches...

The feelings of love must be a myth,
The one's I meet can't come to grips..

Is it better to ****,
and never to love....

And lose those feelings,
of wanting love....

I'm tired of being wrong, in the times of unknown.

I'm tired of being being right, when it causes a fight.

I love feelings, that i'm a believer.

I hate the feelings, from this world of hate.

I  challenge the uknown and the one's that hate.

To figure things out, to embrace their hate.

How does one actually get into one's heart....
How does one know actually where to start.....

Could it be from the look in one's eyes.....
Could it be from the words of no dispise....

Does it start by the looks of one.....
Does it start by the words of one...

Will it happen by the luck of the draw....
Will it happen through *** and desire.....

Do you look into a person's past.....
Do you look into a person's future....

Has games been played that makes you afraid....
Has drama been there that will cause you to stray.....

Life is funny and pretty much predictable.....
Life can be lonely at times, yet sustainable....

Is it the choice of the matter....
Is it the matter of the choice....

When does one find the heart they want....
When does one give up their heart to another.....

Have you ever met a person
And didn't have a clew.

But for some unknown reason
They grew on you

Is it what they say
Or
What they do
Or
Is it their heart you feel
That gets to you

I say all the time
That life is somewhat strange

This is to you
A beautiful person
That's is so true

LOVE
A beautiful thing

Do you need somebody to love
Can't find somebody to love
Don't you need somebody to love
You better find somebody to love

How do you find love
Give love and love will find you

Some people can be difficult to love
So we don't even try or even care

But GOD says
Love them as I've loved you
You'll bring me Glory
And my love
You will share

Where do bad folks go when they die
They don't go to heaven where the angels fly

They go to the bottom of a fire and fry
And I won't see them again until I die

I knew many who took their last breath
With a needle in their arm and you know the rest

They went to their grave just a little too soon
They flew away howling on the yellow moon

Now these people cry and these people moan
They look for a good place to call their home

They try to find some place to rest their bones
While the demons and the devils try to make them their own

They go to the bottom of a fire and fry

As the fog of my life rolls in I am somewhat blinded and stunned.

Is it because of my past from the times from .my sins.

Is it mt disasters of love which was my pain.

It left me with a crippling heart that had me feel shame.

Opiates were once my life, which controlled me more then love

It controlled my body and owned my soul.

As the dog finally clears I can now find my life.

A life of dreams to help others means and begin a new life.

I live my life from memories
Of people and places of what I want to see

Forever

My common ground is my own mind
The love I have may one day die

Forever

I see my life of how I want to be
A brief description I see in me

Forever

Life will come with ups and downs
The feelings inside should never die

Forever

Keep on dreaming and thinking
About your life

Forever