her bare back was like a foreshadowing of the apocalypse,
your face unseen.
i couldn't even close the door,
not the way i wanted to, with a SLAM.
because then you'd know i was standing there, that i was unsure which empty room was offered to me.
it wasn't that room,
that room was full,
packed to the brim with kisses that weren't mine, strokes that were not mine.
that room was intoxicating, i felt lightheaded, i couldn't breathe.
i barely had anything to drink.
i am lost,
excluded from the beauty.
but i was lightning, you were thunder,
you can't have one without the other.
but it was rushed, and she left with a relieving SLAM early in the morning.
so i made tea, and you let me lay in your bed all day,
and sleep and listen to love songs, and watch old movies.
and we were as close as we could get without touching.
and we didn't really say anything,
and that was okay.