age
is
arbitrary!
is how i justify whiskey shots on the front porch with adults
singing drunken renditions of Wish You Were Here
it's tender and when our disharmonic voices pierce the quiet street
we all cry a little.

Kimmy puts her arm around me and tells me i am
going
to
do
great
things
maybe it's the alcohol burning up my throat
or something in the light

the
world
is
mine
to
change

woke up in a circle of your icy sweat. ironic after a night that made me drip
heat
leaving you scares me so i try to slip away unnoticed but i always kiss your eyes before i go
and i always love you most
the only one i have ever spared from the
brutality
of my indecision
as it turns out, brutality ***** and the look on your lips when you asked if we could be forever eliminated any chance of that anyway

i would win a staring contest over a man with no eyelids for you

the thing about love is that it makes
my
spine straight
my path clear and it came the second i stopped needing it

That chair creaked
as if rocking rocking rocking would rock away the
sickness
That cat curled
on his lap as if its warmth would dissolve away the
sadness
That frosted the air of
That house
That body
That life

it is there,
and then it is not.

his children inherit his things that they are mostly too tenderhearted to use and laugh because of new understanding that everything is fleeting.

eating Thai curry in small increments because no two curries are the same something like snowflakes and i want to feel flavors burn on my tongue.                 pacing is everything except when it is not attacking devouring smoking tumbling fondling smothering
over doing it

feels right. right as right can be when having an idea of right is wrong. improvisation, dear
making
it up as you go along and along and align your thoughts with your bones
what would it be like to go sleep and never wake up? meet me at the first star on the right and straight on til morning

                                  we were too big for that place and everyone knew it

she won't look you in the eye and her
hands shake as she
organizes twelve pills a day seven days a drawn out week
things are fine for
now,
the tv runs, food stamps are in order, a smoke once in a
while.

she used to believe
Someone is after me
Someone is after me and i have to run away
she twisted her eight year old's hand in hers and told him they were going on an adventure
he was happy when his suitcase was stolen
he didn't have to carry it  from state to state to state
anymore.

               mom, you went to college?
               yes, i went to college
               teachers say college will make life good
               yes
               why isn't life good?

stability means being hallowed out and left to an empty room.