This is what I remember:
The planks leaned against the wall
would fall if we weren't careful
Tarzan swinging on the frayed black snakes
that coiled around the beams
because if they could still power florescents  
no one ever told us.
We shattered the old windows stacked in the briers
to make our new home shimmer
when we set the hay ablaze
because if they were going to use them for the house
no one ever told us.
We heard dad call the
pit of snakes insulation
but we killed them all with shovels,
couldn't risk it.
Never knowing the real snakes
were slipping under the front door
and though big brothers might have known
we were fighting the wrong war
no one ever told us.
Or maybe we don't remember
when you said to be careful in the barn
but to go ahead and play out there
and not to hurry home.

Its interesting because
the girls were wearing sunglasses in the dark.
They thought it was funny
and it made them feel brave.
And though they were sitting
they felt bigger than the boys
who shuffled awkwardly by the open door,
with their hands in their pockets.
When they would leave
the girls would laugh that
they had probably never
stayed out past eleven.
Probably only had a sip of
dad's beer at a wedding.
They're so lame they laughed,
waking up early for soccer practice.
The boys looked down at the girls
sitting in dusty lawn chairs in the garage
sipping stale beers they stole
from a mother who had too many.
One laughed but it was hostile.
One laughed but it was nervous.
They couldn't believe the barefooted one
with bruised shins was skipping practice.
The team captain rolled her eyes.
What squares. What losers.
This is what young and happy looks like.

Join us!
Join us!
We think you'll like our mission!
We're looking for new members
in the sad girl coalition!
We prefer girls with anxiety
and an affinity for plants.
Feminist views a must,
and a willingness to dance.
Gear needed to fit in here:
a rescue cat, a hammock,
an emotionally damaged cactus,
yoga, knitting, hula hooping,
or some other quirk you practice.
Duties are quite simple;
Defend your girls in online rants
about the current state of the nation.
Comment, "love the yoga pants!"
when a sister nails a headstand.
Click love instead of like
when a member shares the anthem
and keep adding to the ranks
of the sad girl coalition!

God isn't in the church, boys.
Can't find him on your cross.
We looked in all religions
even scoured cathedral halls.
God isn't our father
and he never was a son.
Well, in one way I suppose
our creator actually was.
God, she's in our sunlight.
She's in the air we breathe.
You'll find your God inside of you.
You'll find your God in trees.

I'm leaving you honey.
Yeah there's no other way to say it.
Yes, because I'll never be with you honey.
**** its hard to say it.
I'm leaving you honey.
Do you need me to explain it?
Its a sad kind of funny, honey
because we never really named it.
I'm leaving you honey,
hardest thing I'll ever do.
Spend some time with me honey,
one last time let me love you.

The President of drowned immigrants.
President elect of white supremacists.
President of "Climate Change is a hoax."
President of the Muslim registry.
President elect of uneducated ignorance.
Commander and Chief of disability impersonations.
President of Plan Parenthood's funeral.
President of Grab em' by the *****.
President of "Taxes are for losers."
President elect of bear infested schools.
President of the United States of America.

Hey dad did you know
the chicken we keep
locked in the garage
lays brown eggs
in the dusty stacks
of disregarded things?
Did you know I find every one?
A survivalist Easter hunt
in a salmonella **** shed.
You didn't know because
I never told you, for fear
you'd eat them as a joke,
or worse throw them away.
But you left the door open
and she's gone anyway.

Hey dad did you know
my car broke down on 17th street?
You do because I called you
on your way to church at midnight.
You wished me luck.
You'll pray for me.
You gave me the car,
thank you.

Hey dad did you know
that I once used
your hand made birthday card
to stop the bleeding of a neighbor boy
who thought your Scottish swords were fake?
No you don't because you weren't home.

Hey dad do you realize
you voted against me this year?
I lost my insurance last week.
You do know, but do you care?
You keep saying that you love me.
You yelled at all my races.
Asked for prayers when I had surgery.
Learned the names of all my friends.
Read my poetry when I was 13.

But hey dad did you know
that was never what I needed?

I needed a dad that didn't
have the nerve to joke
about how I made
new families with my dolls,
and friends when I was older.
I needed a dad who instead of
acting like his family was taken from him
kept his together.

And smaller things too.
I needed money for school.
I needed doctor visits.
I need my insurance now, dad.
I needed food, and a dad
who picked me up from school.

And a dad that instead of praying for me
raised me like my life wasn't broken,
raised me like I didn't always owe him.