Empathy is a curse,
but apathy is surely worse.
Make me feel something when I feel hollow.
Get away from me when it's too hard to swallow.

*** is
the only way I've been able
to satisfy my desire for you,
without sticking a straw in my nose,
or shoving pills down my throat,
or smoking god knows what.
*** is
the only way I've been able
to not cry out to you.
Yet,
somehow *** makes me yearn for you more,
*** makes me crave you more,
and *** makes me realize how desperately I want you.

It's always been you,
from the day I've met you.
There's been other girls,
too many other girls,
too few other girls,
and there's been you.
So unattainable,
so out of reach,
but not out of mind.
There's always been you,
and until you are in my bed,
until your fingers leave marks on my back,
until yours is the first voice I hear,
you will not be out of mind,
and even after then you will not be out of mind.

I found myself a dying sun,
I lay ashore, all mem'ries gone,
Beneath a sky of crimson clay,
Where every world spends its last day.

The dusty sand beneath my form
I used to love looks so forlorn.
The waves crash down with energy
They do not wish to share with me.

I am tired of it all,
Sick to death, I take the fall.
Down to the void, abyss,
Without parting glass or kiss.

You will not find me here tomorrow,
I have drowned myself in sorrow.
The bleakest darkness of my past
Swells in the distance like a mast.

I shall not perish, all the same.
Your world is evil and insane,
Yet I shall rise again at last
While you'll be buried in the past.

I'm sitting here  trying to relive everything you've ever said to me
Hoping you're doing the same but knowing I cross your mind as as often as last nights homework.
You belong to me in the same way the rocket ships belong to the moon. I've never had the courage to land so I stay in orbit hoping your gravity pulls me in.
I've learned that people can never  really belong to people and We throw around the word love like its a mythical creature that's always just out of our reach.
I realized I'm in love with the tiny broken prices that seem to fall off of you when you walk.
And Your words are earthquakes and I'm a house of cards.
I've accepted that you'll never truly belong and I'll spend the rest of my life trying to get to a place that doesn't exist